Trying Not To Love You
by raeghostwriter
Summary: Two months, three weeks and give or take about 10 hours ago she realized she had fallen for her best friend. Her beautiful, intelligent, co-worker, way out of her league as a person in general, very straight, best friend. (I don't own the characters - M for future chapters. THIS STORY IS STILL IN PROGRESS SO JOIN THE RIDE. I've missed these ladies, what about you?)
1. Chapter 1

It was a perfect, fall morning. The leaves under her shoes crunched against the harsh, cold 6:00 am silence. The temperature had dropped overnight in Boston, but her routine was unshaken, she simply added another layer before walking out the door. Her morning jog (and routine) was essential for her sanity.

Whenever asked she's told people she keeps her routine as strict as possible because so much of her job is reactive, with very little in her control. And to be fair, until two and half months ago, that was exactly the reason. She needed the mundane in order to cope with the extremes of being a homicide detective. Now, however, she also ran to drain her body. She needed to feel her muscles strain and her brain to switch into autopilot. In that state, she was forced to cope with the physical feelings, which helped distract her from the emotional ones.

Two months, three weeks and give or take about 10 hours ago she realized she had fallen for her best friend. Her beautiful, intelligent, co-worker, way out of her league as a person in general, very straight, best friend. There had always been something unspoken between them, a connection that was more than friends, but she had placed it under the category of family. Maura was family. She mattered more than most, heck she mattered more than anybody, and that was sacred. Yes they bantered and flirted with the line of appropriate versus inappropriate comments towards each other. It was part of the wiring of their friendship. And of course Maura was beautiful. You'd have to be dumb and blind not to notice her. She was always dressed to impress, her designer clothes she both wore with pride and as a shield. None of this, however, had prepared Jane to come face to face with….feelings.

It was a simple moment when she realized it. She was turning to say goodnight to Maura after an evening out together. Like she did every time they went out, she walked Maura up to her front door. They were still laughing at something that had happened at their dinner earlier. It was very them. Easy, effortless. Jane felt at peace and content, a much needed 180 degree turnaround after a particularly hard case involving a young girl. She needed that time with Maura, a safe space to talk or not talk but a mutual understanding that they were healing each other in those moments. A reminder that good things still existed. She wonders now if her natural guard was down more than usual because of that and potentially the wine from dinner.

The light of the house's entryway poured down across Maura's blonde curls and soft curves and Jane's breath caught somewhere in her chest. She just couldn't stop looking at her. A shift inside her change from an awareness that Maura was a beautiful woman in general to Maura was so goddamn beautiful to her. The kind of beautiful you really wished other people would stop touching.

Whatever mirage she had placed around her growing feelings for Maura finally shattered. In that moment she was awestruck. She openly allowed her eyes to travel all the way down slender shoulders, full breasts, sharp hips, and strong calves. When her eyes traveled back up she met hazel ones staring back at her. Maura's head was tilted and it became apparent Jane had missed whatever question she was just asked.

Jane cleared her throat for good measure before asking, "I'm sorry, what did you just say?"

Maura had caught her staring. A small smile, that made her dimples painfully adorable, played across her lips, "I asked if you wanted a nightcap before you headed home."

Jane's feelings were too overwhelming. The weight of them felt heavy, they hung thick in the air around her and she couldn't quite swallow the reality. She didn't want to leave. She wanted to pull Maura into her arms. She wanted to smell her perfume and the hint of vanilla that she always associated with Maura. She wanted to feel soft skin under her own rough hands. And all her want was terrifying her. She couldn't stay.

"Not tonight Maur. I had enough to drink at dinner and we have work tomorrow. I'll see you in the morning, ok?" She spoke as if it was a question, but internally it was a statement. She never made eye contact after she spoke nor did she wait for a response. She turned on her heel and took off as fast as she could to her car parked in the driveway.

She wished she was a bigger person - a more rational person. A rational person who would sit and take the time to begin working through those feelings. She, instead, had been running (hypothetically and quite literally) ever since that night. She upped her morning run from three to five, sometimes seven miles. She added boxing in the precinct gym on the evenings she wasn't working late because of a case. Whenever she came home and found herself antsy she would add an ab workout simply to secure a more restful sleep. The ache from her constant workouts had begun transitioning into even more defined muscles, especially across her abdomen, shoulders, and biceps. She had always been in shape, lean in stature simply by nature, but now her normal high calorie intake was barely keeping up to the constant churn her body was in. If she slowed down enough to be honest with herself she would have realized that the external muscle burn had yet to compare, let enough slow, the internal fire building inside her.

Two Months, Three Weeks, and 10 days of minimizing her alone time with Maura. Focusing more on pushing Maura into the relationship she had started around the same time with Jack. Weeks of cancelling plans whenever she could without it causing suspicion. Hours of holding her breath when Maura's hands lingered on her arm or hand or back. Jane knew that this charade would only last so long. Maura knew her better than anyone. Perhaps the only reason it had lasted as long as it did was Maura was distracted with Jack. This fact alone gave Jane some space to breath, but infuriated her at the same time. She knew this wasn't fair. She knew she couldn't push Maura away and beg for her affection. It didn't make it any easier. So she dealt with it how she deals with everything that could create a vulnerability - she shoved it down and pretended it didn't matter.

In the middle of her fourth mile, halfway through the park downtown, her phone began to ring. Without slowing her stride she lifted the phone to check the caller and groaned when she saw 'Dispatch' displayed across her screen.

"Rizzoli" she answered in a pant as she stopped to the side of the sidewalk. Dispatch reported a murder had happened, she was needed, and gave the address.

"That's only two blocks from my current location, I can be there in five minutes."

Despite the fact it was a Saturday morning Jane still had her badge hidden beneath her layers. She was on call this weekend and while she didn't feel comfortable having her gun during her run, she always tried to keep her badge with her. She felt like she needed to be prepared for that uncontrollable factor to her job - other people.

She arrived on scene faster than the five minutes she predicted, the extra adrenaline of a new case had added to her stride. She showed her badge before ducking under the tape and nodding to the officer as he assisted lifting it over her head. The neighborhood was quiet and the house she was walking up to was no different. From the outside it looked peaceful, wholesome even, hiding whatever horrible act had happened from the surrounding homes and people. She glanced at her watch to realize it was still a few minutes before seven.

The peaceful exterior was simply a distraction to the truth. Once inside officers were already bustling around in the entryway. On top of that, the heat was overwhelming inside the house, compared to the cold air of the morning and the smell of death in the house was overpowering. With such an extreme change both in temperature and smell, in parallel to her body being a little more dehydrated than she expected, Jane found herself feeling a little dizzy. Glancing around she realized as far as her team was concerned, she was the first detective on scene which meant she had about five seconds to get her shit together and get to work. She did her best to shake off the unsteady feeling she was having, cursing herself for skipping dinner last night.

She grabbed gloves from the box at the front door and put them on as she walked into the living room where the body was laying sprawled out on the floor. As she walked up to the body two officers were carelessly stomping through her crime scene which just pissed her off to no end. Do they even know how to do their jobs?! She cursed

"Hey you two idiots! You are literally standing in the blood of our victim. Let's show a little respect, can we?"

The officers shared the dumbest looks Jane swore she had ever seen and began to back up which caused her to yell again, "Jesus can you watch where you are going?! You just stepped on the vic's hair. I can only imagine the irritation the ME will feel when he gets here" Jane spat at them.

"When SHE gets here," said the voice behind her interjected. Maura. She wasn't supposed to be on call. Jane checked. Twice. It was supposed to be Dr. Pike. And despite the fact that most days Jane despised that man, it was easier to manage his crazy right now than her own that seemed to stir inside her whenever Maura was around.

Maura's hand ran down the back of Jane's right arm as she stepped around and in front of Jane. Maura began to give calculated directions to her team and they swarmed in to begin their tasks. Jane, however, stood still. Even through her layers Jane could feel goosebumps spreading down her arm where Maura's touch came and went.

Maura looked back at her with a questioning look and slightly sad smile, "I'm sorry to disappoint you detective" Her tone sounded defeated and it brought Jane back to present.

"I'm just surprised to see you is all Maura. I thought I heard Dr. Pike was on call this weekend. Sincerely my mistake." Jane tried to lie. She hated the defeated look Maura was giving her. "A welcomed surprised I assure you" she added for good measure.

"I see," Maura replied back. Her tone not disguising the fact she didn't completely believe Jane. "Dr Pike asked me to cover his weekend and I was happy to oblige. Hopefully this will allow our schedules to re-sync. We were always on call together, Jane. I have no idea who messed that up in the scheduling." Maura's words sounded innocent, but Jane knew she was caught. She knew that Maura was at the very least suspicious as to why Jane had been on call nearly every weekend except the ones she worked. It had taken many favors, threats, and bribes to create the space without it getting back to Maura.

She was about to reply back, but she heard her name called behind her. She turned to face Sergeant Vince Korsak - her once mentor and partner, now boss.

"What have we got?" Korsak asked.

Jane shook her head, "I just got here myself, with Maura right behind me." She looked back to give Maura a nod to realize Maura was no longer standing with her. Maura had moved on to begin examining the body.

It was seven am, on a Saturday. Maura had arrived only minutes after Jane, and yet in pure Maura fashion, she was perfectly put together. She was dressed in a dark purple blouse, with a square neckline and gray pencil skirt. Both pieces hugged her body perfectly while still being professional. Her heels, of course, complimented the entire ensemble and made her legs impossible not to notice.

Jane couldn't help but stare at her for a moment longer as she gracefully shook her loose curls back out of her face, careful not to use the gloves already on her hands. As she walked forward towards Maura, Korsak, and the body she squared her shoulders. It was time to shake it off, Detective Rizzoli was at work.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author Note: Thank you, everyone, for your follows and reviews so far! Sorry for the small delay here, but hope you continue to enjoy. Chapter 3 is already almost done. You should see it at latest tomorrow afternoon (EST). I have ideas through chapter 5, but I can keep building this out if I keep hearing from you guys and you are enjoying it. I've missed these ladies!**_

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About an hour later Maura was ready to send the body to the morgue for further investigation. Korsak and Jane had been able to collect all the evidence available to them and were simply waiting for the body to be removed. Technically as soon as the detectives had what they needed they were no longer required to stay, but as soon as Maura was part of the team Jane had made it a standard practice. If Maura was on the scene, so was someone from Jane's team. Final answer. Jane never felt comfortable leaving Maura unprotected, regardless if it was 8:00 am in a rich neighborhood. They were investigating what was clearly a murder (though of course, Maura would not confirm yet on the scene) and that meant this location, like every location, was not free from potential harm.

While Jane stood, waiting protectively (and slightly impatiently) for Maura, she tried to continue to push the blurry vision she'd been fighting all morning from her line of sight. The one thing she felt more deeply than the desire for the room to stop spinning ever so slightly, was the ache in her chest. It was easy to forget how much she missed Maura simply in general when she stayed away. Ok, maybe easy was a bit of an understatement. Easier was probably more like it, not easy. It was easier when she couldn't hear her voice or see her smile or watch her work. Here and now, the pain was at the forefront of everything. God, she missed her. All of her.

The spinning was getting worse and the need to touch Maura (a need she minimized as best she could) was getting unbearable. The two together forced Jane to desperately desire some fresh air.

"Uh Korsak," Jane said just above a whisper. "I think I might need to step outside. Make sure Maura walks out with you."

Jane didn't need to state it. Even with Korsak as her superior no one would ever put Maura in danger. Simultaneously, no one would ever cross Jane when it came to Maura. Maura was both Jane's greatest strength and her Achilles heel. The distance Jane had put between the two of them had not gone unnoticed by Korsak. His gut told him there was a strong chance Jane finally figured out she's in love with Maura. And with almost forty years of trusting his gut as a detective and over ten years working with Jane, he knew he could rely on it.

It did, however, take Korsak a second to understand something was off beyond that, but as Jane walked away he began to see her steps falter.

Jane's face had started to lose color. She started towards the door without looking at him. The dizziness, mixed with extreme heat that really hadn't left the house was getting a little much for her. Removing her gloves first, she then stripped her sweatshirt and jacket as she walked towards the door.

"Jane" he yelled after her.

The concern and confusion in his voice triggered someone else's concern. Maura was immediately pulled out of her final directions to her team and her head snapped up towards Korsak's voice. Without second thought Maura was hot on Jane's heels out the front door.

Maura found Jane standing to the right of the front door, tucked as far away as possible from view but still inside the crime scene tape. It was barely over 40 degrees outside, but Jane had stripped down her upper body to only a simple white tank top. What was worse was that her tank top was soaked with sweat, clinging to her sports bra and muscular back. Her hands were clenched into fists at her sides holding her warmer clothing, the obvious tension rolling through her back, shoulders, and triceps. Even from behind her, it was obvious to Maura Jane was having a hard time steadying herself and standing up.

Jane had heard Maura's heels on the cement steps even before she approached. She begged herself to stay standing and prepared for the concern she knew she'd hear in the medical examiner's voice. She tried to hedge off the worry by saying, "I'm fine Maura" but her voice was weaker than she had hoped it would be.

"Jane you are soaked in sweat and your body is not properly covered for this weather. You most certainly are not fine." Maura's voice was laced with concern but came off authoritative, a clear indicator she was still in Dr. Isles mode while at the crime scene.

Jane turned around to defend her pride and immediately regretted it. She dropped her hands to her knees to steady herself and squeezed her eyes shut. She was angry at herself for showing weakness, she should never have skipped her dinner last night.

Maura's hand ran gently across Jane's back until her arm was wrapped around Jane, her palm gently placed against her ribcage. Despite every neuron in Jane's brain telling her to keep it together, she let out a whisper of a whimper at the touch. She kept her eyes squeezed shut, but took comfort in Maura's warmth and smell. With thought temporarily suspended, Jane slowly tilted her head towards that warmth and found sanctuary in the nook of Maura's neck.

The quiet whimper from Jane knotted itself in Maura's stomach. Jane had been so distant, so unneeding of Maura as of late. She had expected Jane to reject her approach, she was prepared for a bit of a fight, but instead, Jane had given into her instantly. And now as Jane's breath danced against her neck the knot began to flutter just a bit. A familiar feeling that felt wildly out of place began to surface inside Maura. Longing. She didn't understand it and pushed it aside to evaluate later.

Maura knew she needed to keep her guard up for both of them. Jane was out of sight now, but as soon as they took even three steps they would be in the view of reporters, cameras, detectives, officers, and onlookers.

"Jane I need you to stand up as best you can. We are going to confidently walk to my car, it's just right there, do you see it?" Maura pointed to less than 20 yards away. "I know you are trying to hold it together. Let me hold you together until we get there."

What is more dizzying than dehydration? Maura Isles. Maura instinctively had recognized Jane wouldn't want to look weak in front of everyone, that it would be too much for her to handle. So in a moment, she couldn't walk herself Maura held her together. And this is why Jane loved her. This is why it was impossible not to love her.

Jane slowly stood up, wrapped her arm around Maura's shoulder, took a deep breath, and opened her eyes. As Maura guided her forward she forced herself to share at least a tight-lipped smile and nodded as she walked past the officers and camera crew on the lawn. Maura walked her to the passenger seat, secured her inside, and then came around to the driver's side to sit with Jane. Maura turned the heat on lightly and handed her water bottle from the cup holder to Jane. She reached behind the passenger side seat where Jane sat and grabbed a banana from her purse.

"Based on your dizziness and coloring, I'm going to guess you are neither properly hydrated nor nourished today. Please drink the water and eat the banana. I'm locking you in here so don't you dare try to leave." Her voice was sweet but firm. Any objection Jane wanted to muster was muted by her need for her best friend's care.

Maura saw the conflicting emotions reveal themselves through microexpressions on Jane's face. Jane was her favorite, most frustrating subject. Some days it was like Jane was shouting her feelings through her expressions and mannerisms - and yet other times she was literally the most confusing person in the world to read. She would show one thing, but her voice's tone and actions right after those expressions would display something completely different. Today was the former, however. Jane was too off of her game to be so thorough about what she gave away.

Jane turned away from Maura a few seconds later, staring at her feet for a moment, and then closed her eyes. Maura knew she should get back to the crime scene to finish up, but along with the worry inside her, she felt the longing resurfaced itself again. It was this need to comfort Jane, but worse it was a need to touch Jane. A need to express herself through something more nurturing then just words. Maura reached for Jane's left wrist holding the water, ran her fingers over Jane's before taking the bottle from Jane's grip.

Maura opened the water and then looked back up to see Jane's eyes squeezed tighter still.

"Please Jane" she spoke gently. "I need you to drink a little bit of this"

Jane turned to Maura accompanied with a deep breath and slowly reached for the water bottle back. Maura watched her as she slowly took sips of water. She analyzed the expresses she saw moments earlier. The discomfort and worry made sense - Jane clearly wasn't feeling well and probably didn't like that she had shown any type of weakness. The express Maura was thrown by was the fear that flashed quickly and then vanished when Jane took a breath. It was masking something she wasn't able to make out fast enough. Questions rattled off in her brain. Is Jane feeling worse than I realize? Is Jane having nightmares again? Is Jane in trouble and I don't know anything about it?

"Stop," Jane said quietly. "I can hear your wheels turning over there, just stop."

"I can't help it, Jane. This isn't like you." Maura looked at Jane's face. Her forehead still crinkled in lines of anguish but she was drinking the water and Maura supposed she couldn't ask for too much more.

"Maura it's nothing. I was exhausted last night and fell asleep without eating. And when I woke up this morning I went for a run and was going to end it at the cafe over on 4th for breakfast." Jane took another deep breath, "I was called here before that could happen. It's just stupid timing. Don't worry about it"

Jane being too busy or too tired to eat made very little sense, especially since they did not have an active case in the past four days until this morning. The twitch in Jane's face as she spoke also told Maura this was a half-truth. And why would Jane go to the cafe on 4th, when her favorite cafe, especially for her Saturday morning feast (as Jane put it) was the exact opposite direction near Maura's neighborhood? All of it left Maura uneasy, but first, she knew she needed to get Jane's blood sugar and potassium up. Pressing the buttons of a starving Rizzoli was not something she was eager to do.

"Please keep drinking the water and eat your banana. And I mean it Jane, do not leave this car." Looking at Jane's uneasiness Maura knew there was no way Jane would stay even with her current threat so she played the card she knew Jane wouldn't mess with. "Promise me, Jane"

"I promise" Jane repeated back as if it was an annoyance.

Jane heard the click of the lock as Maura left. She also faintly heard Maura talking to a news reporter that they would have more to tell them later today. She felt so stupid and annoyed at herself and frustrated that now she had to stay here and wait like a child. She slowly finished the water and the banana as she waited for Maura to return.

Back in the house, Korsak approached Maura as soon as she returned. "All ok with Rizzoli?"

"She's dehydrated and she shouldn't have been out running this morning without proper nutrition, but she'll be fine," Maura responded with a bit of Dr. Isles in her tone. She walked up to her team and signed the papers for the body to be removed. She made a few more comments, grabbed her kit, and returned to Korsak's side. Korsak looked around realizing most had left and pulled Maura aside.

"Sorry Dr. Isles, but I need to ask again. Is everything ok with Jane?" His eyes were searching. His expression was soft and Maura knew this was no longer Sergeant Korask asking the Medical Examiner, this was Vince asking Maura. He was not just asking about today, he was asking about the ever-growing space between Jane and herself.

Maura knew she missed seeing Jane, probably more than she should. She also understood Jane probably had other things going on, even though she wasn't sure what. The honest to God truth was that Maura had no idea what was going on with Jane. She had barely spoken to Jane outside of work items in weeks. The reality was gut-wrenching.

A memory of two weeks ago quickly flashed through Maura's mind -

 _It was a wonderful, rare moment where they were together without it being work-related. Jane had agreed to let Maura buy her coffee and they even left the precinct to do it. They were walking up to the counter when Maura notice Jane noticing a very handsome man pouring cream into his coffee. What was surprising to Maura was not that Jane noticed someone, but that recognition flashed across her face._

 _Jane asked Maura if she was good to order for the both of them, Maura nodded slightly out of shock, and then watch Jane walk towards him. When she walked up to the two of them, after paying with coffees in hand, the man had his hand on Jane's arm lightly holding her just above the elbow. Jane's back was to Maura but she could clearly see the man's face which was one of kindness and a clear joy to be seeing Jane. Maura heard him say, "Looking forward to seeing you again on Friday. 7 pm, don't be late." He said with a smile and laugh. He then winked at Jane, which is something Jane only lets Maura do without her getting ruffled. Noticing Maura approaching he nodded to her and turned around to leave._

 _"Who was that Jane?" Maura asked as she handed Jane her coffee. She had added a slightly flirtatious tone hoping to make Jane blush and spill the beans she was clearly keeping from Maura._

 _Jane snorted, a Jane Rizzoli defense mechanism, and asked, "Why?"_

 _"Well, he's very cute Jane. If you aren't interested seeing him, surely you could have introduced me" Maura flirted out again. She wanted to put Jane on edge to get more information from her. She missed their playful banter._

 _"Oh really?" Jane said with a tone of something Maura couldn't quite put her finger on in the moment, "Why, has something happened with Mr. Perfection?"_

 _"Jane" Maura teased back at the perfection comment. "Jack and I are not exclusive. We are still getting to know each other."_ _Maura was surprised to see Jane's facial expressions weren't as playful as she was expecting when she looked up from her own coffee. Until that moment they have both had been looking down at the counter and their coffees adding cream (or in Jane's case a 1/2 lb of sugar) as they spoke._

 _When Jane made no other comments, Maura tried one more ribbing, "So who is he Jane?" trying desperately to sound playful and not heartbroken that Jane wouldn't tell her anything about the man she was dating._

 _"Oh, Derek? He's my therapist Maur" Jane deadpanned. Maura rolled her eyes. She hated when Jane used humor to get out of something and she was going to call her on it until their phones went off with a call from dispatch._

Jane was dating some mystery man. AND Jane had been encouraging Maura to spend time in her new relationship so Maura had done just that. That space was, however, no one else's business. Maura felt defensive, but mostly she felt helpless. She honestly had nothing to report to him even if she did feel like he was being nosey.

"I honestly have no idea Vince" Maura replied.

"Maura I'm not asking you to reveal Janie's secrets or anything, but something is going on. It's... well it's changing her somehow." Vince was sincere, but it didn't stop Maura from snapping back at him.

"So you assume I did something? How is that fair? Maybe it's Derek who has her all thrown off. Honestly..." Maura cut off what she was going to say when she noticed that while Vince's concern had not left his face, it, however, had been joined by a small smile.

"Are you referring to Derek Jacobson?" Vince asked, trying desperately hold back the smile that had started to tickle at his cheeks. He had never heard jealousy flow so easily from Maura Isles' tone and now was not the time to tease her.

"Oh, so you've met him? Jane doesn't have the decency to share these things with her best friend, but you even know his last name?" Maure knew she was being childish, but it stung. "I need to get back Vince. I left Jane in the car and her likelihood of staying there decreases with every minute I'm still standing here."

"Ok, but Maura you should talk to Janie. When you feel comfortable. I didn't mean to hit a nerve. I'm just worried."

Maura nodded and walked to the car.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author Note: Chapter Three as promised! This chapter is about double the size of the last two, thanks for your patience. Chapter Four is in the works and hopefully will be up on Thursday. Stick with me as we build out the tension, I promise our breaking point is just around the corner.**

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Jane was physically feeling better, which basically meant emotionally she was feeling much worse. Now that the room was no longer spinning, her emotions were swarming. She kept dancing between being frustrated at herself for temporarily acting unprofessional, to berating herself for showing weakness, to being so embarrassed at herself for needing Maura the way she did. The way she still did right now. She desperately wanted to remove herself from the car, but she had promised. Maura played her cards well.

Jane was in her third round of fighting with herself when Maura returned. The driver side door swung open and Maura entered along with a cold burst of the outside air. The sun was shining through the car from behind Maura, highlighting the honey in the blonde's hair and making her skin look even fairer against her deep purple top and now tan overcoat. To say she looked breathtaking was wildly underplaying it in Jane's mind. There was no one more beautiful than Maura Isles, even in the simplest of moments like these.

"Thank you for waiting," Maura said as she closed the door behind her and placed her kit in the backseat. "I was half expecting to be mad at you when I returned and you had left."

"I promised," said Jane plainly as if nothing else needed to be said.

"Yes, you did," Maura commented back softly. Staring at Jane who had turned to look out the window. "It's why I wasn't fully prepared." Maura joked trying to pull a Jane Rizzoli and soften the mood. It worked, at least a little because a smirk played on Jane's lips.

"So Maur" Jane started, her tone playful causing Maura to instantly relaxed realizing her little quip had done just the trick. "What level of fretting are we at?"

"I don't quite understand Jane," Maura said with her signature head tilt she did just towards Jane. While Maura tilted her head often when she was fascinated or unsure of things, she added this little lip bite when she tilted her head at Jane. It was one of Jane's favorite looks of Maura's, the lip biting a small addiction of Jane's.

"Well, was this like a level one type of fretting where you were worried, but now that I'm ok you'll let me jog back to my apartment? Or is this like an extreme level five where you are going to helicopter me for the next several days potentially even calling in back up?"

"Ha," Maura smiled showing her dimples and watched as Jane's face portrayed composure. Had Maura not seen Jane still slowing wringing her hands and touching her scars she would have thought Jane was completely herself. She also knew that while Jane had cracked a joke, it was laced with an honest question. The only way to get past the firewall of Jane was to start by playing her game.

"I would say a level three Jane" Maura began. "I won't annoy you with my hovering for too long, but I am driving you home and at least making you something more to eat. We can take it from there once I'm satisfied you aren't going to pass out or get dizzy again." With that, Maura pulled the car onto the road.

"Fair enough," Jane said back, smiling at Maura for playing along. "And you never annoy me, Maur."

A soft smile flashed across Maura's face as she focused on the road, "I'll keep that in mind."

During the twenty minute drive to Jane's apartment they sat in comfortable silence. Jane had stopped wringing her hands and for the last few minutes, before Maura had pulled up behind Jane's car, Maura felt Jane's eyes watching her. When she put the car in park, she finally had the opportunity to face Jane. Jane's eyes were soft, thoughtful even.

Jane reached over to put her hand on Maura's that was still sitting on the shifter. "Thank you, Maura. I know it was stupid to have skipped eating, I really freaked myself out back there. I can be a stubborn piece of work sometimes. And while it's just a natural reaction for you to care, I don't want you to think it also goes unnoticed or unappreciated. So. Thank you."

Between the contact of Jane's hand and the sincere words from Jane's lips, Maura felt that feeling again. Longing. What was going on with her today? Heat flushed across her chest as Jane ran her thumb back and forth across Maura's knuckles. Maura realized she never told Jane how much she missed her. She'd been suffering in silence because she wanted Jane to be happy and she had enjoyed her time with Jack, but the power of a simple act like this and Maura was thrown off course. All of the dates and sexy nights and sweet romantic gestures from Jack over the past couple months minimized by the soft graze of a thumb. Maura shuttered slightly at the realization of how incomplete she felt without her best friend around.

"Jane" Maura started. She wanted to get Jane's attention before she kept going. She wanted to look into those brown eyes and make sure all the things she was feeling would somehow transfer between them and stick inside the stubborn brain of the detective. She knew that she hadn't even sorted herself out from each of the moments that caused her to take pause today, but Jane always accepted her as she was. She didn't need to be perfect or have the perfect thing to say. Her heart was pounding hard in her chest and she feared Jane could feel her rapid pulse through her wrist.

Jane looked up into intense, hazel eyes that were full of warmth and emotion. If Maura wanted her attention, she had it. Jane knew she was playing with fire. All the distance, all the carefully planned exit plans to keep her guard up were out the window when the Medical Examiner looked at her like this. These were the confusing moments. The moments when Jane wondered if these feelings were mutual. These were the moments she had worked hard to avoid. These were also the moments she craved and like any addict now that she was in the middle of it, she felt like nothing could break her trance.

"I've really m.." Maura's phone in the cup holder between them began to ring and cut her off mid-sentence. A second later it continued to ring through the Bluetooth of the car. Both women jumped, the moment ruined. When Jane saw Jack's name flash across the screen, she shook herself back into reality. The fullness she felt just a moment before gone and the emptiness painful and staggering.

Maura could physically see Jane's walls go back up. Jane sat up, squared her shoulders, and cracked her neck. They were still in the same seats, but Jane felt miles away now.

"Jane" Maura said desperately. The call wasn't going to change the fact she was going to look after her friend. The call didn't change the fact she missed Jane desperately. If anything it just made everything even more confusing, but in the moment Maura couldn't get a word out. She tried to rack her brain with the right thing to stay to stop the fortress Jane was quickly building back between them.

"Answer it" Jane's rasp sharp and pointed. When Maura froze still unable to decide what to do, Jane reached over and pushed the answer button on Maura's steering wheel to force Maura's hand and then got out of the car.

Jane could hear, "Hi sweetness" come from the car and it made her want to vomit. It was like a metaphorical knife had stabbed into her gut and was twisting. Her detox had begun and it was worse than the last one. Why did she do that? That wasn't smart and it wasn't fair to anyone. She knew technically nothing had happened, but inside her, everything had happened. Jane blazed to the front door of her building and unlocked it before heading up to her apartment. When she was opening her own door she heard heels beginning to click on the first set of stairs. Maura was less than two minutes behind her, based her normal walking pace.

Jane realized there were two ways to handle this. Her normal, brazen nature would lock Maura out just to prove a point. Yes, Maura had a key but locking the door created a disruption. It proved a point. I'm more than fleeting moments when Jack can't be there for you. It was the mantra Jane had been waking up to and the nightmare that caused her endless nights of restlessness. So she had changed paths. She pivoted. Maura was too important and if Jane wasn't careful, if she didn't get it together, she could lose the best thing that ever happened to her. Jane would sacrifice if it meant Maura was still her best friend. But she still was fierce, she was still irrational sometimes and, well, human. Locking the door had some kind of gritty glory to it.

The other option was Jane could simply wait for Maura to enter. Not waiting at the door with open arms, but accept it would happen either way. It was something Jane was trying to cling to. Acceptance of the uncontrollable. It hadn't totally been working out, but she was trying. And so in that moment, the moment that was about twenty or so more heel clicks away from Maura facing her door, she chose acceptance. She had already made a fool of herself twice today - nearly fainting and then basically fawning, a trifecta would all but seal the deal of Maura forcing a conversation Jane wasn't ready to have.

Jane began taking her shoes off, deciding on a shower as her next course of action, when Maura entered. Maura's face was flushed and shocked.

"That wasn't fair Jane," she said immediately upon entering. "How dare you answer my phone and then leave me like that!" Maura wasn't shouting, but she wasn't soft about it either.

Maura had been prepared to be locked out and there to be a fired up Rizzoli on the other side of that lock. So when she came up to a cracked door and a slightly defused woman taking off her shoes, she was a little shook. When she took a deep breath she began to look around the apartment which only continued her confusion. Jane tended to live in organized chaos. She wasn't a slob, but she wasn't tidy either. And yet as Maura looked around the room there was no mess anywhere to be seen. Not a shoe out of place or a beer bottle still on the coffee table from last night. In fact, even her shelves that were normally adorably cluttered with a few too many things were organized and pristine. To her right, she noticed the kitchen too was nearly perfect. No overflowing trash, no dirty dishes. Just four pieces of Tupperware clean and drying.

Maura needed a pop culture reference that said she felt like she was in a completely different universe, but none came to her. Had it been a different situation she would have to ask Jane for help. Her slightly bewildered eyes came back to focus on Jane who was cross-armed watching her.

"I know you are upset, but I am too. I just don't have words right now for you Maura. I need a shower." Jane said matter of factly. She looked at Maura again and then turned to the shower. No argument, no jokes, no tone.

Maura Isles, the Chief Medical Examiner, Ms. Googlemouth herself, was dumbfounded. Literally at a loss for words. She set her purse on one of Jane's stools, took off her jacket, and then began to pace. She needed to sort through all of the weird events that just didn't feel real or in line with real over the past few hours. First, Jane didn't have time to eat last night so much so that she nearly faints at a crime scene. Then she let her help her without argument. And not only that, she thanked Maura. Not with a joke or a sarcastic remark, she thanked her. And then when that moment was ruined by Maura's phone ringing Maura figured she would find Jane had barricaded her apartment before Maura got there. Instead, the door was open, the apartment was cleaner than the first day Jane had it, and Jane was calm. Pissed, she could tell, but calm never the less.

And you know what, to add salt to the wound Maura had tried to get Jane to better organize this apartment at least a dozen times over the course of their friendship. You know to maximize the space, minimize the clutter. Jane would hear none of it. She'd say, "It's just who I am Maur" or "I don't have time for all of that." Or "it helps me filter out the keepers" meaning the people Jane would bring home.

Nope, the list did not make this any less weird. It did, however, help Maura form her first hypothesis. What was one thing new in Jane's life that Maura knew of? Derek. Jane had been distant and secretive about him. Could he possibly possess the ability to motivate Jane Rizzoli to de-clutter? Was he the cause of her calm even in the emotional overload?

Maura began to run her fingers along the back wall full of shelves. She walked these shelves many times waiting for Jane to wake in the morning or finish getting ready when Maura had to come over to wake Jane in the morning. She used to be able to tell what items each shelf held, but now they basically looked completely different. Most knickknacks had either been removed or organized. The few photos Jane had sticking out places were now in frames. One of Jane with her mother and brothers when Jane was in high school and named athlete of the year. Another of Jane and TJ at TJ's first birthday party. The third a photo of the gang - Korsak, Frost, Tommy, Jane, and herself at The Dirty Robber, their favorite bar.

Maura finished looking at the shelves, enjoying the knickknacks Jane had chosen to keep displayed and the stories behind them, but she also found herself hurting. One of her favorite things on the shelves prior to this revamp was, selfishly she admits, a picture Jane had kept of the two of them. It was of them dancing together at a Gala Maura dragged Jane along. The photographer had captured this perfect moment when Jane had swung Maura out during a slow dance Maura begged Jane to dance with her during. Maura was the center-left of the picture and mostly the focus, her face and shoulder taking up much of the frame of the picture. In the background, you can see Jane laughing and her fingers intertwined with Maura's. Jane had told Maura it was her favorite picture she owned. Maura had loved that picture, mostly she loved Jane's laugh and her eyes that seemed to be solely focused on Maura. There was something about the bliss of it all.

Maura knew it wasn't fair to be hurt that the picture was gone, but she was. She used to visit that picture every time she was over. It was the symbol of Jane as her sanctuary. No matter what Jane was steadily behind her, laughing when needed but always with their fingers intertwined. Maura took a deep breath, trying to fight back the tears. So many emotions were running through her and she couldn't keep up.

She forced her mission back at the forefront of her mind. Was Derek the root of Jane's change? She felt something rising in her chest at the possibility that all this change was his doing. Did he remove her picture with Jane? Or did he ask her to? Maura shook her head. These were not helpful or useful questions and they only fed the growing monster of emotion inside her.

Maura ventured over to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. Inside was strikingly clean and nearly empty. Three bottles of a six pack were still in the cardboard from Jane's favorite brewery. A larger metal container with 'Rizzoli' in Angela's handwriting (Jane's Mom) sat at the bottom. A bottle of Maura's favorite wine also sat in there, which caused Maura to smile wondering when Jane bought that. And then she noticed a Tupperware that match the other four in the strainer. It said 'Friday' on it. She pulled it out to find a chicken breast and lots of veggies in the container. As she was putting it back in the fridge she jumped at the sound of keys at the door.

Still holding onto the door, she leaned back to see past the fridge and watched Angela Rizzoli enter with groceries in hand.

"Maura!" Angela exclaimed. "I didn't expect to see you there! Can you get the door behind me please sweetie?"

Maura closed the door and then walked over to meet Angela at the counter.

"Oh I see Janie didn't eat her supper last night," Angela said looking down at the container still in Maura's hand. "I'm happy to see you Maura, but I'm surprised. I didn't know Janie would invite you over for this. Had I of known we could have driven together." Angela said as if whatever was happening was planned. Which, of course, just added to what was quickly becoming a large pile of question marks for Maura.

"We had a case early this morning. Jane got a little dizzy which I realized was due to dehydration and not enough nutrition. She was on a run when the case got called, so I drove her home afterward." Maura said matter of fact. Her brain was still trying to catch up with whatever alternative universe she had stopped into.

"Oh, that explains why Janie said she was running late. No matter, we can get started." Angela said as if Maura knew exactly what was going on.

"Jane's in the shower. I told her I wanted to make her something to eat but I realized there was no food in the fridge."

"Oh, that's sweet of you. We can make something extra with the groceries." Angela said unpacking the bags.

"Angela, was Jane expecting you today? I don't want to be in the way."

"Of course she was expecting me Maura and you are never in the way. Janie and I make her meals for the week on Saturday morning after her run. Well, I guess unless she has a case but then she still lets me come over and make them. I do prefer when she's here though, it's been a nice little ritual I suppose." Angela commented. It was then that it dawned on Angela that for the past nearly two months Maura had not been at Jane's apartment when she had been. And then wondered further, when was the last time Maura had been here? It was so natural for Angela to see Maura in her daughter's space that she had never taken pause to realize that despite how natural it felt, it was out of character for the past couple of months.

Angela knew Jane had been struggling and while she had not outright said it, she also knows Jane did not like Jack. Not one bit. Angela watched Jane encourage Maura to invest time into her relationship, but her mother senses told her Jane was holding back on how she really felt about the situation. Her guess was Jane was just being protective, but she trusted Jane's judgment of character over just about anyone else's so she too had become skeptical. Maura's voice cut off her train of thought.

"You make Jane's meals for her all on Saturday?" Maura questioned

"Yes. Jane kept not eating and getting dizzy spells. My goodness, I almost took her to the ER once when Vince called saying she passed out at the precinct gym. She's been working out so much and staying so active it reminds me of when she was a kid and couldn't sit still. Anyway, she told me she wouldn't eat because she didn't have time to make herself something. So she asked me if we could make dinners of her. Simple things she could heat up and ensure she had enough calories. It's real smart when you think about it."

It was really smart Maura thought. It used to be Maura would buy take out at least three times a week with Jane, the other times Maura would cook. Now that Maura thought about it she'd only shared three meals with Jane in the past two months - one of them with the entire team at the Dirty Robber and then other two at the traditional Sunday family dinner. And what did Angela mean Jane had been working out so much? Jane always ran three times a week and went to the gym once or twice a week. That was pretty standard.

"Wait. Angela." Maura said with concern and confusion. "Jane almost passed out at the prescient? Why didn't anyone call me" it was clear Maura felt hurt and defeated.

"Oh, sweetie. I can see you taking that the wrong way. You shouldn't at all. You were out of town. Remember that weekend you and Jack suddenly decided to take a weekend away? It happened then. Actually, I guess it happened the night after you left. No one meant to keep you out of it. Jane just didn't want us to bother you."

Maura remembered that weekend exactly.

 _The events that caused that weekend, however, happened on a Wednesday. They had just finished a particularly hard case involving a young girl. It had affected the entire time to the core. The group was heading to The Robber, their normal victory spot when Jane pulled Maura aside._

 _"Can I take you to dinner?" Jane asked softly._

 _Maura could tell the case was still running through Jane. The win of catching the bad guy had not yet overtaken the pain of what he had done. Maura also understood this was Jane being vulnerable, her way of asking for what she needed. And what she was saying is that she needed quiet time with Maura, a space where Jane could let all the walls around her down for an evening and feel safe. Maura savored these moments, not because she ever wanted Jane to hurt but because she knew these were moments reserved only for her. This part of Jane, this sacred piece of Jane, was hers and hers only._

 _Dinner was mostly small talk, but far after the food was complete and the wine bottle they shared was done the two of them just stayed. At times perfectly content letting the stillness sink in between them and other times one of them would speak about a piece of the case or anything really. Maura had replayed that evening a least a dozen times over in her mind. She had felt so connected to Jane, in a new way. Something new had snapped into place - something that didn't need to be named just simply acknowledge that it occurred._

 _When they got back to Maura's house she didn't want the evening to end. To be honest, she selfishly didn't want Jane's closeness to leave and her walls to return. She wanted to savor the togetherness. Maura had invited Jane in for a nightcap and in doing so watched as Jane literally ran her eyes up Maura's body and back again. Maura had always prided herself on her body - from the way she ate to her regular yoga sessions, to the way she dressed. Her image was important to her and she knew she looked good. This wasn't the first time she'd watched Jane look her up and down, it was always a nice compliment to be noticed by her best friend. But those times were always when they first saw each other potentially before an event or the morning at work. Not after they had spent 14 plus hours closing a case together and then dinner. It was as if Jane was seeing Maura for the first time that night. Admittedly, Maura loved it. She also enjoyed the fact that she caught Jane doing it and then Jane stood there very clearly unaware of the question Maura just asked._

 _Maura thought for sure Jane would come in, but she did not. She quickly dismissed the idea, claiming work for the reason, and turned away. Maura wished with every inch of her that Jane had stayed and was surprised how much it hurt to watch Jane walk away that night. When Maura shut the door she leaned her forehead against it for a moment, coping with the loss of Jane's presence. Jane had two glasses of wine, which is far below her tolerance. She also kept spare clothes in Maura's walk-in closest. She could have stayed if she wanted, without a problem, but she didn't._

 _Maura had walked to open the bottle of wine anyway. She needed a glass and a few moments to collect herself. She was sitting there thinking through the evening, enjoying again the soft touches of Jane's hand on hers or the way Jane listened to every word she said like it was the most important conversation of her life. She relished Jane's attention in that way. If they were together doing something, even shopping Jane's loathed enemy, Jane would always give Maura 100% of her attention. No one else existed. She was about to pick up her phone to text Jane, to thank her for the evening, when her doorbell rang._

 _Electric joy ran through Maura. Jane had changed her mind. She quickly pattered to the door, her heels had been removed while she poured herself wine. She swung open the door with a bright thousand watt smile on her face._

 _"Jack?" Her voice clear with confusion and disappointment_

 _"Uh, hi," He said leaning in to kiss Maura who turned her head at the last moment, his lips landing on her cheek. "You said you closed the case and always liked celebrating it. I thought I would surprise you."_

 _"I wish you would have called Jack. It's been a long day and besides you seemed to have forgotten a key part of what I said to you. I said the team liked to celebrate together." Maura remarked back. While Jack shut the door behind her, she hadn't moved them from the front entryway yet._

 _"Ah, so the team was sitting in your driveway when I arrived?" Jack spit back at her_

 _Maura was genuinely thrown by his statement, "I'm sorry what?" She replied unsure what Jack was implying._

 _"When I arrived Jane was sitting in her car in your driveway. The car wasn't on so I was surprised when I saw her in there. I knocked on the window and smiled to say hi. She looked shocked that I was there, which is pretty surprising since I'm your boyfriend. She just nodded at me and then started her car and pulled out of the driveway. It was pretty rude actually" Jack stated matter of factly with a layering of something Maura wasn't prepared to identify. "I mean why was she just sitting in your driveway, Maura?"_

 _Maura felt her chest get heavy. When she shut the door she had assumed Jane had left. Was Jane sitting right there the whole time, just feet from her front door? Why didn't she come back in? Did she feel the loss as well? Maura walked to her phone to text Jane with Jack right behind her into the kitchen. Maura was so distracted by this new piece of information she completely forgot Jack was with her, let alone that he had asked a question._

 _"Maura" Jack said grabbing her elbow. "I asked you a question." Maura turned around to face him slightly annoyed he was slowing her down._

 _"Why was Jane just sitting in your driveway?" He asked again. This time she placed the emotion. Jack was jealous, which felt quite silly._

 _"Jack, Jane is my best friend and colleague. We spend a lot of time together. Jane being in my driveway is nothing new or something that won't happen on a weekly basis. I don't understand why this is something of interest to you."_

 _"Stop it, Maura. I'm not asking you why Jane is using your driveway. I'm asking why Jane is sitting in your driveway, after you said you were celebrating with the team, at 11 o'clock at night. It seems a little late for visitors."_

 _"And yet here we are" Maura stated back. "You feel it's too late for visitors but you've shown up unannounced. I don't need to justify my whereabouts to you, Jack. This attitude is unbecoming of you. I celebrated tonight with Jane, which I'll remind you again, I have every right to do. Why she was sitting in my driveway still I cannot say simply because until you told me I did not know."_

 _Maura was fuming. Five minutes ago she was having a completely different night. Jack clearly was upset but Maura didn't have the energy for it._

 _"Ok Maura, I'm sorry. Me showing up like this was not helpful. And being jealous of Jane isn't either. You just seem to spend so much time at work and then when you aren't at work, you are with her. It's hard not to be jealous. I don't quite know where I fit in." Jack replied clearly defeated._

 _Maura's demeanor broke down after that. That was completely fair of Jack to say because simply put Maura had no idea where Jack fit in. He was easy to talk to, great on the eyes, and an adequate lover. She was always able to instruct him just right to make sure she found satisfaction as well. The reality was, however, that work would never stop. And she needed someone who understood that. If Jack couldn't this might not work out. But he deserved her attention while they invested in trying._

 _"Jack my job will not change. I will always have weird hours, unfortunately, murders don't really ask my input into their schedule." Maura attempted at a joke. Jack laughed. "But I will try to make sure we have more structured time together."_

 _Jack's eyes lite up. Apparently, she said the right thing. "Great! He said. "You aren't on call this weekend right?" He asked._

 _"That's correct" Maura stated realizing she needed to ask Jane if they were still on for their run on Saturday and was mentally adding that to the list of things to talk to Jane about tomorrow._

 _"And you just finished your active case, right?" Jack asked again._

 _"Yes, that's right," Maura commented back wondering where this was going._

 _"So if you don't get a new case in the next couple of days you actually could take the whole weekend off if you wanted to, right?" Jack asked again_

 _"Well yes, of course. If I don't get a new case and I'm not on call I wouldn't work Jack. Why are you asking me all these questions?"_

 _"Maura I want to go away this weekend. Just you and me. A romantic holiday for the two of us. Come on, what do you say?" He gave her the sweetest puppy dog eyes she'd ever seen. There really wasn't any reason to say no._

 _"Ok Jack, we can go"_

Maura shook the memory out of her head. "Wait is that why you left that note that Sunday dinner was canceled and for me not to fret if you were home late?" Maura asked putting two and two together.

"Yes," Angela said with a nod. "Janie was feeling really down and I decided I would rather spend the evening with just her. Though I suppose she was less than thrilled I did that."

Jane's bedroom door opened and she came stomping out, "Alright Maur I'm ready to talk." She said playing with a towel on her head to dry her hair. "Oh! Ma! You scared the shit out of me"

"Language Jane" Maura said out of reflex. Jane shot her a look.

"I don't know why I scared you, Janie, I came later just like you asked me," remarked Angela.

"Ma, 30 minutes later is not later. I meant like this afternoon." Jane huffed. Jane stared at the elder Rizzoli cutting up chicken to throw onto the stove and took a deep breath.

"What do you need to talk to Maura about anyway?" Angela remarked. "I won't get in the way. I'm helping too you know Jane."

"Ma don't act wounded. I forgot to eat last night. It was stupid and I felt a little funny at the crime scene. I think I made Maura nervous, I just wanted to explain and make sure she knew I was alright" Jane stated.

It wasn't totally false Maura thought. Part of that was true and while she found some relief in Angela irritating Jane (it was probably the first thing that felt normal today) she also noticed Jane trying to appease her mother's always erratic emotional responses.

"Janie you know what happens when you skip these meals. You either have to stop all these extra actives or you have to eat. You promised." Angela said pointing the knife at Jane because she didn't have a finger available.

Maura took stock of Jane in that moment. Dressed in a black tank top and black joggers Maura realized the growing definition in Jane's shoulders. As Jane moved the towel around her head once more to finish removing the excess water in her hair she saw her biceps flex and relax and flex again. Jane's collarbone was more defined as if any fat Jane may have had before (if any) had been removed. Maura cataloged two things running through her. Discomfort in a growing situation of unknowns about her best friend and that word again… longing. It was a repeat offender today. But this time, this time despite the fact it felt out of place, she could name it. Staring at Jane's defined jawline, running her eyes down her collarbone again, and then across strong shoulders, Maura felt something spark inside. Maura could feel the flush across her chest again watching Jane's muscular arms. She imagined the feel of them holding her close or what they would look like straddling on either side of her head.

Jane noticed Maura staring at her. She was able to even recognize the moment Maura recognized Jane was just a bit trimmer than maybe the last time Maura had seen her in any state of undressed. She shouldn't have enjoyed it, but she liked being the victim of Maura's gaze. If she didn't know any better she could have sworn there was a faint blush on Maura's chest. Which, by the way, was taking deep, noticeable, breaths. Jane, however, decided not to call it out. The morning has been too intense and she needed to distance herself from that time of interaction with Maura so she focused on her mother.

"I know Ma. Things ran late with Derek last night and after that, I don't…" she trailed off for a moment to find the words. "I guess I just needed to react in my own way. He just gets under my skin sometimes. So I went to the gym to hit the bag a little ya know? And, well, time got away from me. I was so exhausted when I got home I fell asleep on the couch. And this morning I just wanted to restart my routine so badly I didn't think. I just responded to the alarm and set off to run."

Maura had been shocked out of her little Jane daydream when she heard Derek's name. The mystery man himself. Things ran late? What does that mean? And are things not going well if he irritated Jane? And how late was Jane at the gym? And did Jane just say she set an alarm on a Saturday? All these questions were building their way up to Maura's vocal chords.

"He's good for you Janie. I'm glad you've been seeing him." Angela replied, taking all the wind out of Maura's questions. The tone of Angela's voice was soft, softer than Maura would have expected out of Angela.

"But you have to eat Jane. No excuses. I'm surprised Maura isn't all over you on this right now." Angela finished. Angela smiled at Maura, trying to engage the quiet medical examiner.

"Yes well Jane an increase in physical activity immediately demands an increase in proteins and clean carbohydrates, otherwise your calorie intake will not match the level at which your body burns." Maura retreated into facts as she felt smaller and smaller inside this new world Jane had begun building without her.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Thank you everyone for the follows, favorites, and comments! I am enjoying the community who loves these two women as much as I do. So much more of the story to go, I hope you are enjoying the journey with me!**

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Jane could see the discomfort on Maura's face, even if she wasn't able to identify why. She needed to continue to create distance between Maura and herself, for the sake of their friendship, but seeing Maura in any state of unhappy always moved Jane into action, regardless of her own worries or needs. Jane's fingers twitched with a desire to reach out and touch Maura - and fight as she might, the need was greater than the will to resist.

Jane walked up to Maura, who was leaning against the back of the couch facing the kitchen and cut off her mother's view from Maura's face. With Jane's back to Angela, she ran both her hands gently down Maura's arms and looked down at Maura's face who was staring at the floor. Jane would have backed off due to Maura's lack of engagement, but the goosebumps down Maura's arms shared a different, more responsive story than her face had given off. Jane softly touched Maura's chin with her fingers and titled Maura's head up to ensure they had eye contact.

Jane whispered so only Maura could hear, "Are you ok?"

"No," Maura said, her lip quivering as she held back tears. The entire day was filled with wave after wave of new information about the most important person in her life and it was overwhelming. Maura felt like an outsider again. A feeling Jane had once been the healer of, she now was causing.

"Jane you know we aren't ok. You can't just keep walking away from me. Look at this place. Look at you." she said as she once again ran her eyes over the rippling muscles of her best friend's upper body. "All this change and you won't let me anywhere near it."

"Maura" Jane said with concern in her eyes, but some determination in her soft tone. "That's not fair to say. You've had your life too. These changes didn't just happen overnight. They have been gradual over time. You haven't been around to notice them."

"You haven't let me notice them" Maura push back a little.

"Part of that is true Maur. I gave you space, but you didn't fight me on it either." Maura nodded sadly. Jane was right. While Maura had hated the distance, she also had suffered in silence. She had invested in Jack and in writing. She had done extra yoga classes and kept herself distracted in as many ways as possible. She wanted Jane to have time with Derek.

Jane could hear those wheels turning again in Maura's head. "Maur, right now my mom is literally right behind us. I can't start this conversation with you, with her right there. So let's make a deal. I'll answer two questions of the million that look to be swirling around in that head of yours right now. Straightforward, no funny business. And then after Ma leaves, if you aren't otherwise engaged because I know it's a Saturday, we can sit down and talk. What do you say?"

"Two questions huh?" Maura quipped and Jane smiled with her eyes at the question. Maura realized Jane was doing her best to break the mood and give them, both of them, the opportunity to talk later. Jane's finger ran across Maura's temple as she moved a curl from out around her face and tucked it neatly behind Maura's ear. On instinct alone, Maura closed her eyes at the touch. The gesture was just enough to settle Maura. The two questions that burned at the top of the rest were not the most rational, but Jane had promised and Maura didn't know if she could spend five more minutes in that apartment without asking.

"Where is our picture, Jane?" Maura asked.

Jane searched Maura's eyes. Of all the questions Maura could ask, that was the first, most important question that came to the top of Ms. Googlemouth's list? This again brought that feeling back to Jane. That feeling that she wasn't alone in feeling the tether between them, the string that bound them together in something deeper than just friendship. Jane decided to ensure this was actually part of Maura's two questions.

"Is this your first question Maura?" Jane asked and Maura nodded. "Ok then. Just to be clear, what picture are you asking me about?"

Maura's face immediately showed hurt and impatience at Jane's request to clarify. "Our picture Jane. The picture you said was your favorite picture you owned. The one that always sat right there." And despite how childish it probably looked to Jane, Maura pointed to where the picture had originally stuck out on the shelf.

"Mmm," Jane hummed back biting her lip. Her expression was guarded and unreadable to Maura which did not help Maura in the slightest. Jane stepped back from Maura removing the slight contact of their thighs and Jane's hand that had never left Maura's arm. Maura feared her irrational part of her brain had now made things worse.

Jane then turned to her mother, "Ma we'll be right back. I just need to talk to Maura about something" Jane then made eye contact again with Maura and extended her right arm in a welcoming posture, directing Maura down the hall to Jane's bedroom. Maura walked slowly preparing her arguments around the fact that Jane said she could ask any question. When she reached deep enough into Jane's bedroom room she turned around to confront Jane that she deserved an answer.

Her answer, however, was revealed to her without any words from Jane. Along the wall that shared space with the door of Jane's bedroom was her large vanity with a mirror stretched behind it. On top of the chest of drawers sat a few different sized candles on the left side and on the right side, angling in towards the bedroom was their picture sitting in a new frame. Jane hadn't gotten rid of it at all. She had framed it and moved it to space where it sat alone. A place Jane had once told Maura would only be reserved for a picture that really mattered to her.

 _They were laying in Jane's bed one night after spending their normal Friday evening eating takeout and drinking their beverages of choice. Maura staying over was not significant. Over the course of their friendship, they had probably spent a night together in one or the other's best once a month or at least once every other month._

 _"Jane you should really put some pictures up in your room" Maura had commented as she laid in bed waiting for Jane to finish in the bathroom._

 _"Maur I don't have the energy to go buy frames," Jane commented as she walked out._

 _"It doesn't have to be a lot. Maybe just a few. Like one over there on your dresser drawers. You don't need all that extra clutter all over the place. One solid frame, maybe of your family." Maura stated._

 _"Eww Maur I don't want their ugly mugs staring at me every morning." Jane joked. "It would have to be a picture of significance or someone significant for me to want to look at them every day. I mean come on, I'm not the nicest person in the morning. We don't want to take that out on the picture now, do we, Maur?"_

 _Maura laughed, but also remembered tucking that thought away to hold onto. Jane's jokes were almost always laced with truth._

Jane watched from the doorway as Maura walked towards the chest and reached for the frame, her profile still visible to Jane as she ran her thumbs along the top of the frame and down the sides. Jane could see an internal struggle happening inside of Maura. She kept her distance allowing Maura to have her own moment that was clearly needed. As Jane studied her, she wondered why Maura would ever think Jane would get rid of that picture. Had she put too much distance between them? So much so that Maura would think Jane wanted to remove her?

When a small tear starting rolling down Maura's face Jane couldn't keep her position anymore. She walked towards Maura and placed her hands on Maura's shoulders giving them a soft squeeze. Even with the few inches separating their bodies, Jane already felt her own reacting. Jane took in the smell of Maura's shampoo mixed with her perfume and just the simple undertones of vanilla that were distinctly Maura. Her beautiful hair laid softly down her back, some of it now dancing across Jane's hands on her shoulders. Despite running up three flights of stairs just a little while ago, her blouse was still perfectly tucked into her tight pencil skirt which Jane was sure she shouldn't be staring at, but she was. Jane started to feel her heart rate increase at their proximity. She wanted to comfort her friend, to be there for her, but she also wanted to spin her around, kiss her, and rip every perfect piece of clothing off of her body.

The internal struggle was enough to make Jane begin to pull away. As she did, however, Maura challenged her movements by leaning her head back to keep Jane's shoulder. So not to have Maura fall backward, Jane took a deep step into the space between them. Maura's back lightly touching Jane's chest and Jane took a deep breath at the contact. When Jane had reacted to Maura's desire to lean back her hands had quickly moved to Maura's waist to catch her.

Maura felt like she was on an emotional rollercoaster. First, all the changes around Jane were enough to make her want to curl up in bed and not leave for awhile. She knew there were a dozen more things she should be asking, should be understanding. The second was her deep reaction to both believing her picture had been removed to finding it here, in a space that held deep significance. Jane did very little without intention. Yes, she was brass and reactive and often times bull-headed. But things like this, things that took energy or effort, they were done with purpose. And then there was this longing. The longing that hadn't left since Jane's little hiccup with basic nutrition and dehydration earlier this morning. The longing that was coursing through her body right now, that she couldn't seem to control. When she felt Jane begin to pull away she couldn't bear it. She leaned her head back, knowing Jane would react to catch her and comfort her. It was probably the selfish thing to do, but the thought of not having Jane close right now was too much for Maura. What was more confusing was even with the back of her neck against Jane's shoulder and her back touching Jane's chest, she still didn't feel close enough. The internal confession alone was mind-boggling. Maybe she had really underplayed how much she missed her best friend.

What pulled Maura out of her thoughts was Jane's left thumb starting to draw slow circles on Maura's hip bone. Maura turned her head inward, towards Jane's neck to look up at Jane. Jane was staring straight ahead into the mirror above her chest of drawers, clearly focused on their reflection. Something in Maura craved Jane to keep watching her, to continue to have this undivided attention she hadn't had in nearly three months. She moved her head slightly closer to Jane and closed her eyes. Her breath ghosted across Jane's neck. The comforting smell of lavender and mahogany filled Maura's lungs, a mix that was always Jane. God, she missed her. The contact was comforting and tormenting all at once.

In an exhale Maura heard herself softly say, "God I've missed you". She never meant it to come out, not like that. She felt Jane take a sharp inhale behind her. Maura opened her eyes and looked back at the mirror again, watching as Jane cataloged each piece of her. Jane's eyes moved from Maura's face to her hair to down her body to where Jane's hands still sat on her hips. It was then that Maura began to question something for the first time that day. What was that emotion in Jane's eyes? She knew Jane had moved behind her because of the actions Maura took to make it happen. She had moved on instinct - Jane Rizzoli chivalry. She would never let Maura fall and Maura had banked on that. But now as she watched Jane's eyes watch her, she wondered… this need to have Jane close, is she feeling it too? It that… longing in Jane's eyes or am I just hoping to see it? Jane's eyes came back up to meet Maura's and the intensity in them made Maura shutter a little. Oh gosh, Maura thought, that just might be... longing.

"I've missed you too Maur" Jane replied back, never breaking eye contact in the mirror. Jane's normal rasp had dropped an octave and Maura was pretty sure she had never heard anything sexier in her entire life. Her body reacted without her consent as her hands covered Jane's on her hips and then moved them across her abdomen until she crossed them in front of her in an embrace. Maura watched Jane's eyes shut as the act of pulling Jane's arms around her also closed the gap between their bodies. Jane was molded along Maura's back and it clearly had an effect on Jane. Jane had not yet opened her eyes, but Maura watched as Jane worked to catch her breath.

Jane was pretty sure she was going to die from trying to hold her breath. Her hands burned with the touch of Maura running them across the silk of Maura's blouse and the tight stomach just beneath. And then Maura's ass had pressed itself into Jane's crotch which caused electric currents to shock through her system and blood to continue to run south. Jane was desperately trying to hold onto some reserve, but Maura was testing her in ways Jane never imagined. They had always been close, always pressing the buttons of what a conventional friendship was allowed to be. Jane had never minded the blurry lines. Well, not until she realized she didn't want any lines at all. Realizing she had fallen in love with Maura had changed everything.

That was why she had created distance between Maura and herself. She realized that every time the blurriness would show up that Maura would assume, as she had every right to do, that it was just part of their closeness but Jane would know she wanted it to be more. Jane knew that every touch now meant something more to her and in this moment it was no different. Maura was hurting and thrown off by the changes Jane was making and she wanted comfort as her brain tried to sort through it. Jane knew this and tried to calm herself down, but it was growing impossible. Maura's smell. Maura's breath on her neck. Maura's hands pressing her own into Maura's body just below her breasts. Maura's perfect curves pressed against her. God, Maura's ass radiating heat into her crotch. She closed her eyes trying desperately to compose herself. She wanted to freeze this moment and hold onto it. She was also aware that it would be best if she removed herself from Maura. Her body's reaction was too much and it wasn't fair to her best friend.

Right as Jane was about to remove herself, having finally talked herself into it, she felt Maura nuzzle deeper into her neck. A small whimper escaped Jane before she could take it back. Maura's forehead, nose, and lips were all lightly touching the skin of Jane's neck. Jane couldn't take it anymore. Every time she tried to fan down the flames setting off inside her Maura would push further.

Maura had watched Jane's jaw set, she knew at any moment Jane was going to pull herself away, but Maura wasn't ready. She understood they needed to talk, she even knew she needed to sort herself out. She should remove herself from Jane's embrace, but the longing was too much. The distance had been too much. All the rational parts of Maura's brain was clouded by a desire to remain at the center of Jane's attention. Fearing Jane would pull away, Maura nuzzled deeper into Jane's neck. The small whimper that vibrated against her lips from Jane's throat lit an explosion inside Maura. It was as if every nerve ending in her entire body reacted to the sound. Again, a simple moment with Jane had easily solicited an intense reaction from Maura's body. An incomparable reaction Maura admitted to herself.

As Maura engulfed herself in Jane's smell and Jane's pulse radiating from her neck Maura finally allowed the truth to surface inside her. This reaction wasn't longing for attention from her best friend. No, these reactions were romantic reactions, they were sexual responses to Jane's presence. She didn't simply want Jane's attention, she wanted to be the only one who received it. She wanted Jane. Maura let her body's need lead her and with her eyes closed tight she moved her lips against Jane's neck.

Eleven. Ten. Nine. Jane was counting down from thirty. She was going to take a deep breath and get control of this situation. Every fiber of her craved more. She wanted to run her hands across every curve of Maura's body. She wanted to taste her skin, inch by inch. Slowly, though, she was calming herself down. By some grace in the universe, Jane was getting the blood flowing back into her brain, instead of only south. She was steadying her breathing. She was going to slowly separate them, her mother was waiting just outside this room for heaven sake. And she needed to put some respectable distance between their bodies because otherwise, Jane was going to do something that would all but ruin their friendship.

Four. Three. Two. And then Maura's lips moved along Jane's neck. The first time Jane froze completely, sure that Maura had just shifted and by accident had grazed her lips across Jane's pulse point. But when Maura's lips kissed her a second time Jane's eyes shot open and up to stare at the mirror. She watched (and felt) as Maura's body shifted slightly to softly planted yet another kiss on her neck. And that was Jane's undoing. Jane's hips jerked forward slightly rolling into Maura's ass. Jane's hands added pressure to Maura's ribcage where they had been gently sitting under Maura's hands. Maura loosened her grip and Jane took that as permission to keep moving. She ran her hands in opposite directions along Maura's bra line and then down her sides.

Once Jane's hands gripped Maura's hips again she rolled them once more into Maura. This time Maura pressed back into her. The added pressure their connection made put Jane nearly through the roof. Jane's reserve tank was empty. She looked into the mirror to find Maura watching her. The flush across Maura's chest and the heaving of her breasts as she tried to catch her breath was intoxicating to Jane. She kept eye contact with Maura as she lowered her lips to along the profile of Maura's face. She ran her tongue up the line of Maura's ear and was rewarded with a small whimper from Maura's mouth. This was better than Jane had ever imagined. The hazel of Maura's eyes had been replaced with a drunken darkness of desire. It felt powerful to know how responsive Maura was by the simplest of her touches. Keeping eye contact with Maura who was clearly enjoying watching her, Jane whispered, "Turn around"

Maura couldn't believe the power of Jane's touch. Every single fiber of her being was alive. The rasp in Jane's voice echoed through her as she asked her to turn around. Keeping the little composure she had left, Maura held herself back from just spinning around with the eagerness she felt inside. Instead, she slowly moved her ass across Jane's core, then her hip bone as she pivoted, and then creating a sliver of space between them as she faced Jane per her requested. Maura ran her eyes up from Jane's hands back on her hips, to the veins in Jane's forearms that ran all the way up into her biceps and then the perfectly defined shoulder blades. Jane had always been attractive. Always well defined and in shape. But now with this new workout regiment and Maura's deeply aroused awareness of it, Maura was pretty sure she'd never be able to look at Jane in a tank top again without wanting to rip it off like she wanted to right now.

When she reached Jane's eyes they were no longer black with desire, they were deeper. Primal. Maura felt her panties become wet in response to it. "Oh God Jane." She panted. And that's when Jane broke the space between them.

Jane quickly moved her left hand from Maura's hip and wrapped it around the back of Maura's neck as she ran her right hand around to pressed into the small of Maura's back - the act pressing their centers together. Jane tilted Maura's head up and brought her lips down to meet those soft pink ones she'd be fantasying about for the past three months. At the first touch of their lips, Jane's entire body went on fire. The hunger it set off was not something Jane was going to be able to control. Whatever line she had tried not to cross she just demolished. Maura immediately responded by kissing her back. Jane ran her tongue along Maura's upper lip just like she had done to Maura's ear. Maura's mouth opened inviting Jane in and she needed no other nudging. Jane slipped her tongue inside Maura's mouth, moaning at the taste.

Jane's moan was Maura's new addiction. God let her never stop moaning. Maura needed more. She needed Jane closer. She couldn't take it, she couldn't stop herself. She had never felt such a physical reaction to someone's want of her. Someone's touch. This kiss… this kiss was everything. She was done. Sold. Jane Rizzoli had to be hers. Maura reached up and wrapped her fingers in Jane's hair, pulling her deeper into the kiss.

"Janie!" Angela Rizzoli shouted from the kitchen. Reality shook both women as they pulled apart panting. Jane took another step away from Maura, not trusting herself to keep them separated.

"Shit" Jane said in heated breath still.

"Language Jane" Maura whispered still clearly unable to catch her breath

Jane shot her a 'really right now' look at Maura and then yelled to her mother, "Ya Ma?"

"Derek keeps calling you, do you want me to answer it?" Angela shouted.

Maura immediately went stiff. Jane had a Derek, Maura had a Jack. This, between them, was simple and electric but there were people outside of them. And one of them was pulling Jane away from Maura right now. Maura then thought of Jack and without thinking said out loud, "Oh no, Jack" and put her fingers to her lips where Jane's kiss still tingled.

At the sound of Jack's name, Jane's forehead furrowed and she took yet another step back from Maura. "This is my fault, Maura. I'm sorry. I really am"

"Janie, Korsak is calling now," Angela shouted.

"I'm comin' Ma" Jane shouted and began to jog out of the room.

"Rizzoli" Jane answered her phone.

"Hey Jane, we have another body. You're going to want to get down here right away." Korsak stated.

"Ok Korsak, where are you at?" Jane listened as Korsak gave her the address. "Oh God, is Derek ok?"

Maura came into the kitchen as she heard Jane asking Korsak about Derek. She wanted to listen and comfort Jane. She also wanted to run to the bathroom and throw-up. The thought of someone else touching Jane now was just too much. This had been the most intense day of Maura's life and from the sounds of it, it was far from over.

"Ok Korsak, thanks for the heads up" Jane commented. Maura watched her, trying to read Jane's body language along with her words to understand what was going on. "Actually no need to call her. She's right here with me." Jane looked over and softly nodded at Maura. Maura understood. Maura began to put her jacket on as Jane finished her call.

When Jane hung up she looked at her mom who was clearly worried. "I can't say much right now Ma. Korsak needs Maura and I right away. But Derek is ok. I'll tell you what I can later, ok?" Angela nodded.

Jane then turned to Maura, "I'm sorry Maur. I need to change before we go, I'd rather be a little more put together than this morning. You don't have to wait for me if you don't want to. I already have Korsak on the scene and I know you'll want to get to the body."

Maura was reeling. She'd gone through so many emotions already today, ending with literally the best kiss of her entire life with her best friend, while they both were still dating someone else. Not to mention, from the sounds of it, she was about to come face to face with the mystery man she never was allowed to meet. She needed a few minutes to compose herself before shifting into Dr. Isles.

"Ok, Jane. I think I'll go ahead. Will you text me the address as I walk down?" Something flashed across Jane's face but Maura was unable to place it quick enough before it disappeared and Jane rolled her shoulders back.

"Of course Maura, I'll do that right now. See you in a few." Jane commented, grabbed her phone, and then turned around to her bedroom without another word.

Maura nodded to Angela who smiled at her and then walked down the stairs. She heard her phone ding in her purse indicating the address was now available to her in her text messages. With each step, she switched between thinking about Jane's lips on hers to who the hell Derek was. The adult in her knew she shouldn't, but as soon as she made it to the bottom step, even before leaving Jane's building, she pulled out her phone.

M: Who is Derek, Jane?

She walked to her car, plugged the address Jane had given her into her GPS, and headed out. The drive was only ten minutes away. Maura had ten minutes to get her head together, but all she could think about was waiting for Jane's response. Right before she was about to pull out onto the road she heard her phone ding again.

J: Why is this your second question?

M: Because I need to know who he is Jane. I can't stop thinking about it.

J: I already told you who he is Maur.

"AHHH" Maur nearly screamed. She threw her phone back into her purse and pulled into the street. Why now, moments away from Maura meeting this man first the first time, was Jane still not give Maura a straight answer? Jane Rizzoli was going to get an ear full about this later.

Maura took the drive to try to push her anger and confusion around Jane from her mind. She had to be Dr. Isles when she stepped out of that car. She knew that was the only way she was going to get through this. When she pulled up to the plush house she noticed both Korsak and Frost's cars already there. About four other squad car lights were flashing and she was sure she had just beat the media with all this attention. She leaned back to grab her kit and took a deep breath thinking about Jane sitting in the passenger seat when she put it there only hours earlier. What an intense day.

Maura walked into the house to find a very shaken up, very handsome man talking to Korsak. She recognized him right away as the man Jane had been talking to at the coffee shop that day. Korsak noticed her first and turned to greet her.

"Hello, Dr. Isles." Korsak greeted.

"Good afternoon Sergent." Maura greeted her professionalism perfectly in place.

"This is Dr. Derek Jacobson" Maura nodded her acknowledgment and Korsak continued. "This is his home. He runs his practice out of here. The body is down the hall in his office, but he has begged us to wait for Jane."

Maura tried to consume the information, "I assure you, Dr. Jacobson, I am a professional and I will not do anything but respect the body as we wait for Detective Rizzoli to arrive."

"Maura" Derek started, then corrected himself once he realized what he had done. "I'm sorry I mean Dr. Isles. I apologize, that was incredibly unprofessional. I don't mean to in any way claim you can't do your job. Jane has spoken so highly of your work I wonder if anyone else will compare." If he meant to flatter her, it was working. She had not shifted her opinion but he at least got her attention. "I'm afraid what I'm saying is that I believe this crime scene was meant for Jane."

Derek works startled Maura. Why was this for Jane? What did he mean? And why was Dr. Jacobson so calm? A lover wouldn't be so calm, they would be frantic. Heavens, she felt frantic even while she tried to remain professional. None of the emotional worries Maura was now feeling around Jane presented itself in any way in Derek's face.

"Dr. Jacobson, what is your relationship with Detective Rizzoli?" Maura asked.

"Maura" she heard Jane's voice behind her. Jane then lowered her voice as she entered the small circle of people gathered together, Frost coming to her left. "I've already explained this to you. He's my therapist."

"Oh," Maura said realizing all this time Jane had been serious. Derek at 7pm wasn't a weekly date, it was an appointment.

Derrek watched Maura come to understand what was happening. "I know it's unconventional to have Jane call me by my first name but when I started with a more clinical approach Jane really wasn't comfortable. I switched methods in order to help her open up."

Jane clearly was uncomfortable with everyone in the home of her therapist. She kept shifting from side to side.

"Ok, walk us through this," she said to Derek.

"I was in my office with my last appointment of the night last night when three men, masked, broke down the door. Everything happened quickly. They shouted and ambushed me. I remember very little before they knocked me over the head and I blacked out. Jane, it's what I woke up to that you need to see."

"So this happened last night?" Jane questioned.

"Yes. As soon as I woke up to what's in there and Nicole's body, I called you. I called you three times before I called the station and got in touch with Sergent Korsak." Derek replied.

Korsak put his hand on Jane's shoulder, "Let's go in Rizzoli. We can't let this crime scene sit. Dr. Isles needs to see the body and we need to collect evidence."

Jane led Korsak and Maura into the room with her. Frost stayed back with Derrek. Maura noted Jane's immediate reaction. Her shoulders squaring, her eyes frantically eyeing the room. Maura looked around, and besides the poor woman laying on the couch clearly deceased due to the amount of blood loss and decay smell in the room, the office simply looked like an office. Whatever Jane saw was not obvious to Maura.

Korsak spoke first, "Jane it just looks like an office to me. I mean of course besides our vic here. Fill me in. What's going on"

Jane was clearly rattled by something took a deep breath and then she spoke.

"Korsak, you remember Dr. Patterson?" Jane questioned. Maura recognized the name.

"Ya, of course, Jane, you know I do. He was your therapist after Hoyt. Hell, he worked with all of us during a few different cases where officers were injured. Why Jane?" Korsak asked.

"Korsak I need you to focus with me for a minute. I want you to close your eyes and remember what that office looked like. I want you to pull as many details as you can forward and then I want you to look around this room again."

Maura watched as Korsak did so and when he opened his eyes his face began to match Jane's. That was when Jane began to explain herself more.

"This is fresh paint." Jane touched the ugly mustard color with her gloved hand and was able to make a smear. "Derek's office walls have always been blue. The couch we are facing now is normally there on the opposite wall. His bookshelf was white, a complimentary color to the wall. These have been painted brown and moved." Jane spun around once or twice more. "In fact, this entire office has been changed around to mirror, as best as possible, Dr. Patterson's"

"Jane, how would Derek know that this matched Dr. Patternson's office?" Maura asked her quietly. Maura had to admit, she was rattled.

"Because I told him. In one of my sessions. I told him I couldn't talk for a long time to Dr. Patterson after Hoyt. It was hard for me to open up, you guys know that. I still don't really talk about it. So instead, I would spend the hour memorizing different ugly details of Patterson's office."

As Jane and Korsak continued to look around the room, Maura made her way to the body. Jane watched as Maura kept tilting her head back and forth. Looking at the body from different angles. Again and again and again.

"Jane" Maura spoke directly "Could you ask Derek and Forst to come in here?"

Jane nodded and waved them in.

"Derek I'm sorry to ask this of you but I'm going to need you to look Nicole with me for a moment," Maura said, some sympathy in her voice.

"Ok" Derek said softly. He professionalism she showed outside the room slightly rattled again by the presence of the deceased.

"Derek, is this what Nicole was wearing when she came in for her session last night?" Maura asked.

Derek's face showed surprised as he looked down at Nicole. "No, it wasn't. She had on jeans and sweatshirt. I don't think I've ever seen Nicole in heels. I'm sorry I didn't realize that before."

Maura nodded. "I suspected as much, but thank you for confirming." Maura then turned and looked at Jane. "Jane these clothes are high-end designer. I can also tell you the clothes were put on post modem. The stab wounds just underneath are what caused her to bleed out but there are no cuts in this shirt or blood on the top where it could be helped. These clothes were very carefully put on the body."

"So the Killer wanted us to see these" Korsak added.

Maura nodded.

Frost walked Derek out and waved the rest of Maura's team in. The group was collectively gathering evidence when Jane's voice broke out near the desk, "Shit".

"What's going on Jane?" Korsak asked.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: Just a heads up that there is a lot going on in this chapter. Setting things up for some upcoming events :) .** **I'm already into the next chapter and it should be up tomorrow (fingers crossed). Please keep following! If people keep reading, I'll keep writing.**

* * *

Jane pulled out a folder from the drawer and threw it onto the desk. It was thick, from the outside it looked like it held detailed records from Derek on a patient. Maura's team was in the process of removing the body, so she was standing back observing at the time of Jane's outburst. She joined Korsak as he walked to the desk to meet Jane.

Jane shouted over them as well in the direction of the hallway, "Frost get in here"

Maura noticed Jane's name written on the file folder and looked at Jane with permission to open it. What the folder showed was not what Maura expected and she was unable to hold back her gasp. The folder was filled with hundreds of photos of Jane. Maura kept pulling them away picture after picture. Jane running. Jane entering her apartment. Jane outside the precinct. Jane standing with a woman Maura didn't recognize. Jane having dinner with the same woman. Jane snapped the folder shut in frustration.

"Jane" Frost spoke out first. "Do you think this has anything to do with…."

"I'm not sure yet Frost. None of this has this seems to have their signature, but I'll admit I'm worried." Jane spoke back. It was clear Frost knew something the others didn't.

Jane saw Maura about to ask her a question and cut her off. "Not here."

The sharpness of Jane's voice immediately upset Maura, but Jane clearly suspected something she hadn't communicated to the rest of the group yet.

"Dr. Isles I'll explain what I'm thinking but I need a little patience here," Jane commented not even looking at Maura. Why had Jane pivoted to professional names? Something was off.

"Frost, do you have a black light?" Jane asked. The look on Frost's face said that he again understood something that no one else did. It was clear Jane wasn't ready to express where her brain was going. A few minutes later Frost handed Jane the black light. Jane turned it on and faced the couch where Nicole's body once laid.

"Hit the lights" Jane instructed.

When the lights went off Jane's blood went cold. She was right. Frost was right. They had feared that this had something to do with the cold case they had been chasing the past three months, one that never sat well with Jane that she didn't close. She had needed something to distract her mind, not just her body. And this was exactly their MO.

Words spread across the wall for the group to see.

"Hello, Detective Rizzoli. If you would have let things lie, this poor girl wouldn't have had to die."

"Jane what's it written in, can you tell?" Korsak asked.

"I can't tell, but I don't need to guess," Jane said with her head dropped. Frost had turned off the lights and Jane had yet to look at any of them.

Frost taking over, "its semen."

"Hit the lights Frost" Korsak ordered. When the lights came back on he turned to Jane who looked serious, but nervous. He was about to ask Jane a question when she communicated to him not to speak with a finger in front of her lips.

"Frost we need to sweep this room for bugs. Everyone else let's meet outside." Jane said

When all four of them were in front, Korsak grabbed Jane by the elbow. "Ok, Jane you need to start talking. My alarm bells are going off here and I need to understand what we are working with."

Jane faced all of them, clearly uncomfortable and nervous. "Frost and I have been looking at a cold case in our spare time. Chewing on it. Trying to look at the evidence in different ways. It's just never sat well with me. The thing is we never re-interviewed people. In fact, we didn't even put it on a murder board. No one knew we were doing it."

"Except we did check out the old evidence box," Frost said.

"Exactly," said Jane. "So for someone to be aware we were doing this…" Jane let it sit for a second to let everyone get on the same wavelength as her. Maura's eyes went wide and Korsak shifted in closer to Jane.

"Are you saying someone from the precinct is somehow involved in this?" He asked not threatening, but communicating to Jane he wanted her to think about the words she was going to say.

"Korsak it's the only thing that makes sense. How would someone even know we were looking into it? We didn't even tell you. And how else would they know some of the intense details of Patterson's office?"

"Jane" Maura spoke. Her voice did not disguise her fear of what this could mean. This was a personal attack on Jane and they had no idea to what level this threat went. "What about the body? I have to examine it at the precinct."

Jane broke the harsh character she had been playing in the room now that they were outside and crossed the circle the group had created to speak directly to Maura. "Maur we can't break too far out of our pattern. You'll still do the body as per your normal routine. But, I don't feel comfortable not keeping you close by right now. If it's ok with you, we will set up our murder board and war room in your office."

"Of course," Maura said. Admittedly, she felt better knowing the team would be nearby. More so she wanted to be able to keep Jane close. They had been through so much and now Jane was being targeted for something she didn't quite understand yet.

* * *

Normally when exiting a crime scene Jane's impatience would get the best of her and she would easily be the first back at their desks, starting the murder board. This time, however, she was still sitting in her car when Maura was pulling out. Frost and Korsak had gone out ahead of them a few minutes before. When Maura noticed Jane didn't follow her when she pulled out onto the road she got nervous and called Jane.

"Hey Maur" Jane said clearly still deep in thought.

"Jane, why haven't you left yet? We need to get started, I don't like you still sitting there." Maura's voice shaken with nerves. Now that she was safely tucked away in her car, she no longer had to play the calmer, cooler Dr. Isles.

"Hey Maur, no no don't go there. Take a breath." Jane waited to hear Maura breath. "I'm just sitting here thinking something isn't adding up. I know I need to share this case with the rest of you still, but even with that something still feels off."

"Walk me through it, Jane. I know you need to talk things out. Or better yet come back to the precinct with the rest of us, let's talk it out together. You can have me on speaker while I start opening up Nicole." Maura waited a few minutes for Jane to respond, when she didn't she nudged again. "Jane talk to me"

"Maura I'm sorry we didn't get to talk," Jane said. "I'm sorry for a lot of things like that. I'm sorry I'm not as brave as you think I am, but I'm going to make this right."

Maura was no detective, but she knew Jane. These words to her were frightening. "Jane please stop. This case isn't your fault and us getting pulled away isn't your fault. Please tell me you are on your way now. We all work best as a team. Let's get started."

"I've driving Maur, stop fretting. I'm only a few minutes behind you." Jane said. "But, Maur just listen for a second, this is important."

"Ok Jane" Maura said as she stepped out of the car in the garage. She was worried she'd lose reception if she took the elevator so she took the stairs.

Jane could hear the clicking of Maura's heels in the background and found herself smiling at the realization of what Maura hand done so not to disrupt the call. "Maura I.." Jane was cut off when a car slammed into her cruiser, t-boning her in an intersection. Her phone remained connected to the call, having sat on speakerphone while she was talking to Maura.

Maura heard the loud crunching sound and started yelling Jane's name as she was walking into the lobby of the precinct. Korsak and Frost standing in the cafe near the entrance came walking towards her. "Jane what's going on." Maura cried out. "Jane answer me. Please answer me"

"Maur" Jane sounded really far away and groggy. "Maur tell Frankie to show you…." And again Jane was cut off by loud noises. Maura could hear voices

"Grab her and check her pulse" Male voice one said

"I'm going as fast as I can," Male voice two said

"We have twenty more seconds before the sirens get here" Male voice one said. "She better not be dead, he wants her alive. I'll kill you myself if she's dead"

Maura was crying. Frost had taken Maura's phone and was recording it with his own. They heard scraping and then footsteps running away. Korsak had run to the front desk and was on the radio calling units to the stretch of road they had taken back from the crime scene. They could hear a car peel off through the cell phone and then moments later hear sirens coming through. Everyone in the lobby stood still knowing the next couple seconds going to determine more than they may be ready to cope with. The crackle of the radio in Korsak's hand nearly echoed as everyone, officers surrounding them included, stood still.

"We've got her." crackled an officer over the radio. "Detective Rizzoli is being extracted from her vehicle. Korsak, she's alive, but she's pretty beat up. We are transporting her to Mass Gen."

Jane's alive.

Maura exhaled. Without thinking she was headed towards the elevator to the garage. She was going to Mass General.

"Where are you going, Maura?" Frost asked.

"Jane, I have to get to Jane," Maura said not even looking back.

"Obviously Maura. We all are going. Come on I'm parked out front, we are going sirens blazing." Frost said, grabbing Maura's elbow to turn her around and get moving.

* * *

Maura sat staring at the cold cup of coffee in her hand wondering how one day could hold so much. Jane had sustained a pretty severe blow to the head when the car T-boned her. Swelling of the brain was Maura's biggest concern. The bruises and bumps Jane endured were not pretty to look at, but most were superficial.

She looked up at Jane again, laying there, not yet stirred or conscious. Around the room, Korsak, Angela, and Frankie were gathered. Frost and a few detectives they trusted from another team were working on sorting and putting together the evidence they had collected prior to the accident. Maura was lost in thought until she heard a nurse entered the room.

"Dr. Isles?" The nurse questioned, clearly not sure who was who in the room.

"Yes?" Maura said a little surprised.

When the nurse noticed Maura had perked up and answered her, she circled around Jane's bed towards her. Everyone's eyes were on Maura as well.

"The doctor will be in shortly. With an officer down in the line of duty, there is a strict protocol we follow."

"Yes, I know. The protocol states the hospital keeps a blue file on every officer and detective from the Boston Police Department. These files are paper only, locked under two sets of keys in a fireproof safe to prevent anyone hacking them. They are also moved at various times, without scheduling." Maura stated. Realizing even in this small moment, when she was rambling out facts due to her nervous, how much she needed Jane.

"Correct Dr. Isles. It's also protocol for us to pull that file if an officer enters General Mass unconscious. We want to ensure their wishes and needs are met precisely." The nurse looked Maura in the eyes before she extended her arm with the blue file in hand.

"I'm happy to help Mrs. Rizzoli" Maura nodded towards Jane's mother before she continued, "To understand anything within the file, but it may be best to at least let her look at it before we continue."

"That is your decision entirely Dr. Isles. However, from the looks of the file Detective Rizzoli is a very private person. She has chosen to have very limited information within the file itself." When Maura tilted her head at the nurse, the nurse realized she may need to be a little more clear so she continued. "You are Detective Rizzoli's medical proxy, Dr. Isles."

"Oh," Maura said reaching for the file. She just stared at the top of it, with Jane's name and badge number on it.

"Are you sure?" Angela spoke out into the room as if the nurse got it wrong.

Frankie's voice surprised everyone when he spoke before the nurse could. "She's sure ma. I know Janie changed Maura to her proxy, I was with her when she dropped off her updated files here to Mass Gen last year."

"What?" Angela said in disbelief. Maura felt the same but was glad Angela voiced it. The nurse softly excused herself as the conversation continued without her.

"Ma, it's no big deal. It's pretty standard for us to review our folders. It's not morbid or anything. We just know there is risk that comes along with the job. After the shooting. You know where Jane and I both got hurt, well um." Frankie started to sweat a little under the scrutiny of Angela and Maura. He knew bringing this up was risky but he wanted to defend Jane's decisions. "Well, Janie and I both sat together in my apartment and talked through our paperwork. Something changed in Jane after that, we all saw it right?" Maura nodded, Angela just kept starting. "Well anyway, it didn't sit well with Jane that Maura couldn't get to her without permission from someone. Jane felt that out of anyone in the world, Maura should have been there. She's a doctor, but she's also the only person who really knows Jane."

"That's not fair Frankie." Angela pouted, feeling dejected by her daughter who wasn't even conscious.

"Ma I'm not saying if it's fair or not, but it's the truth. Jane made a few changes after that and made me promise never to tell anyone unless Maura was handed that folder right there." Frankie said pointing to Maura.

"What are you talking…." Maura started to question Frankie but was cut off when the Doctor entered the room.

"Dr. Isles?" He questioned clearly looking at Jane's chart.

Maura stood, running her hands down the crinkles of her skirt, and morphed into Dr. Isles as best she could.

"That's me." She extended a hand to the doctor trying to impose some form of authority and equality. "Dr. Maura Isles."

"Dr. Knowles, nice to meet you, Dr. Isles. I'm sorry it's under these conditions." When Maura nodded to him he continued. "After assessing Jane's injuries, I called for a CT and an MRI just to be safe. The CT has already come back and we are seeing a hematoma on the left frontal lobe, which is where the most impact occurred in the accident."

"Will you be trying diuretics or does surgery need to occur?" Maura asked, her voice steady as she understood this is what Jane needed.

"Unless the MRI shows me something different, I would like to do a round of diuretics and keep Jane in an induced coma for the next 24 hrs. Her brain activity is strong, but I'm worried if she becomes conscious and then wants to be active we may irritate the healing before it's even started."

Everyone was watching Maura, clearly unsure what was happening but when relief swept some of the coldness of her Dr. Isles persona away the room relaxed as well.

"Oh thank God," Maura said clearly unable to help herself. "That sounds good, thank you, doctor."

The doctor nodded and left Maura to the family.

"What does all that mean Maura?" Angela asked.

"Jane has had some bleeding and swelling in her brain. While the bleeding is controlled now, the doctors are going to give her some medication to help with the swelling. They are also going to keep her unconscious for the next 24 hrs for her safety. I think with this case and how worked up Jane could get, that's the safest option."

"So she's going to be ok?" Frankie asked.

"Yes, she's going to be ok." Maura stated back.

Relief settled itself in the room. Everyone was breathing away, but that also meant everyone's attention was back on how to catch whoever did this.

"I don't mean to sound insensitive but I think that means I better not let Jane down and get back to work." Korsak said. "We should get back to help Frost, but first we need to go through a few things here as a team. Frankie, do you mind closing the door?"

As Frankie closed the door, Korsak continued. "It's clear that whoever is behind this knows a lot about Jane. And while I know Jane is a very private person the only way to protect her and catch this guy is to learn what he knows." Everyone looked at Korsak with discomfort. "We will need to treat Jane's life like we would treat any other potential victim. We are going to have to comb through everything which means this might get uncomfortable. We will do this respectfully and as carefully as possible."

"Uh Korsak I'm not happy about this, but I agree completely. But don't you think we should wait and not talk about this in front of Ma?" Frankie said.

"It's my baby, I am part of this" Angela snapped out.

"Calm down everyone. I'm telling as much as I need to tell to Angela right now. Angela, we are going into a lockdown protocol which means no one except the two nurses we've screen and Jane's doctor enters the room. I've triple screen five officers to also help guard. We cannot be too careful. Frost, Frankie, and I will take turns sitting in here with you."

"I'm not leaving Jane," Maura stated when she realized her name wasn't mentioned.

"I'm afraid I have to ask something very hard of you Maura." Korsak continued. "You are our biggest asset right now. I know you and Jane haven't been as close the past couple months, but you know Jane better than any of us. She trusts you enough to be her proxy. We need you back at the station helping. You said it yourself Jane is going to be ok. We need your help catching this guy. We will make sure you get the opportunity to come back and check in, but I need you with us right now."

Tears fought Maura's eyes. He was right and she wanted to help, but it hurt inside thinking about leaving Jane's side. Maura unable to help herself walked back over to Jane and softly ran her hand along Jane's cheek. She then left a soft kiss on the side of Jane's temple. While the room was bustling to get their plan organized, not a single person in the room missed the moment.

"Ok, Maura we should go" Korsak stated.

"Tommy will be here within the hour."

"Frankie I'll come back to switch with you in about an hour. Under no circumstances do I want Jane and Angela not with Frost, yourself, and me. Understood?" Korsak stated back. He felt panic over even one piece falling out of place. He knew Jane wasn't safe unless they were perfection in their execution of this strategy.

"You don't have to tell me, Korsak. This is my family you are talking about." Frankie said, clearly offended and defensive. Everyone's emotions were under attack.

"Mine too kid, mine too," Korsak said softly. He then gently coaxed Maura out with them and then they headed out. It was time to catch this son of a bitch.

* * *

Maura and Korsak didn't speak on their way to meet Frost. Maura figured Korsak was working things out for himself and that was just fine with her. The evening had fallen on Boston and while it was still Saturday, it felt like weeks had passed by. So much had happened that Maura wasn't really sure where to start. Maura touched her lips and closed her eyes, pulling forward the feeling of Jane all over her. She had never felt that way before and her declaration that Jane had to be hears was truer now than it was then. A rage burned in her that someone had hurt Jane, tried to take her from Maura. She wouldn't stand for it. And it would have to be this determination that she would focus on. She feared if she let all the other emotions, the fear, the love, the angst, get in the way she would crumble. And if she crumbled she would fail Jane.

Maura must have gone into auto-pilot because they were walking into her office where Frost and team were busy running around before she snapped out of her spell. Frost had set up exactly as Jane had asked him to. The hundreds of pictures from the folder now took up an entire wall of her office. Jane Running. Jane coming in and out of work. Jane questioning witnesses from what she recognized was a case they had two weeks ago. Jane with that woman again at the park or drinking coffee or eating dinner together. Jane with Frost. Jane with her mom. Jane with Frankie. Over and over again Jane's routine snapped into a quick photo. What surprised her, though it probably shouldn't have, was there were only a few pictures of her with Jane. A few from crime scenes that were out in public places and then one from that day at the coffee shop.

"Frost fill me in. I want this son of a bitch in handcuffs before breakfast." Korsak shouted.

"You guys are going to want to sit down for this," Frost said.

Maura and Korsak sat on Maura's couch, which Forst faced them sitting on her coffee table. He handed Korsak an old file.

"Two years ago we had a case that closed as quickly as it began. A young girl, an older woman, and an older man were all killed within two weeks of each other. All of them stabbed in the stomach, all of them bled out. There were no relations to any of them and we wouldn't have linked it had we not found words written in semen every single time."

"I remember the case," Maura stated. "Jane had me run rape kits on all the victims but none of them showed any signs."

"Right. We concluded that the perp got off on the killing. But his DNA or at least the DNA used on the walls, were not in any database. We had a few leads but they went cold quickly and then the killer didn't kill again. It drove Jane nuts." Forst continued.

"Three months ago Jane was agitated. She wasn't sleeping, she was definitely drinking, and honestly, I was worried. I asked her what was going on and she told me she needed a break from..."

"Keep going, Frost. We are all going to have to push through, regardless of feelings." Korsak commented.

"It's ok Barry. Keep going. This is going to be personal for all of us." Maura said softly prepared for whatever Frost would say next.

With a soft nod at Maura, Barry continued, "She told me she needed a break from Maura. Like she needed to give Maura space. Her exact words were, 'Maura deserves to be happy. And to be her best friend I need to let her go.' I didn't totally understand, but I knew where I could help. Navy brat you know? Routine. Routine helps distract much better than booze. She changed everything up in a way. She added more running, more working out, but even after a week of that, she wasn't settled. Anyway, right around that time she brought this file back out. She said with all her extra time she wanted to focus on something maybe she could fix. So we started reworking it. Just in spare moments or evenings sitting on her couch. As Jane mentioned we never told anyone and we never went back to the scene. We had a pretty detailed file and with the evidence box we wanted to just see if we saw something new."

Maura sat there listening as Frost told her Jane wasn't too busy for her, that she had been avoiding her. In fact, Jane had so much spare time she was working on an old case. All those Friday nights missed. All those cancellations. It hadn't been for Derek as Maura originally assumed. Derek was quite literally her therapist. Which then sparked a question that needed to be asked.

"Maybe this is out of order, but why then was Jane seeing Derek?" Maura spoke out.

"That was my doing," Korsak mentioned.

"I didn't know about all of this part, Frost this is good intel, and I want to go through those pictures in a minute. But I should answer this first so we have state of mind of our victim." The words came out of habit and each of them cringed in their own way.

"Anyway. About three months ago I too knew Jane was drinking. Before the Dirty Robber, Jane and I used to go to another bar near her apartment called Tom's. It is a piece of shit, hole in the wall kind of place, but cops drank for free. The bartender knew us well. We stopped going there after the Robber re-opened. Proximity is helpful. But anyway. I got a call from Ralph, the bartender there one night. He said Jane had drank herself so hard she fell asleep at the bar. He didn't trust her to go home alone. I got her home and then slept on the couch. I was worried. Jane hadn't drank like that since Hoyt. When she woke up, despite her best efforts, I made her talk. Made her promise to talk to someone since she wouldn't talk to any of us. Derek helped me through my third divorce. I'm not thrilled telling you this, but that's what it is. I made her promise to go twice, but she kept going. Every week like clockwork. Friday's were the hardest for her so she chose to make sure that was the night she went. She only missed when we had a case and I got the feeling she rescheduled when she did."

"That doesn't sound like Jane at all. I'm glad she went. I hate that I had no idea. I honestly hate that I feel so useless right now, but I'm glad she went." Maura was chewing on her bottom lip. "But when I put my personal pain in all of this aside a question keeps popping up. What in the world could get Jane Rizzoli to willingly go to counseling?"

"I was just wondering the same thing," Frost said.

"That I can't tell you," Korsak mentioned back.

Maura looked up at the pictures again. Trying desperately to understand what else she was missing. Taking Maura's glance as a cue, Frost stood up and walked towards them.

"All of these pictures are from the last three weeks," Frost stated. "Based on the definition in Jane's upper body it couldn't have been any earlier than that. I know that sounds weird, but I've been helping her when I can down in the gym. Also see the red string on Jane's wrist there?" Frost points to a picture of Jane running in a t-shirt, "You'll find it in most of these first sets of pictures. That's from TJ. He put it on Jane's wrist before Sunday dinner one night. Jane was doing some kind of craft with him. She wore it for a week straight until it fell off. Plus Jane only met Sandy a couple weeks ago." Forst let that statement sit.

"Ok, I better ask. Who is Sandy?" Maura questioned. Jane had been dating both men and women for a few years now. Never very openly, but that was no secret to Maura. What was new was the jealousy building up just under the service of Maura's question.

Frost continued with caution, seeing something flash in Maura's eyes that looked an awful lot like jealousy. "Sandy and Jane met a few weeks ago. She moved into Jane's building. They've gone on a few dates, but Jane really saw her more as a friend. To be honest, I don't even think they slept together."

"We are going to need to talk to Sandy, see what else she may know about Jane's life over the past couple months. We want to make sure we know everything."

"Couple weeks." Frost corrected

"Huh?" Korsak questioned

"These pictures are only over a few weeks. They line up almost to the day of Jane checking out that evidence box. I know because we checked out the box but Jane had to leave by 8. She was meeting Sandy for a drink. Two days later they had dinner and that's where our pictures begin. See, here?" Forst points to the picture of the two of them at the restaurant that Maura had seen back at Derek's house.

"Also, Jane was on to something once we got the box. I don't know how it's just like how it happens sometimes. Something just clicked. She said what if each of these people wasn't killed because of who they were, but who they were to someone else. The little girl who was killed, her mom was a single parent - a real estate lawyer. And the older gentleman who died, his son owns one of the largest trade businesses here in Boston. Jane had a theory that these people were never the target, but the soft spot of the people this guy was threatening."

"But if it was a threat why were they killed? This was their only leverage." Maura stated.

"We hadn't gotten any farther than that. You could be right Maura, maybe the killer was trying to take from them what they took from him?" Frost commented. Maura could see his wheels turning all of a sudden like another piece of the puzzle could be clicking into place.

Just then there was a knock on the door, "Who is it?" Maura naturally responded being that it was her office.

"Is Sergent Korsak in there? A gift came from Detective Rizzoli and well, I think he will want to see it." The voice behind the door said. Maura looked at Korsak who stood to get the door. Behind the door stood the front desk officer with a Ballon tied to a white box. The balloon said, "Get Well Soon"

"Korsak. Don't touch it, hold on." Maura stated. Walking quickly to behind her desk to grab clothes. Once they were on she took the box from the officer. She untied the balloon and handed it back. "Please walk this over to the lab and ask Susie to fingerprint it." The officer looked at Sergent Korsak with a weird look and then turned to do as he was told.

Maura gently opened the box to find a notecard folded in half with a thumb drive. Written on the card it said, "Now that you know how easily I can remove you, I hope you'll take me more seriously Detective. My threats are never empty."

Maura felt a nasty shiver go down her spine. Frost had also put gloves on and was taking the thumb drive from Maura. He plugged it into his computer and a passcode requirement came up.

"It's password protected," Frost stated. "He must have wanted to make sure only Jane would look at this."

"Can't you just go around it or something Frost?" Korsak asked.

"No this is pretty state of the art. It's also 23 spaces long. The variations even through a computer software could take weeks to decode." Frost said. "Why would he think Jane would have this code? He clearly didn't realize how bad the accident would be. This gift seems to be pre-arranged. If we could figure out this code, maybe we could get ahead of him."

Maura's brain went into overdrive, but Korsak spoke first. "Why did those men go up to Jane after the accident just to leave her?"

"We assumed to make sure she was alive. There was nothing out of the ordinary except, well, for her obviously getting hit."

"No Korsak's right. One of the men said, 'I'm going as fast as I can' he was doing something." Maura commented in thought.

Frost grabbed his phone and dialed Frankie, "Hey Man, how's Jane?"

"Still asleep. They are about to wash her so the nurse and mom are locked in the room. She has a lot of blood on her still." Frankie said.

"You were at the hospital when the rolled Jane in, did they give you her clothes?" Frost questioned.

"Ya they gave me them in a plastic bag, but I just put them in Ma's purse. I didn't want to mess with them." Frankie replied.

"Frankie ask your mom to hand you the bag. We need to check something." Frost said back.

"Ok hold on." In the background, they could hear Frankie asking to enter the room again. "Alright I'm back, what am I looking for?"

"Wait, Frankie," Maura spoke up. "Actually could you just bring the bag here? We need to treat this like any other case. We don't know if those men had gloves on. There could be prints, evidence - I need those clothes." Maura's varied between a professional scientist who was insistent and a hurting lover who was scared.

"Ya Maura I can do that. I'm not supposed to leave though, right Korsak?" Frankie mentioned back.

"I'm on my way, Frankie. I'll relieve you for right now." Korsak said.

* * *

While Frankie and Korsak switched places Maura went to get some coffee in the cafe for the team. Everyone was running on empty. Her phone rang as she was heading back downstairs. She pulled it out of her purse to see Jack's name. She had completely forgotten about Jack since this morning.

"Hello Jack"

"Hi, Maura. You said you would call back. I know it's a bit much for me to call you, but it's been hours. I've been worried. How's the case going?"

It had been hours. Nearly 12 hours since Maura last spoke to Jack.

"I'm so sorry Jack, things got a little crazier than we expected. We've unfortunately had two bodies today and..." She stopped herself. No one else was supposed to know what was going on with Jane and her case. She also wasn't sure she was ready to even start the topic of Jane with Jack.

"And?" Jack replied.

"Oh sorry," Maura tried to recover. "And I've lost track of time."

"Well, that's ok. Are you still wanting to meet for dinner? I know it's late but if you leave now we can grab a table." Jack commented, clearly oblivious to the pure exhaustion in Maura's voice.

"No, I'm sorry Jack. I really am. I won't be able to. There is too much going on, I need to stay here and help the team."

"Oh sure. Well, let me know if you need anything. I'll talk to you tomorrow?" Jack asked, not stated.

"Yes sure, tomorrow," Maura replied and then hung up.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: More to come! I hope you enjoy this part. I know there is a lot going on, but these next couple chapters will be worth it!**

* * *

When Maura arrived back downstairs with the coffee Frankie had just entered.

"How is she Frankie?" Maura asked with concerned eyes.

"She's fine. Still resting. Ma is with her and Tommy arrived before Korsak switched with me." Frankie said. He then held up the bag, "I brought Jane's clothes like you asked."

"Let's do this the right way. Let me take this into the lab and go through it." Frankie and Frost stayed behind as Maura walked across the hall. It was late now, she knew the only person who would still be in the lab was Susie. When she entered the lab Susie looked up.

"The ballon has more than 30 different prints on it, but nothing that stands out. My guess is that whoever sent this never even touched the ballon itself." Susie mentioned sounding defeated.

"Better to rule it out, than be sloppy" Maura commented. "Will you help me with these?" Maura asked. As they pulled out Jane's clothing the blood and the small shards of glass pulled at Maura in the worst possible way. She dealt with blood every day, but this was Jane's blood. Even amongst the smell of blood and car exhaust and astringent most likely used by the emergency staff, Maura could still smell a hint of mahogany and lavender. It was that smell that finally put Maura over the edge. Tears began to flow from her eyes and she had to step back so not to get them on Jane's clothes. She tried to compose herself but the crying got worse and she sat down on the stool near her.

"Oh, Dr. Isles I'm so sorry. I know this feels personal. Detective Rizzoli has been in worse than this accident. She'll be back making you guess in no time." Susie said, trying to make a joke with Maura to make her feel better.

"I know, I know." Maura said, "Jane has been through so much but this time it feels different. I'm different. I'm handling this differently." Maura seemed to more be stating facts to herself than to Susie, but Susie listened as best she could.

"Jane's job puts her in these positions and that's something I've always understood. The danger comes with the job. As her best friend, I've never not supported her. I've been a little angry at her complete disregard for protocol and her safety, but never not supported her. But now..." Maura stopped, her breath shaking.

"Now what?" Susie asked softly.

"Now the thought of losing her has become much more unbearable." Maura sobbed.

"You and Detective Rizzoli have always had something special. Something more than any of us are lucky enough to find. I'm sure I cannot imagine what you are going through." Susie said back. She was going through Jane's blazer when she found a piece of paper in Jane's inside pocket.

"Dr. Isles I think I found something," Susie stated.

Maura used the inside of her wrists to pat away the tears in her eyes, shook herself, and then stood to get back to work. Susie carefully unfolded the piece of paper to reveal numbers and symbols.

"That's not Jane's handwriting" Maura stated. "Susie that very well may be what we were looking for."

A few minutes later Maura basically ran back over to the guys in her office with a picture of the piece of paper. She left Susie to work on any fingerprints or additional evidence they may find.

"I think I have your code." she nearly shouted. Frost and Frankie turned around in surprise. Frost typed in the numbers and different symbols. The computer unlocked and there was a small cheering of nods amongst the three of them.

"There's a file folder with Jane's name," Frost commented as he clicked the folder. Inside the folder were four items, all with a number. The first was a video file labeled, '1. Confession'

"We have to watch it," Frost said out loud.

"Yes, but it doesn't mean I feel good about it," Frankie commented back.

The stilled shot was of Jane sitting in Derek's office. The walls were blue as they should have been, the date labeled on the video was from two months ago. Frost hit play.

"I don't understand why you have to record this. I feel stupid" Jane stated looking at the camera.

They could then hear, but not see Derek respond, "Jane this is for you. It helps you put it into the universe. I also want you to take this home and look at it when you are ready. You yourself told me that the body speaks more than the mouth. I want you to understand your own truth when you are ready."

"Ok mind Jedi, I see your point" Jane snarked back. All three of them laughed a little. None of them admitted it out loud, but in this moment before whatever was about to happen, happened it just felt good to hear Jane's voice. For her to be her normal, sarcastic self.

"So Jane. I want you to tell me what's keeping you up at night."

"Caffeine. Huge addict, can't stop myself" Jane joked again.

"Whenever you are ready Jane," Derek said calmly back. He wasn't phased by Jane at all. Maura found herself admiring his approach. It reminded her of how she handles Jane. Lovingly, but sometimes ignoring the sarcasm altogether.

"What keeps me up at night is an annoying question." Jane started. Maura watched her body language shift from being defensive to being open. Jane had uncrossed her legs and leaned forward placing her hands on her thighs. Her posture spoke volumes. "It's an annoying question because it's embarrassing and terrifying to me. I've had nightmares before. I've been tormented and beaten up. I've literally looked some of the worst criminals in the eyes while they tell me the horrible things they've done. I have plenty of reasons to be kept up at night. But lately, those seem much more manageable. Like I can control those things somehow, but I can't control this."

Jane huffed. Visibly fighting herself internally. "I've fallen in love. And not the kind where you are in blissful whatever. It's actually terrible. I've never felt like this about anyone before. And I can't feel this way. It's not safe and it's not fair. So I've worked on distracting myself. Frost gave me some good tips on working out and well Korsak sent me here. But I don't know if it's going to help."

The video stopped. Clearly, they were only given a small piece of a larger video.

"What!" Frankie shouted as if he were watching a movie and not his big sister.

"I didn't know Jane was in love. You said her and whats her face weren't even sleeping together! And honestly, should we even look at whatever else is in this file? This is so different than her talking about nightmares and bad guys. This is really personal. Jane would be mortified to know we were watching this. Right, Maura back me up here?" Frankie stated. When both men looked at Maura they were not expecting to see the tears flowing down Maura's face. She hadn't totally lost it, she was composed but the heartache was too much. Jane loved someone else. Was Maura just a hopeful rebound? Did Jane just need a distraction and found it in Maura's arms? That kiss, that moment it was so much more. It had to be. This wasn't right. This wasn't fair.

Maura cleared her throat as best she could. "What else is in the file folder, Frost. We need to know what this guy knows about Jane."

Both men looked at each other and then back at Maura. "Maura are you ok?" Frost asked.

"No, I'm not ok. This isn't ok. None of this is ok, but we can't help Jane if we shy away from knowing everything. So Frost, please. Open the next file."

The next was a voice recording,

"Jane just tell her," said a female voice

"I can't. I just can't." Jane spoke back, you could hear her normal rasp broken like she was crying

"Jane you can't keep this up. What's the worst that could happen, she says she doesn't feel the same?" the voice says again

"No that isn't the worst. The worst is she pulls away. That I lose everything. I can't lose her. I'll take my small slivers I have now. Someday I'll get over this and then I can be normal. We can be normal." Jane said desperately.

"Jane if someone loved me the way you love her, I would die happy. There is no way she can't know how you feel, at least in some way. I've never met her but I saw her once. I saw her watch you walk away. The intensity in her eyes told me there has to be something there for her too."

"No. She's with someone. And I'm not her type anyway. She told me. Honestly, we have to change the subject. I can't do this."

The recording stopped. For Maura, the floor had come out from under her. She felt like she was going to throw up. She sat on her desk and stared at the wall of pictures. She wasn't really looking at them, she just desperately didn't want to be looking at Frost and Frankie.

"Wait I don't understand," Frost said after a minute.

Maura's voice cracked, but you could hear the anger she meant to hide in her voice. "What's there to misunderstand Barry? Jane's in love with this Sandy woman. Some kind of deep, uncontrollable love. And none us were important enough to tell."

She turned around to face them and every single emotion that was running through her flashed across her face. That's when Frost figured it out. He watched the hurt try to cover up the anger that was covering up the jealousy that was covering up the anguish type love Jane was talking about in the video. Maura was in love with Jane. That's why this was so hard for her. It made sense. He always wondered if the two of them were actually dating and just not telling anyone, but then Maura would be with someone or Jane and it didn't make sense. What if Maura was who Jane was talking about?

"Maura" Frost said back. "No, what I mean is that was Sandy's voice on the recording with Jane. Jane was talking TO Sandy, not about Sandy."

Maura's eyes went big. "Oh. Wait. Then who is she talking about?" Maura said.

"Well, I for sure have no idea," Frankie said.

The third file was another folder. When Frost clicked it there were multiple jpeg files inside the folder. He clicked on the first one. It was Jane sitting on the edge of her bed.

"This is her bedroom" Maura gasped unable to keep her discomfort internal.

She was holding a picture frame and it was clear she was crying. Tears were rolling down her cheeks, her forehead crinkled in the way it does she's trying to fight herself. When Maura looked closer she recognized it as the frame from Jane's dresser.

"This photo is time dated from last night" Frost stated. He clicked to the next picture. It was Maura helping Jane into the car. Jane's eyes on Maura were noticeably filled with intensity. It made Maura's brain flashback to watching Jane watch her in the mirror. It felt as if they had caught something private. Little hairs started to rise on the back of Maura's neck.

"That's from this morning" Maura whispered. Something told her she knew what was coming next even before she heard Frost's mouse click to the next photo.

The picture was again from Jane's bedroom. Jane's back was to the window where the camera was clearly capturing images from. Jane was making out with someone. She covered enough of the other person that not much could be made out. It was a woman, she was shorter than Jane, and she was blonde. The woman had on a skirt and a dark purple top. Her pale hands were an extreme contrast to the dark hair that had wrapped themselves up in.

"Oh, my" Maura whispered and put her hand on her chest. She felt mixed emotions as she stared at the screen.

It was then that Frankie looked at the picture, back Maura, and then back at the picture. Maura was still in the same deep purple top from this morning. The same top that was in this photo.

"What!" Frankie exclaimed still working to wrap his words around what his brain just figured out.

"Under different circumstances, I would be saying 'Thank God' you two figured it out it" Frost commented

"We um..." Maura blushed as she tried to speak. "I don't know it just happened."

"How long?" Frankie asked.

"Honestly, just this morning. That was our first kiss. Our only kiss. That was the first time I was in Jane's apartment in months."

"He found her weakness," Frost said quietly. Then he stood and walked back and forth looking at the photos. "All these pictures what's missing?"

"I don't know. It's everything Jane does. Nothing is missing." Frankie said, his voice was sharp clearly not over not knowing about Jane and Maura.

"I'm missing," Maura said.

"Yes. Exactly. You are missing!" Frost nearly shouted. He had figured something out. "At first that bugged me on a personal level. It reminded me of the strain your friendship was having and how much of an impact it had on Jane. But now, thinking about it through the lens of this case. Knowing now that YOU are the person Jane is in love with, I'm seeing what our killer was seeing."

Maura felt butterflies in her stomach. This was absolutely the most terrible time to be feeling butterflies but all of what just happened ran through her. Jane was in love with her. Jane was in love with her. She kept repeating it like a mantra. Oh my god, Jane was in love with her.

"I don't understand," Frankie's statement grabbing her attention again.

"When you look at these pictures there is nothing out of the ordinary, nothing that specifically captures Jane's focus. Yes, she loves her work. Yes, she visits her mother and she runs, every day. But everyone is fueled by something or someone. Something that ignites them, something that they would be lost without. You can't find that in these pictures. He was stalking Jane to find her weakness, but he couldn't find it. Because Jane had already been pushing her away."

Frost was pacing back and forth with the old case file. He pulled out pictures of the old victims and put it on the adjoining wall. "That's what he was taking from these people. He was taking the one thing they couldn't live without. He was taking their hearts, but making them continue to live with the loss."

Maura stared at the wall of pictures of the victims and then of those these individuals dying would hurt the most. It was devastating to look at.

"So should we be assuming that each of these people failed to do whatever he asked? And that's why these people are dead?" Frankie questioned.

"I don't know if it's that simple, but maybe," Frost said.

"So let me get this straight. My sister finally admits to herself she's in love with Maura. Not only that after what months of hating herself over it her and Maura share what looks like a pretty damn intimate moment. And now we've just realized that the person in the absolute most danger is Maura?!" Frankie proclaims more than asks. He takes a deep breath and then continues. "I don't know about you, but I don't want to be the person to face Jane if Maura receives even a scratch on her head. You think she was protective before, shit we are in for a treat if we mess this up."

Frost laughed a little. His back was to both Maura and Frankie starting at the pictures of the cold case's victims. "This is so frustrating. We are missing something. We are missing the connection. We are missing the why and until we get there we can't get to the who. God, I wish Jane where here."

Maura cleared her throat, finally ready to speak after the reality of everything finally settled on her. "It's after 1 in the morning. Korsak has been at the hospital for most of the evening and night. We need a few hours of sleep. We cracked the first piece, much to the help of the killer. We know I'm going to be used, in some way, against Jane. Or that I might be in danger. Jane would want me near her and I know I'm being selfish right now, but that's the only place I want to be. So let's lock up my office, take the night, and I'll drive myself over to the hospital."

"Maura," Frankie said sternly. "There is no way in hell we are letting you go anywhere alone right now."

"Frankie's right" Frost continued. "As you just said. You are in danger and you are not just a potential target, you are thee target for this guy. You will need to have a protective detail at all times. I'm sorry but that's just how it's going to be. We need fresh eyes on this, it would be good for Korsak to go through it now and us again in the morning. Maura I'll drive you to the hospital and switch with Korsak. I don't mind sleeping on a chair. Frankie why don't you come too and try to take your mom home. I don't think she'll listen to me."

The group of them quietly got their things, Maura locked her office, and then they left. Maura once again found herself staring at the window in the passenger seat of a detective's cruiser and found it strange that this time being quiet was too much.

"Did you mean what you said about Jane and myself?" Maura asked as if Frost had been listening to her thoughts as well.

"You mean about her and you finally figuring it out?" Frost said.

"Yes"

"Ya of course I did. Why?" Frost asked.

"Because I just figured it out this morning." Maura glanced at the clock on the dashboard, "I guess yesterday morning. How could you have known?"

"Maura the way you two are. No one is like you two. You're connected in a way that isn't just professional."

"Yes, we've been best friends for years, Frost. We've always been close." Maura stated back sincerely unsure what he meant.

"Look, Maura, I know you two are best friends. And I know women tend to have closer friendships than men sometimes. But you and Jane, you are different. The way you look at each other. The way you listen to each other. Sometimes you won't even ask something of Jane and I've watched her react as if it's second nature to take care of you. I've questioned a few times if you both were dating secretly and not telling us. There have been times that the chemistry between you two is so intense I've excused myself from the room." Frost stated.

"Oh," Maura said, a blush burning in her cheeks. "I'm sorry we made you uncomfortable Frost. I would have never done that had I known. I really didn't know."

Frost shook his head. "That's not the point. I was never uncomfortable, I just always thought I would want to be alone with someone when that kind of thing is boiling under the surface." Frost said. They had stopped at a red light and he was able to look over at Maura. She was pensive, which wasn't an unusual look for Maura to have, but he was worried she was berating herself. "What's going on over there? You really shouldn't worry so much about how I was feeling in those situations."

"Oh. Well, I guess it's not that." Maura started. "No offense I hope."

"No none was taken. So what then?" Frost asked.

"Jane has always been special to me. At first, it was her looking past my social shortcomings and showing genuine interest in who I was as a person. Then, of course, inviting me into her inner circle, making me a part of it. The team, her family. I've never had a best friend, so a lot of times when things felt deep I wondered if it was just confusing to me because I had never had a relationship like this before." Maura sat there chewing on her lip. "I've always been attracted to Jane. How could you not? Those eyes, her jawline, not to mention…"

"Whoa! I'm here to listen, but let's keep it PG. Jane is one of the guys as far as I'm concerned." Frost said jokingly.

Maura's blush ran through her cheeks and down her neck. Frost laughed. A much-needed laugh. "Hey, I didn't mean to embarrass you. I know you are both attracted to each other. I've already said it. The chemistry, the sex eyes you two have for each other. It's obvious."

"I'm sorry Frost for unloading. It's just been a lot. I guess I'm just trying to say I think I've been in love with Jane for a long time. It's why no relationship I've tried the past several years has lasted. It's why I couldn't seem to invest myself into someone emotionally - I had already done so. It's just making sense to me now is all. I haven't been broken, I've just already been in love with someone. Now realizing it feels like I've been cheating on Jane, on us. Giving pieces of myself away that belonged to her." Maura paused. She'd said more out loud than she meant to, but she wasn't going to try to take it back. "I just need to see her."

Out of the corner of his eye, Frost saw Maura go back to looking out the window. He really wasn't sure what to say and was a little relieved when it looked like Maura wasn't looking for a response. One thing was for certain, no one was touching a hair no Maura's head. He wouldn't let Jane down.

* * *

When Maura walked into Jane's room she nodded at Korsak who was sitting next to Angela. Angela had fallen asleep. She was glad they were there, but her attention on them only lasted as long as waiting for Korsak to nod back as she noticed Frost walk over to him. What was far more important to Maura was Jane. She set her coat and purse down in the chair next to Jane's bed. She ran her fingers along Jane's hairline, tucking small strands behind Jane's ear. Maura found comfort in staring at Jane's face again. Her strong jaw line and soft lips. She was so lost in Jane's face she didn't hear Frankie come in as well.

Frankie moved to softly wake his mother, "Hey Ma" he whispered. "Come on wake up, I'll take you home to catch some sleep."

"Hey, Frankie," Angela whispered back, sleep in her voice. "I should stay here with Jane. I don't want her alone."

"She isn't," Frankie said and then he tipped his head in the direction of Maura standing next to Jane. The room was dark itself, but the light of the hallway shined in enough to give the room a dusky feeling. Maura's profile was staring at Jane's face. Angela began to put on her jacket when she felt Korsak's hand softly grab her arm. She turned around to see Maura leaning over Jane, gently placing her lips softly on Jane's.

Frankie watched his mother's face, expecting her to act shocked or disappointed. Angela Rizzoli was known for her loud interactions and quick ability to guilt her children, Maura included, into a confession. He was surprised to see very little expression at all. Angela finished putting her coat on and grabbed her purse before walking towards Maura.

Maura felt Angela's lips on her temple before she heard her. It made her jump just a bit, but she closed her eyes at the motherly affection - something she still felt surprised about from time to time. "Take care of her sweetheart. I'll see you in the morning." was all Angela said. She looked at Frankie indicating she was ready to go and then left the room. Frankie followed suit with two detectives quickly behind him. Korsak shut the door.

Angela turned around to face them. She scanned each of their faces before she said. "So how long have each of you known that Janie and Maura were together?" Her voice was threatening.

"Well, this makes a little more sense to me," Frankie said sarcastically when his mother started to overreact. "Ma we just found out a few hours ago. Janie and Maura really haven't even talked about it I don't think. Right, Frost?"

Barry Frost was terrified of only a few people in his life. Jane Rizzoli and Angela Rizzoli were both on that list for two entirely different reasons. He decided the fewer words the better and just nodded.

"I, for one, had no idea. What do you mean you just found out?" Korsak stated.

"Oh hush old man, I could tell you didn't know." Angela jokingly said to Korsak.

"Ma I gotta be honest you are taking this way better than I expected you to" Frankie commented.

"Why Frankie? You thought I would see Jane kiss or I guess I should say be kissed by another woman and I would be upset with her? Disown her because of who she loves? Maura is like a daughter to me. And those two have been in love with each other for years."

"So why all the comments about settling down? Getting a husband? Having children?" Frankie asked.

"Oh, I'm getting grandchildren Frances." Angela barked. "But I made those comments more to continue to test the waters of where Jane was at. The harder part was watching her date people but keeping her heart secured in the safety of Maura. That tore me apart." Everyone just stared at Angela. "I guess I should also admit I may or may not have watched something I shouldn't have."

"Ma!" Frankie exclaimed. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh stop. I'm her mother Frankie. Janie was going through all these changes. Not talking to Maura. Organizing her apartment. I could never see the girl's floor growing up it was so covered with clothes and crap, but she her apartment, nearly overnight, becomes flawlessly clean and then stays that way?!" Angela nearly shouted. "Oh no, I didn't believe it. Something was up. Something changed. So one day when Jane asked me to come over and let Jo out, I may or may not have looked around a bit."

"Ma" Frankie gasped again. Not shocked by his mother, but not willing to just let it sit either.

"What! It was just sitting on her coffee table. It was a disc and it said her name. I had to watch it." Angela shrugged her shoulders as if she had every right to watch whatever it was.

"What was it," Maura said behind them. Everyone jumped and turned around. Everyone had been so caught up in Angela's reaction no one heard Maura open and close the door. Maura looked impatient. "Well, Angela?"

"Maura I'm sorry," Angela said taking a step towards her. Maura took a small step back shaking her head. She wasn't sure how she felt yet. "Please just continue."

"It was a video from one of Janie's sessions with Derek. She was talking about being…" she took a breath and then continued more quickly. "She talked about being in love. How much she couldn't be. How it wouldn't be fair to the other person. How much she would lose. By the end of the tape, Jane was in tears and all of those things she said only added up to one person. There is only one person in her life she trusts in that way, could possibly love in that way. And it was Maura. She never said it on the tape, but I took a leap, especially knowing how they both have always felt about each other. And then yesterday when I realized Maura hadn't been in Jane's apartment in months, I knew I was right. I thought about it after the two of you left. I watched Jane watch Maura as they stepped out. I was right and watching Maura lean over to kiss Jane just a few minutes ago sealed it for me. I just wish you would have told us, Maura. We love you both."

Maura nodded and then turned around to go back into Jane's hospital room without another word. Angela took a step to follow her but Frost gently stopped her. "They didn't know how each other felt." He started which made Angela step back again. "They only kissed this morning and I think Maura is feeling overwhelmed. This isn't how things should happen. You shouldn't find out your best friend is in love with you with everyone else. We gotta give her space, I'm getting a little worried she's going to snap. And we need Maura's head as clear as it can be. She's a key part of us solving this."

"Ma let's go home. It's almost 2 am now. You can come back after you get a few hours of sleep." Angela simply let Frankie lead her away. When they were out of sight Korsak sat down in a chair outside Jane's room and patted the one next to him for Frost.

"Korsak what are you doing?" Frost asked. "You need to go home and sleep. I got this."

"Oh no. I'm not going anywhere until you fill me in completely" Korsak stated. The two of them sat there as Frost unloaded the last several hours of information.


	7. Chapter 7

Opening her eyes in the morning was always her least favorite activity. The alarm would sound and the moment she opened her eyes it meant she had to face everything again. This morning felt different. Her head was pounding, like a terrible hangover. Did she drink last night? She didn't remember drinking. Oh god, did she drink so much she didn't remember? She hadn't done that in months. She hadn't opened her eyes yet, but she could feel the sun shining in the window, burning at her eyelids reminding her another day had started.

BEEP

Wait. What was that?

BEEP

Jane opened her eyes and felt immediately overwhelmed trying to take in her surroundings. The hospital room was bright, the windows in the room were facing the rising sun. The beeping she heard was from a machine to her left that seemed to be monitoring her heart. There was also an IV in her arm that had some kind of clear fluid. The memories of the car accident, the killer, the semen on the wall all came flooding back to her. Her heart rate started picking up quickly and the beeping on the machine shared in her agitated energy.

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

The sound came out in quicker successions. What caused the greatest pause, however, was the beautiful blonde hair spread across the blanket. The stunning face that was turned towards her, laying on her left leg. The fingers that were intertwined with hers. The smell of Maura's shampoo and perfume. The moment was comforting, having Maura that close. As she stared down at her, Jane remembered their kiss. Snapshots of Maura in the mirror invaded Jane's mind. The feelings of fighting herself, how she had desperately tried to not cross the line she had originally protected with every ounce of energy she had. The out of this world sensation of tasting Maura. Of running her hands down Maura's body.

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

Unfortunately, her body chose to ruin the moment. As memories flooded her, so did her arousal and that caused her heart rate to skyrocket. And apparently having her heart rate skyrocket also cause the pain radiating from her skull to magnify.

Jane couldn't help groaning from the pain, "Fuck this hurts."

Maura's eyes flew open when she heard Jane's voice. "Oh my God, Jane!" Maura exclaimed. She sat up, looking at Jane's face, and could only see anguish.

"My head just started throbbing. I can barely think." Jane gasped.

Maura clicked a button on the beeping machine and then looked at Jane. "Jane just breath. Let's steady your heartbeat, it's racing right now. The added blood flow most likely caused a surge in your brain as well. I just hit your pain meds, you should feel them soon."

With closed eyes, Jane just nodded. For Maura, it was taking every ounce of her not to ask Jane a million questions or wrap Jane's lips up inside her own. Instead, she settled on watching her face. Grateful to have heard that rasp again, feeling it still reverberate around inside her. She got so lost in the happiness of it that she didn't realize Jane had opened her eyes again.

"Why do you look so happy that I'm in pain?" Jane said sarcastically.

"I'm sorry Jane. I'm not happy you are hurting. I just didn't realize how much I missed your voice until I heard it." Maura stated honestly, though a small blush ran across her cheeks.

Jane took Maura in then. The pain meds had started to calm the ache in her skull. Maura's purple blouse was wrinkly and her hair's curls mostly gone. In fact, while Jane found her gorgeous right now, she realized Maura's make up was mostly gone but what remained was smeared. That's when it dawned on her that this was morning light, not evening. How long was she out for? Had Maura stayed with her the whole time?

"What time is it?" Jane asked trying to assess what was going on.

The door of Jane's room opened and the doctor appeared. "Oh, Good Morning Jane. I'm very happy to see you awake. And nice to see you again Dr. Isles." The doctor said in a genuine tone. He was older, cheery. Jane wondered if being that happy in the morning came with age.

"Hello?" Jane said to him. Realizing she didn't actually know who he was. Before he closed the door Jane saw two officers standing outside and what looked like the back of Frost's head.

"Jane I'm Dr. Knowles - I have been in charge of your care since you entered the hospital. Can you tell me what day it is?" The Dr. asked.

"Uh." Jane started. "I honestly cannot doc. I'm a little confused on timing right now."

"That's to be expected, Jane. We can answer that in a second for you. Could you just tell me what the last thing you remember is before waking up?"

"Ya, I was in the car coming back from a crime scene. It was really bugging me because this guy was coming after me, which just really pissed me off. And I was talking to Maur…." That's when Jane stopped and looked at Maura. Realizing how terrifying it must have been for Maura to be on the other line when she got hit by a car. She looked into Maura's eyes who hadn't quite understood where Jane's head was at yet.

"Oh gosh Maur, I'm so sorry. That must have been so scary for you." Jane said reaching for Maura's arm to run her hand down it.

"Jane you were in an accident and you are worried about how it affected me?" Maura asked her eyes still intently staring at Jane's. "You are here. You are alive. You are ok. I'm fine."

"Ah yes, well that is what love does to a person." The doctor said with a bright smile on his face. "The tough, protective types are always the softest. Especially towards spouses." He nodded at Maura.

"Um," Jane said trying to save face that she wasn't in love with Maura, as well as correct the doctor they weren't married. She was so caught up in herself she didn't see the blush on Maura's chest or up around her neck. Dr. Knowles paid no mind to either of them.

"Jane, to be honest, I had about a dozen more questions to ask you to ensure no brain damage had occurred in your accident but you seem to be doing better than expected just by how alert you are. And it seems like you are at least aware of that appropriate timeline. To give you some clarity here, you were in your accident yesterday afternoon. You suffered some minor bruising, your ribs will be sore for a few days. More importantly, you also suffered a pretty hard blow to the head. There was some swelling and bleeding in the brain, but we were able to maintain it. We decided to allow you to stay in an induced coma to ensure no brain damage occurred. What I do want to warn you about is that while your memory seems fine, we will need to take it easy. An increased heart rate or strenuous activity will not do your body any good." He looked at Jane to make sure she understood.

While Jane and the doctor continued to talk about Jane's condition and what her treatment plan should be Maura took the time to stare at Jane's face. To watch her lips move and her eyebrows show expression as she made jokes. Maura couldn't handle how much she was in love with Jane and how unaware of it she had been before yesterday. She wanted to enjoy this moment, just to be present in Jane's presence because she knew the day was going to change. They were going to have to tell Jane they went through her private life. They were going to have to tell Jane they figured things out.

When the doctor left, Jane turned to Maura. "Maur I'm ok. The doc said I'm going to be fine. Go home. Shower. You are still in your clothes from yesterday, the wrinkles must be killing you." Jane joked trying to ease whatever the expression on Maura's face was. Trying to get her to feel comfortable to leave. Jane felt so guilty that Maura was there. So guilty that all she wanted to do was pull Maura on top of her and kiss her.

"Jane," Maura commented back, giving her an eyebrow at the joke. "I'll have Angela bring me things to get ready here. I'm not going anywhere. And to be honest, I'm not sure I'm allowed to leave if I wanted to."

"What does that mean? Of course, you can leave. I won't hold you here. I'm sorry you felt like you had to stay Maura."

"That's not what I meant. I mean I need to talk to you. Let me just use the restroom and take a moment to freshen up ok?" Maura asked. When Jane nodded Maura walked, picked up her bag, and went into the bathroom of Jane's room. Thankfully she always carried a few things with her due to the nature of the job. Maura brushed her hair and then used a little hairspray and bobbie pins to pull her hair into a soft bun. She then washed her face and re-applied her make up. Realizing she wasn't sure if she'd be able to shower for awhile she reapplied deodorant and her perfume before exiting the bathroom. As she walked out she shot a text to Angela for some clothes.

Jane watched Maura walk out of the bathroom. She had been impatient ever since she left. It amazed her that Maura could be gone 15 minutes and literally look runway ready all over again - well besides the wrinkled clothes which honestly just made her more endearing.

"You're beautiful," Jane said, surprising herself when she realized she said it out loud. She felt herself blushing and also felt ashamed that she was taking advantage of her friend's kindness. She was, however, rewarded with the most amazing smile from Maura. She could tell Maura had been surprised by the comment, but her very genuine, happy reaction made Jane's heart start racing.

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

Maura's face changed quickly to panic. "Jane are you ok?" She asked quickly walking over.

Jane laughed to try to hide some of her embarrassment. "Yes, I'm ok Maura. Unfortunately, this machine is giving me very little to hide behind."

Maura did her signature head tilt and bit her lip. She watched as Jane's blush brighten further across her neck. She understood. If the machine was attached to her it would have probably broken with the way her own heart was racing.

"Jane I need to tell you about the case," Maura stated.

Jane immediately sat up more to listen. "Did you get any breaks? I'm sorry I should have asked immediately I wasn't even thinking about the time we must have lost. Fill me in. How can I help? Who should we talk to?"

"Jane slow down. Your heart rate is already high and honestly I'm worried this is going to upset you." Maura tried to remain calm. The look on Jane's face did not help anything. She could tell Jane was upset by not knowing and upset by Maura's words. Maura took a deep breath and then said, "You know what let me start from the beginning. I know you are going to be uncomfortable and unhappy, but let me get this out ok?" When Jane nodded, Maura proceeded to tell Jane everything they had done and had to learned. Selfishly she left out most of her own personal reactions. She chose to make it based on facts alone. Jane needed to hear this from her. She deserved a moment to process and not in front of everyone else.

Right around the part of the story where Maura explained that they had watched the video interview with Derek, Jane put her face in her hands. For the remainder of Maura's download, Jane sighed and groaned but never removed her face from her hands.

When Maura was done Jane took a deep breath, removed her hands, sat up straight, and squared her shoulders. Her jawline was tight, a clear indicator she was angry.

"So let me get this straight. Not only did guys learn about some of the most embarrassing, intimate pieces of my life that I've been trying to get through... The team also saw a picture of us kissing. In addition to that, you also found out I've been in love with you for like ever. And now, someone who wants to hurt me has found out as well? Does that about cover it?" Jane said. The venom in her voice was thick. It was as if she didn't realize she just told Maura, herself, out loud, that she was in love with her. It was one thing to learn about this through the case, it was something entirely different to actually hear it from Jane's mouth. Maura's breath hitched in her throat.

"Yes, but Jane…" Maura started, but Jane cut her off.

"No buts Maura. There isn't anything to fix this. This is mortifying. And you are in danger. I need space. I'm suffocating with you this close to me right now telling me all this."

Jane's honesty was harsh. While she didn't mean it to be cruel, it stung. Maura tried to rationalize it. She knew this was going to be a lot for Jane. Not a single one of them felt good about going through Jane's personal life. She shook it off.

"I'm sorry you feel that way, Jane. I thought it best you heard it from me. Korsak will be here soon. Honestly, I'm shocked your mother hasn't already barged through the door.

"AHHHH" Jane yelled and made Maura jump.

"Jane yelling doesn't help anything," Maura said angrily.

"I'm just so frustrated Maura." Jane shot back. "No one was supposed to know my personal life. All my vulnerabilities."

"Jane, how else were we going to understand what he was after? Who he was after?" Maura stated, trying to push aside the fear she was feeling knowing she was speaking about herself.

"UH. I knew! I had figured it out!" Jane said.

Maura's eyes shot up in genuine surprise, but her anger had not yet left from Jane's outbursts, "What do you mean you knew?"

"Well I guess I didn't one hundred percent know, but once we had left Derek's office I was pretty certain. Things clicked into place for me, starting with the file folder. I guess I should have been spooked by the pictures, but I wasn't. What scared me more, as weird as this is going to sound, was that all Derek's notes were missing. Every week he would pull that file out of his desk. He would take notes, put them in there, and file the folder before I left. I think he did it to help me feel in control of my private life like it wasn't sitting out for people to see. If he was trying to gain my trust, it worked. I felt better every single time I watched him pull it out and then put it away. He also kept my journal entries he made me do in there. When those were missing, I got pretty freaked out. I realized I would have to share, at least in part, my feelings about you with the team. I was deciding how to do that when you called me from your car."

Maura sat on the edge of the bed and looked out the window. Jane watched different emotions flash over Maura's face. She knew this was a lot. As embarrassed as she was about her emotions being plastered out there for everyone on her team to see, she was more mortified about what it was doing to Maura. Maura was never supposed to know, never supposed to be burdened with Jane's feelings. Jane reached her hand out as far as she could and her fingertips brushed across what she could touch of Maura's hand on the bed.

"Come here please," Jane said quietly. This was the first time she had lowered her voice since Maura had told her everything. Maura scooted closer and Jane wrapped both her hands around Maura's. She softly ran her thumb over Maura's palm and took a shaky breath before she went to look at Maura again. When she looked up she saw soft, intent eyes.

"I'm so sorry Maura. This isn't how you were supposed to find out. This wasn't supposed to be your burden." Jane said just above a whisper.

Maura knew she shouldn't push it, but she couldn't help herself. She was upset with Jane but also with herself that they had to have this conversation... that she had been blind to Jane's feelings and her own. She was also frustrated that Jane knew, that Jane had been able to identify it, and never shared it with her.

"How is it much different than me finding out when you decided how to announce it to all of us? What... would you water it down? Make sure I or we didn't understand the depth of it? And if you never pulled that evidence in the first place and this person never identified you as a threat, then what? Would you have ever told me?" Maura questioned back. The words weren't loaded, they were simply honest. She needed the truth.

Jane exhaled softly again and rolled her head from side to side. The pain in her skull was increasing, but the pain of this conversation was worse, nearly unbearable.

"I don't know." Jane started.

"You don't know how it's different or you don't know if you would have ever told me?" Maura pushed Jane to clarify. "I need more from you, Jane. I can't sit here and be content with I don't know."

"I don't know if I would have told you," Jane said. The hurt in Maura's eyes was suffocating. Jane had to look away to keep her composure. She closed her eyes and rubbed her head with one of her hands, the other still holding onto Maura.

"Look, Maura, I never wanted to burden you with this. I didn't expect it to happen, it just did. And when it did. When I realized that my feelings for you were so much more than the friendship you expected from me, it scared the shit out of me." She opened her eyes to Maura staring at her, listening to every word. "And I knew it wasn't fair. Once I realized my feelings everything change, everything became a little different for me. I knew that our normal banter would mean more to me now than you expected it to. I knew that you would come to me for comfort as your friend or when we were hanging out you'd run your fingers along my hairline when I laid on your lap. You would assume everything was as it always was. That it was just our own, normal blurry lines and I couldn't handle it. I couldn't handle lying to you. Pretending that I didn't crave every God damn look and touch and word that fell from your lips. So I created distance as best I could. My hope was with time I could get past it, work through it."

When Maura just kept looking at Jane and listening, Jane chose to continue. She had to get it out now, the rest of it before her courage left her. "Maura your friendship it means everything to me. You mean everything to me. So I did things I thought was right, but I also pushed myself to try to get better. I went to counseling for Christ's sake. Desperately trying anything to expel these feelings from me."

"To get better?" Maura said quietly now looking at their joined hands. "Are you that ashamed of loving me that I'm the equivalent of an illness to you?"

"That's not what I meant Maura. I'm not ashamed because I'm in love with you. I'm ashamed that I couldn't get past my feelings for the sake of our friendship. I'm terrified you'll leave me now."

"Jane you left me. So did you just need to beat me to it? This perceived notion you had in your head that I would just up and leave? That I wasn't capable of the truth? You left me, Jane. You boxed me out and day by day I felt you drifting away, pushing me farther from the only safe place I've ever had."

"Maura I had to. I had to get space to get over you."

"No, you chose to," Maura said and watched Jane drop her head. She knew she was being harsh but she deserved answers. "Now for my second question. Were you just going to tell me with everyone else after you realized it at the crime scene?"

"God no Maura. I was going home." Jane swallowed as memories of the car crash flashed before her eyes. She hadn't thought about it in detail yet. The sounds, the smell, the impact of the hit all starting to coming back to her.

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

Her heart rate and blood pressure were rising. Maura kept an eye on it. She was torn between her nervousness for Jane's health and her anxiety around her own sanity that was depending on these answers. Maura squeezed Jane's hand to reassure her. She had no words to give, but she didn't want Jane to feel alone.

"I was going to stop by my apartment quickly. I had a new lockbox installed two months ago. I had been meaning to get it and when I went through all that cleaning and organizing I decided that was the time to have it installed and hidden. Anyway, I kept copies of my journal entries in there. I knew for us to figure things out we could use those to our advantage. I also was going to make sure you read one of them first before I told everyone else. You deserved that much."

"Thank you, Jane," Maura said softly. Jane's hair had fallen into her eyes again and Maura moved to gently run her fingers through the curls and lightly tuck them behind Jane's ear. She kept her hand on Jane's cheek for a moment, lost in the intimacy before she removed it.

"For what Maura?" Jane asked after she took a deep breath.

"For being honest with me right now. For wanting to give me that moment. I'm sorry you weren't able to."

"No, I'm sorry. This creep is after me and in the midst of it you get this bombshell." Jane said.

They sat there in comfortable silence for a few minutes. They both needed to sort their own thoughts. They would have stayed there longer had Maura's phone not beeped and cause them both to look in the direction of her purse.

"That may be your mother. She's bringing me fresh clothes." Maura said as she stood. As she was walking away the strangest question occurred to her that she just had to ask, "What made you want to clean and organize your apartment? It looks amazing, but it's out of character for you. It felt strange walking into it."

"Gee thanks, Maur." Jane said sarcastically. The intensity in the room a few moments ago finally breaking a little between them.

Maura was texting Angela back as she said, "I'm serious Jane. It's a huge change. Did Derek encourage you to do it?"

Jane was biting the inside of her mouth, clearly deciding if she was willing to answer the question. "Uh no, he didn't tell me to."

Maura just looked at her. She smiled a little but her look was mostly inquisitive. Now, this was just downright interesting. Why was Jane not answering? "Ok, now you have to tell me. What's with the pause?" Maura joked.

"I was a little frustrated," Jane said not looking at Maura.

"What do you mean frustrated?" Maura asked, her tone playful on purpose to tug at Jane's sudden shyness.

"Uh, God Maura. I was sexually frustrated, ok? I just needed a distraction and that stupid revamp of my apartment took weeks between work and workouts. It just… It just helped. Leave it alone, ok?" Jane said acting totally exhausted by the question in an effort to hide her embarrassment.

"Oh, Jane." Maura said with a playful, pretend tone of concern, "Did no one tell you there are much better ways to curve that frustration?"

Jane felt the challenge and responded without totally thinking it through. "I tried Maura. It didn't work."

Maura smirked at the unspoken admission of Jane's words. Jane was frustrated. Jane wanted Maura. Jane wanted Maura so much that getting herself off wasn't enough. Maura knew it wasn't the time or place but arousal stirred in her at the thought of Jane touching herself. Of Jane wanting her.

Jane took Maura's silence as an invitation to continue. "I don't know. I know you think sex is just sex and I shouldn't feel guilty, but I do. I couldn't keep it up with her when I knew it was simply a distraction."

Maura snapped her eyes to Jane's. Her focus was intense, unwavering. Those were not the words she was expecting. Someone else touching Jane, tasting her. It felt unbearable, the heat of her jealousy swirled through her stomach. She had been keeping the beast growing inside her at bay. She had been challenging herself to stay patient, to focus on Jane's recovery and this case first, but Jane's words uncaged her restraint.

Jane was sure she saw jealousy raging in Maura's gaze. She had never seen such intensity from Maura before. It was powerful and God, insanely sexy. She didn't know how to categorize it.

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

The flush in Jane's face, the accelerated heart rate coming across the monitor, the way her eyes began to hint at a shade of black instead of brown was like pressing a 'Go' button inside of Maura. She nearly pounced forward like a panther hunting its prey. Maura reached out her hand to Jane's cheek and then ran it down the column of Jane's throat possessively. She felt the heat of Jane's skin and Jane's heartbeat vibrated from her pulse point, still pinging loudly across the machine. Maura continued her hand's journey down and across Jane's collarbone and then used a single finger to glide along the top edges of Jane's hospital gown.

In a voice laced with sex, Maura said, "This might sting a little."

Jane had been fighting her body's reaction, the way it felt like she may cum just from the way Maura had been touching her. She gave a confused look at Maura's words. Before she could ask Maura what she meant, she felt Maura's hand slip slightly into her gown and tug at the small heart rate monitor that had been taped to her chest. Jane jumped a little when it came off her skin.

"We'll only have a minute or two before they realize," Maura said again. The sultry in her voice made Jane's legs tremble. She was thankful she was sitting on a bed.

Maura grabbed Jane's face with both hands and kissed Jane hard on the mouth. It wasn't sweet or tender, it was executed purely with desire. She wanted Jane to feel the need pulsing through her veins. If there had been any worry that the way Jane had made Maura feel the first time they kissed was a fluke, this kissed removed any doubt. Maura had never in her life felt her body react so quickly and so deeply as it did the moment Jane's lips were on hers again.

When Maura pulled away they were both breathless. Jane watched Maura's breasts heave, her face flushed with need. Jane understood now why Maura pulled the monitor off of her. Her heartbeat pounded, but not as much in her chest as between her legs. Jane wasn't willing to let Maura step away. She reached out and pulled on Maura's blouse to get Maura to lean back down. She heard a slight rip sound when she tugged so hard but she didn't care. When Maura's face was back within her reach she pulled Maura towards her, running her hands around Maura's neck. Jane bit at Maura's bottom lip and then ran her tongue over it before kissing her again with a searing need. Maura moaned into Jane's mouth. Jane whimpered in response when Maura's moan echoed in her stomach and caused wetness to begin to pool between her thighs.

Maura needed to win this, she needed to ruin Jane for anyone else. No one else could be kissed like this by Jane. No one else could touch her or taste her ever again. Maura was on a mission to claim Jane as hers. Maura ran her tongue across Jane's lip demanding access to Jane's mouth. When Jane's lips parted Maura ran her hands through Jane's hair, tilting her head, and using her tongue to deepen the kiss. She moaned again at the taste of Jane. The heat of Jane's mouth. Maura felt her nipples harden and her clit throb. She had meant to claim Jane and instead she was offering herself up as Jane's to ravish. She wanted nothing more than Jane to take her right then and now.

Maura pulled back slightly and pivoted to suck on Jane's earlobe. She then whispered, "I don't like the thought of someone else touching you." As she said this her left hand that had been in Jane's hair ran down Jane's throat again, then down her chest where Maura possessively guided her fingers across Jane's left breast. She squeezed and felt Jane's hard nipple against her palm. Her journey continued as she raked her fingers down Jane's sternum and across Jane's abs.

"Oh God Maura" Jane moaned. Jane sat up further and leaned into Maura to begin to kiss down her neck. Maura's knees gave a little as Jane found her pulse point and bit down at it. Jane had been terrified that kissing Maura in her apartment had been a mistake. That Maura would run. And then when Maura found out she was in love with her she thought that had sealed her coffin, but if this was death please let her never wake. She began to reach as best she could for Maura's ass, to pull her onto the bed when she heard a noise.

The door flew open as Angela entered the room with a nurse in close pursuit. Both Jane and Maura jumped.

"Jane!" Angela exclaimed. "Oh, baby you're awake! I'm so happy to see you up." Angela came over to try to hug Jane even with things in her hands. She then went to hand the hanging clothes and small bag she brought to Maura, who had stepped back from the bed and was holding onto the window sill.

Angela knew what she had walked in on, but the evidence was even more apparent when she was up close to Maura. A blush still remained on her cheeks, her lipstick smeared, and her blouse raveled. Maura looked as if she wasn't even aware Angela was near her. Her eyes were glued to Jane.

"Here Maura," Angela said to get Maura's attention. Maura looked at her, but it felt like she didn't even see her. "I think I grabbed the items you asked for. And this is the bag from your car. It looks like you might want to freshen up." Angela said playfully and then winked.

Meanwhile, the nurse was fussing at Jane. "You can't just unplug these Jane. It's dangerous. We need to be monitoring you. How in the world did this come off anyway?"

"Oh well, I couldn't stand the beeping. It was loud." Jane said, but she never took her eyes of Maura.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: Thank you for the follows, comments, and love. It's been really fun taking this journey with you guys! Writing this reminds me how much I miss our favorite ladies. If you are enjoying this, please keep letting me know. I want to make sure I'm keeping you guys entertained and on your toes. This has been such a great opportunity for me to practice dialogue, I'm bummed I didn't run into this sooner. I intend to keep the story going as long as I have readers willing to keep following. (Fair warning I don't go crazy on editing because I have to pick my battles on time management. Hopefully, it's not too distracting when I mess something up from time to time)**

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The rest of the morning Jane found literally everyone's presence an annoyance, well except for Maura's. They were in her way. She absolutely understood that no one had any idea what they were keeping her from, but that did not make it any less frustrating. The nurse kept talking to her, asking her questions about how she was feeling, and all she wanted to do was to yell in frustrated.

Korsak, Frost, and Frankie sat with Maura as the four of them went through the details of going through Jane's personal life. Maura chose not to tell them that she had already given Jane most of the story. She was worried she may have forgotten details, she told Jane, so Jane did the best she could to show patience as they shared everything with her again. While they spoke Jane stared out at the window most of the time, but sometimes she would look right at Maura. She took in Maura's new change of clothes. She wondered if Maura had asked for them specifically or if her mother just picked them out of random. The navy pencil skirt was perfectly formed to Maura's ass. She had noticed when Maura had been walking around the room earlier. Her light blue blouse had a oh so wonderful swoop neck that shared enough of Maura's skin that it was maddening to Jane. She might even list this as one of her new favorite tops on Maura.

Frankie's voice pulled Jane from her daydream about the skin underneath Maura's blouse. "Earth to Janie?" Frankie said again.

"Huh?" Jane said. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a knowing smirk play across Maura's lips. She'd been caught.

"I said please say something. You know none of us wanted to dig all this up, but we had to. You know that, right Janie?" Frankie said. The guilt and discomfort in his voice snapped Jane back into the conversation.

"I get it, Frankie. I would have done the same if it was any of you. It was the only way. I'm just angry I was pulled from the conversation. I had every intention of sharing what I figured out when we got back to the station. While we were at Derek's, I was worried the room was bugged or the house. It didn't feel smart to share it when whoever this is could potentially hear." Jane stated.

"Which brings us to the matter at hand Jane." Korsak said. Jane watched Maura perk up which indicated to her this was now new information and she should pay attention. "We need to put Maura in protective custody. She is obviously the target here and we need to keep her safe."

"NO" Maura nearly shouted and made everyone in the room jump. She worked to composure herself, feeling nearly out of control of her own body. She ran her hands down her skirt, ironing out invisible wrinkles with her palms. "I'm absolutely not leaving Jane," she said matter of factly.

Maura sounded professional in her tone, but Jane could read the micro-expressions on Maura's face. She was scared and vulnerable. It pulled at Jane in the worst possible way. She couldn't put Maura in any more danger, but God she couldn't stand to think she would make Maura feel the way she obviously felt right now. The prospect of Maura being pulled away clearly was messing with the doctor's emotions. While Jane was thinking Korsak continued.

"Maura I'm sorry, but it's not safe. And Jane can't protect you, look at her." He stated while pointing to Jane still sitting on the bed. That was enough to change Jane from, well, Jane to protective - don't fucking touch my best friend - Detective Rizzoli. Jane's entire demeanor changed, her body language, even sitting, gave it away even before she spoke.

"I will always protect Maura. And I'll be damned if some car accident is going to keep me out of this," Jane said. Her tone was harsh and demanding. There was no room for misinterpretation and every single person in the room knew what it was like to argue with that tone.

"Jane" Korsak stated. "You know you can't help right now"

The room went quiet. Everyone waiting to see what Jane would do or say. What surprised everyone was the way Jane was staring at Maura, tilting her head.

"Jane, what is it?" Frost said. He knew that face, the face Jane was making. She just connected another dot.

Jane put her finger up for a minute. She was looking at Maura but her eyes were slightly ticking back and forth as if she was reading or pulling a memory forward from the past. After a few more moments, with everyone staring at her, Jane finally spoke, "Frost can you hand me the crime scene photos from Derek's house."

Frost went into his bag, pulled out the file, and then handed it to Jane. She flipped through the pictures until she got what she was looking for.

"Maura I need your help but this might be a little weird for you," Jane stated. She looked into Maura's eyes for acknowledgment.

"Of course Jane. Is it the crime scene?" She asked about to get out of her seat to share a look at the photos with Jane.

"Stay seated for a second and bear with me here." Jane said. She very visibility collected herself, she was uncomfortable but was working on guarding that behind the exterior of Detective Rizzoli.

"Do you remember the Children's Literacy Banquet we went to two years ago?" Jane asked.

"Well I've been to a few over the past couple of years Jane you'll have to be more specific," Maura stated

"Uh, Maura I'm quite sure you've only invited me to one. You surprised me with that tailored suit to sweet talk me into going." Jane said.

Maura smiled dimples and all, "Oh yes I do. I knew you wouldn't go last minute if I told you that you had to wear a dress. You looked amazing."

Jane blushed not expecting the compliment, but continued as if it didn't effect her the way it did. "Last minute before we left you spilled wine on your shoes. You had to change them and on the drive over you were being self-conscious about how they looked with your dress. Do you remember?"

Maura thought for a minute. She had actually totally forgotten about that. She looked at Jane with softer eyes, nearly bashful at the realization of how much notice Jane put into her no matter what she was doing.

"Yes I remember," Maura said, she herself blushed a little at the memory. "When we got out of the car at the banquet you told me the shoes I was wearing were actually one of your favorite pairs of mine."

Jane continued to try to control her reactions to Maura. "Correct"

Jane looked around the room and everyone was intently listening. No judgment, just detectives doing their job.

"Jane, what does that have to do with anything?" Maura asked sincerely.

"Stick with me, Maura. I'm thinking through this as I'm asking it." Jane said as she clearly went back into her own world of thought for a moment.

"It's her process." Frost quietly whispered to Maura, "She asks questions she sometimes knows the answer to in order to hear the answer. I think it helps her decide if the details she is worried about matters. We are kind of used to it. It makes for an interesting ride" Maura smiled at him and looked back at Jane. She enjoyed being part of this, even though she was a little worried and confused about where it was going.

Jane was chewing on her lip clearly ready to keep going. "The skirt you were wearing the first time we meet. That's the same one you wore for the office Christmas party that year, correct?" Jane asked not looking up.

"Oh yes, it's a Marchesa. I love that skirt."

"Mmm," Jane said out loud, clearly more to herself than anyone else. It struck Maura again how detailed Jane's questions were. Maura knew it was pretty normal for people to be able to pull forward pieces of a memory, like what someone of importance to them was wearing the first time they met. That part wasn't too surprising, though very sweet. The fact, however, that Jane had noticed in enough detail to know when she wore the same skirt again, at the Christmas party that year, was a pretty powerful statement. Jane had been paying attention. Jane had been paying attention for a long time.

Jane exhaled again. "Last question. Do you remember that case we had about three months back with the young teenage girls? Afterwards, you and I snuck out to have a quiet dinner." Jane said.

"Hey! You said you went home." Frost said playfully.

Maura smiled brightly before she responded, "Yes Jane, of course, I remember"

Jane could see the memory of the night play in Maura's head. She wondered if it meant as much to Maura as it had to her. "Do you remember the top you were wearing?"

Maura pondered for a second. "I think I just had on a white button down. Right?"

"Yes. You had on the one with the black buttons." Jane stated back more to herself than to Maura.

After another few moments, Jane whispered in a defeated tone, "Fuck." As she turned the photo around of Nicole placed on Derek's couch Jane said, "Maur, do these clothes look familiar to you?"

Everyone in the room stared from Jane's face to the picture to Maura and back. Maura's gasp was enough to spark Korsak to speak.

"Are you telling me these are the items you were just talking about?" Korsak questioned.

"I don't know if they are a perfect match, but they are very similar." Jane said.

Maura took the photo in her hands. "I would have never put that together Jane. I would need to check the clothes at the lab to be sure, but that skirt looks like my Marchesa."

"Wait this guy took her clothes and put them on the victim?" Frankie stated in disbelief.

"No, not exactly," Jane said. "They aren't actually Maura's. She's wearing the shoes we were talking about right now." Jane stated matter of factly but Maura found herself blushing once again with Jane taking such detailed notice of her. She hadn't even thought about the fact she was wearing the exact same pair and she was in them.

"Ok. So they aren't Maura's clothes. How do you know that this outfit is significant then Jane? Just because you recognized them from memories doesn't mean anything. Maybe you actually have a growing taste for a better wardrobe." Korsak both asked and joked. Frost and Frankie both giggled a little.

"Watch yourself, Korsak," Jane said joking but it came across more watered down. She was thinking again. "No these clothes are purposeful. Remember we asked if Nicole was in these clothes when Maura was examining her? She came in with jeans on. The killer dressed her in these clothes and he did it to send a message." Jane looked up at Korsak and then continued. "This isn't me just pulling these items from my memory" she paused and looked back down, "These are my memories."

Everyone just stared at Jane waiting for her to continue. Maura noticed Jane was struggling. It was clear Jane was embarrassed about whatever she was going to say, so Maura approached her.

"Jane," she said quietly. Jane looked up into Maura's eyes, her forehead furrowed. Maura watched as anger, then anxiety, and then fear flashed through Jane's eyes. "Just talk to me. Just look at me and walk me through this. It's just you and me. I want to know why these were important. If they are important to you, they are important to me." Maura said as she pointed at the clothing items. Maura decided the only way Jane was going to be completely transparent was if she made the moment intimate.

Frost and Frankie exchanged a knowing look. No one could calm Jane Rizzoli down like Maura Isles. And the reason why had, at least a piece of it, became revealed to them in just the past 24 hours. It was hard not to feel like they were once again invading pieces of Jane life they had no business being inside of.

"Ok, Ok," Jane said with a few more breaths. "When I started talking with Derek it wasn't just about realizing that I was in love with you." Jane paused realizing the words she was saying for the first time that day. She gasped slightly. She wasn't stating just facts. She and Maura fell into a silent moment, the room's energy changed just a little.

Maura leaned in for only Jane to hear, "We'll talk about that later. You need to stop looking at me like that or I cannot promise I'll keep my hands to myself."

Jane gave a shuttering breath, Maura made her point. "When I realized how I was feeling Derek challenged me to dig into it more. I started doing journal entries. Do you remember I told you I originally intended you to read one before I had to share all of this?" Jane said to Maura, ignoring the fact she knew Korsak wouldn't like that her original intention was not to share all of this right away.

"Yes, I remember," Maura said. "What does that have to do with the clothes Jane?"

"I'm getting there Maur. This is just hard." Jane said. "Well long story short I guess it's that I realized I'd been in love with you for a long time. Far before it ever dawned on me. That was part of what made everything so hard. I couldn't sort myself out when my feelings began to be so much more than friendship… When you became the person I compared everyone else to."

Jane could see Maura's breath starting to get deeper. The shift in her breathing was gradual but painful for Jane as she watches Maura's breasts move ever so slightly more with each breath she took. She couldn't keep eye contact because she was embarrassed and she couldn't look at Maura's body because she was fighting her impulses to grab Maura, so she looked back at the picture of Nicole.

"These pieces of your clothing are favorites of mine. What I didn't realize until my journal assignments were that they are favorites not just because you look so incredibly beautiful in them, but also because they are symbols of key moments for me. They remind me, whether I was conscious of it or not, of how strongly I feel about you. How strongly I've felt about you."

"Jane" Korsak's voice broke Jane's trance of the picture. "I'm so sorry we are putting you through this. Can you tell us about the journey entries? Why these moments and these pieces of clothing would have been important for the killer to use?"

"Ya um" Jane paused. "They are actually three different entries. The skirt is from when I met Maura for the first time as I mentioned. I think about that a lot. It's the last entry I wrote. It's from a week or so ago" Jane paused.

"Is there anything else besides you meeting her in that entry?" Frost asked. "Not that that isn't significant" he was trying to use his words carefully, "but it doesn't feel like something that would upset you to share"

"Ha," Jane laughed. That was fair to say and she said so, "That's fair Frost. That's fair. I'm sorry I'm dragging this out, guys. This is just really hard. I feel really exposed." He nodded.

"You're ok Janie. We are here to listen, no judgment. Plus, shit it's Maura. No one in this room is surprised. I can promise you that." Frankie said trying to put his sister at ease.

Jane took a moment to look around the room and all three men nodded at her. "Well let's talk about THAT later" Jane joked and the tension broke a little from her shoulders.

"The entry talks about me questioning if I hadn't been in love with Maura since the first time I met her," Jane admitted. Jane heard the hitch in Maura's breath. She didn't want to draw attention to it, but she made sure to note it for herself to think about later.

"Ok well, that does make sense then." Said Frost writing a few thoughts down from his notebook he had pulled from his blazer. "What about these fancy shoes?" Frost said pointing to Maura's feet. "What journal entry had those?"

"That entry was about the night of the banquet. It's one of my favorite memories of Maura. How beautiful she looked, how captivated the entire room was of her. And yet, literally the entire night, Maura's focus had been on me. I, um…" Jane's blush was vibrant in contrast to the white hospital gown around her neck. "It's one of the few times in my life I felt beautiful."

"Janie.." Frankie started clearly to comfort his sister.

"Oh god Frankie please don't," Jane said. Her detective stance in her shoulders coming back. "I don't need a pep talk. I'm telling you what I said in the entry. That's all. Let's take this as facts and try not make it worse for me, ok?" Jane asked.

"Ya ya Jane, we got it," Frankie said. His eyes showed her remorse regardless of his words.

"Jane" Maura said quietly. "This shirt. That was the last time we had dinner together. Like actually had dinner together." She was speaking only to Jane now, the rest of the room temporarily disappearing again.

"Yes, it was," Jane said just as quickly back.

"Why is this significant? Something happened that night didn't it?" Maura said realizing for the first time.

"It um." Jane started to falter but decided she just needed to suck it up. She looked straight into Maura's eyes that showed love and need and something else she couldn't quite identify. "Maur that night, when we got back to your house and were walking in - that's when I realized how I really felt about you. It hit me like a ton of bricks and I haven't been able to turn off that understanding ever since."

Maura couldn't stop herself. Her heart was beating wildly in her chest. Jane was just telling stories, stating facts so everyone understood what this lunatic knew, but she still couldn't help it. They felt like declarations. Over and over again Jane telling her how much she loved her. Jane telling her how much she paid attention to even the little details. Maura felt like she was a love-struck teenager all over again. The butterflies fluttered around in her stomach. The need to touch Jane was too much.

So when Jane told her how much that night meant to her - the night Maura had replayed in her head dozens of times, even when she should have been thinking about someone else, she had to be closer. Maura's emotions put her body on autopilot and she reached for Jane. Each hand holding Jane's face, her thumbs mirrored each other as she lightly stroked them on Jane's cheeks and then she leaned in and kissed her. It was tender and loving, meant to express words she hadn't quite formulated.

Korsak cleared his throat.

"Oh gosh. I'm sorry, that was unprofessional." Maura said. Jane looked down at her hands.

Korsak just laughed. "No, it's more that I'm trying to keep us on task." He was playful in his tone and Maura appreciated his sensitivity to her.

"Something else is bugging you, Jane. What is it?" Frost asked. He knew Jane had more to say. He could tell by the way she wasn't settled, as if she was still rolling facts around in her head trying to get them just right.

"Well here's the thing. My original thought was this guy broke into Derek's to get to my personal life. To dig into facts about me, steal my file, and learn about my vulnerabilities. I assumed." She paused looking at Frost, "I guess we all assumed that this guy had no idea about Maura until the break-in, but these clothes tell a different story."

"Jesus," Frankie said without thinking.

"It would have taken time to match those clothes. Wow, he's even more detailed and meticulous than we thought." Frost said stunned.

"Jane why break in then? Why this whole thing if they already had your journals?" Maura said, clearly upset.

"I'm not sure Maur," Jane said honestly. "My best guess right now is he did it to show us he could. We were distracted by what he wanted us to be distracted by - my file. There are more clues we are missing here, I can feel it."

"We are going to need to go through all the evidence again. Now that we know the full story, now that we understand the details the killer understands, we need to take a look with fresh eyes." Korsak stated.

"I'm coming with you," Jane said. She sat up more and then moved to swing her legs over the side of the bed. Maura stepped aside without even thinking, an instinct to allow Detective Rizzoli to lead the way no matter the circumstances.

"You most certainly are not!" Korsak shouted back. "You need your rest."

"No Korsak I need to catch this guy before he gets to Maura. I need to figure out what else he knows, how he knows it, and who the hell he is. I can't sit here and do that." Jane spouted back.

"Jane," Maura said more softly. "You really should rest. You heard the doctor no strenuous activities."

"Maura, please. I can't sit here. I need to look at the photos. I need to run through the evidence again and again. This is personal."

"Jane I understand this is personal but" Korsak started but Jane cut him off.

"No Korsak. This is personal. What I mean is that these clues, the things he's set up or the things that could help us figure out who he is, I'm worried I'm the only one who could find them. And that has nothing to do with anyone's lack of skill. I mean I'm good, don't get me wrong." Jane joked trying to lighten the mood just a bit. It worked because Korsak laughed. "But we are better as a team. The thing is you wouldn't have known about those clothes, the intimate details of why, without me. And what if they mean more than just fucking with me? I'm beginning to believe there are layers of clues we are missing. He did each little thing on purpose, we need to understand that purpose before we can ever figure out who this is."

"We need her with us Korsak" Frost stated matter of factly. Korsak looked at him pissed to hear him speak that out into the room - as if Jane needed any more egging on. "I'm not happy about it. I wish we could do this for her and let her rest, but she's right. The farthest I had gotten with those clothes is that he wanted to make a point, but I had no idea what. That's not enough. He's fucking with her and we need to know how." Frost continued.

"Maura?" Korsak asked looking straight at her. "Let's assume I agree with this insane idea of letting Jane leave the hospital. Is it even possible? And will it endanger her life?"

Maura realized he wasn't just asking her for her medical advice. He was also asking her because she wouldn't be able to lie to him or Jane. She felt a lot of pressure, but she closed her eyes and answered honestly. "With a head injury, she needs to be monitored frequently." Maura looked Jane in the eyes. Jane sitting up with her feet dangling off the bed made her and Maura nearly in eye contact. She knew Jane was on the verge of leaving without medical clearance. "I would need to talk to her doctor and look at her latest scans before I could say either way."

"Maur come on. I can't stay here." Jane said.

Maura put her hand on Jane's knee. "Let's do this. If you can shower without feeling dizzy and you'll let me talk to the doctor, I'll consider signing you out under my care."

"YES Maura," Jane said fist pumping up, feeling victorious.

"Jane to be clear I'm not promising anything. If there is anything significant to be worried about I won't feel comfortable doing that." Maura stated. She needed Jane to hear the truth and worry in her words. "Can you agree that you'll stay if I feel too uncomfortable with you leaving?" Maura stated again.

Jane looked into Maura's eyes and understand Maura was trying to help her. She also knew if Maura hadn't been here she would have just demanded to be let go with or without clearance.

"Ok," Jane said. She felt guilty, though, that she wasn't sure she meant it.

"Korsak is that good enough for you?" Jane asked.

"Maura can't lie so I wasn't questioning her." Korsak stated giving Jane an eyebrow. "What about Maura though? Jane, we aren't sure yet if you can't handle yourself. You aren't at full strength which means we need to be smart and have a plan."

While the team worked on a plan, Maura called to have the doctor come through to evaluate Jane. She knew this was going to be a tricky situation, but as long as she felt she could handle it she was willing to do this for Jane. If she were honest with herself, she'd do anything for Jane.

* * *

Frankie and Korsak left to continue work back at the station. Frost stayed behind with very specific instructions that Jane could only leave with an OK from Maura. Angela had been in and out over the past hour driving Jane completely batty but she tried to remain patient. Angela had helped Jane shower, openly and loudly fretting the entire time, but Jane made it through without a dizzy spell. Angela had also gone to Jane's and retrieved clothes for her. "I wasn't sure what you wanted, but this was already put together. It looks new Janie, this color will look incredible on you."

Jane looked up at the suit her mother had brought with her. It was one of two tailored suits Jane owned, but this one (unlike the one Maura bought her a few years back) Jane had purchased on her own. It had been part of her therapy with Derek. With all of her workouts and less time for junk eating, Jane had bulked in muscle but slimmed in the waist. Her already baggier suits no longer fit. She had bought this as a gift to herself, but never wore it.

The doctor, though hesitant to do so, cleared her to leave but only under specific instructions and strict supervision from Maura. She was not to go out in the field. She was required to rest every few hours. She was required to listen to Maura's instructions. And all of this sounded much better than being at the hospital. Maura had always been her doctor, no cute pun intended. Bruised ribs, broken nose, a few stitches - it didn't matter. Jane went to Maura's, not the hospital.

Once Maura had given the ok, Jane pulled Frost aside to talk. Jane was worried that Maura and herself shouldn't travel together from the hospital. She felt it would be too good for the killer to pass up. Despite all their efforts to keep Jane being there under wraps, she wasn't convinced he didn't know. Frost would escort Maura to the prescient and Jane would follow close behind with officers introduced to her only by Frost.

After much protest from Maura, she finally got her to leave with Frost. It was time for her to get dressed. Jane stared at the suit her mother had hung on the shower pole in her hospital bathroom. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed her reflection for the first time that morning. With all the commotion of keeping her mother calm while she showered, she never had looked over at the mirror. Her left side of her ribs was a deep purple bruise and she had a large gash held together by butterfly bandages above her left eyebrow. The bump on her head and her sounding hairline was a colorful array of bruising at different stages of healing.

So much had happened and she had a lot to be angry about. She felt it bubbling around the edges of every interaction she had today, but she also felt freer. Her initial reaction to that was to punish herself for feeling free in the midst of all this. She was, however, trying to remember what Derek had been teaching her. That she was allowed feelings too. And while she didn't have to share them, she should allow herself to experience them. So as she dressed she allowed herself to smile. There was a lot to talk about with Maura, once all this was over. This wouldn't be easy, but damn did it feel simple. Maura was the only person Jane wanted. She was the only person Jane had wanted for a very long time.

Jane dressed and put some additional mousse in her hair to try to maintain the curls. She ran her eyes over the tailored suit and deep purple tailored button down. She couldn't believe she'd never put it on after buying it. She had to admit she looked good. The cut of the suit was flattering, showing off the leanness of her waist and legs. Her arms and shoulders have been developing as of late and the fitted cut of the new suit hinted at the muscles underneath. She had been unsure she could pull off feeling confident when this guy had gotten to her so easily, but for some reason looking at herself now, she felt powerful. She had overcome the embarrassment of her story being exposed to her colleagues. She was overcoming the pain of the accident. Even now she stood, dressed, and unbroken. She was Detective Jane Rizzoli dammit. And if this guy thought he could come after her Dr. Isles he had another thing coming. She nodded at herself. Game On.


	9. Chapter 9

**Author Note: Hey everyone! Thank you for your patience. I want to warn you about a few things 1) This chapter is going to get HOT 2) More detective work next chapter, this one I couldn't wait any longer to really get the flames burning 3) I didn't have time to edit at all so a little grace today, please! More by end of the week! THANK YOU for reading. THANK YOU for the reviews. THANK YOU for your mutual love of Rizzles. Ready for some heat?!**

* * *

The day flew by quickly from that point on. Korsak and Frankie had moved the evidence back up into the homicide department. Now that they knew the killer was leaving clues, they needed to show face they were working on the case. Jane was a little antsy about it when she arrived but she trusted Korsak's gut on this. Maura had a few autopsies lined up for the day, but that didn't mean she didn't show up like clockwork every two hours to check on Jane.

Around 7 pm Maura did her final check in with Jane. After much protest and a lot of back and forth that Jane should be leaving too, Maura was on her way home, driving her own car for the first time in a few days. Jane had promised she would only be staying until 8 pm. Part of her release was based on her not pulling all-nighters, regardless of the work to be done. Her brain needed to heal, she needed rest or she would be no good to anyone. Maura had hinted more than once she would prefer Jane to come to her house after work, but didn't want to push it. She told, in case Jane chose to go home, that she'd be at her apartment at 7 am sharp to do a full examination before she could go back to work.

When Maura arrived home officers were stationed outside her house, the police car that had been following her home honked at her as if to say goodbye and then continued down the street. Once Maura parked in her driveway she began to collect her things inside the car. She heard a knock on the window and nearly jumped out of her skin. She had been so distracted by her thoughts she hadn't noticed the officer walk up to her from across the street.

"Dr. Isles," The officer said with a nod. "I'm Officer Williams. I am part of your evening detail. I have an individual here who has been waiting for you to arrive. He says he knows you, but I wanted to confirm for your safety.

It took Maura a minute to notice the second man standing behind the officer. When she made eye contact with him he finally spoke, "Maura what's going on? Please tell this guy I'm completely fine to be here."

Jack. He had a look of shock and bewilderment. She felt an insane amount of guilt in the moment. Guilt that she had completely forgotten about him. Guilt that he was here and she didn't want him to be. Guilt that he was here and she was pretty sure Jane wouldn't be thrilled by it. She knew, though, that she owed him acknowledgment. He had asked her to call, she hadn't. He'd done nothing wrong and had always cared for her. He deserved an explanation, a conversation at the very least.

"Thank you, Officer Williams. He is welcome to stay." Maura finally said. She rolled her window back up, turned off the car, and got out. Jack immediately pulled her into a forced embrace. She had been unprepared and even more so when he pushed his lips to hers. When he went to try to deepen the already uncomfortable movement of his lips, she gently pushed him away. She didn't want to make a scene in front of her house and in Jack's defense he had no idea how much had transpired in her life over the past couple of days.

Jack looked at her slightly deflated but she just patted him on the chest to try to soften the blow. "Let's go inside Jack, I'm exhausted."

He looked at her for a moment, studying her as if to see she was telling the truth. It felt odd, Maura knew Jack was aware she couldn't lie. After a few moments, he seemed satisfied with his assessment and said, "Yes of course. Let me just grab a few things out of my car."

Maura nodded and turned to the Williams to be escorted inside. Jane had been crystal clear that Maura was not entering that house without someone going in with her and doing a quick sweep. She handed the officer her house keys and followed close behind him. She stood in the doorway, with the door open, while he did a quick surveillance of the downstairs. Once he moved to upstairs Maura was no longer patient enough to wait. She walked into her kitchen to put her things down.

"What is going on Maura?" Jack said as he entered the house. She looked at him noticing he had flowers in his hand and what looked like a bag of takeout hanging in his other.

Williams came downstairs and looked at Jack with a tight, clenched jaw. It struck Maura that it felt like distaste of some kind. She couldn't be sure, though, and honestly, the officer could simply just be nervous as she was sure Jane probably picked each of the individuals on her detail personally. She'd seen the way most officers both respected and feared Jane. It made her smile a little without meaning to.

"Dr. Isles the house has been cleared. I'll be outside if you need me. I'm sorry but unless I know them, all other guests will also be escorted to your door." Williams said matter of factly.

Again Maura nodded. The officer proceeded to give Jack one more once over and then walked out. Jack nearly snarled at him. It shocked Maura that he would be so rude. Jack stomped over to the counter nearly forcing the flowers into her hands.

"I was expecting a quiet night with you." He snapped a little.

"Did we make plans Jack?" Maura asked. Sincerely surprised at his comment. She was worried she had forgotten about standing plans in the midst of everything going on.

"No, not exactly. When you didn't call I assumed you were swamped. What better way to help you relax than to bring you some food." He looked at her and then began to smirk, "And then spoil you with some dessert."

Maura may not be great with most social cues, but Jack's innuendo was crystal clear, one he had used more than once. Maura visibly shuttered. The idea of anyone else but Jane now touching her repulsed her. She was absolutely and utterly ruined - and they hadn't even had sex. Which made her brain bunny trail into thinking about what it would be like for Jane's naked body to consume her, to feel Jane inside her, to be the source of Jane's pleasure. She cheeks and chest visibly warmed, a pink blush spreading quickly as her heart rate picked up.

Unfortunately, her shutter and blush were misunderstood by the man standing in her kitchen. Jack responded by grabbing Maura at the waist and lifting her around his hips. His movement was quick, one that caused Maura to respond by holding on simply to not fall. When Maura went to protest her voice was drowned out by Jack's mouth on hers, his tongue pressing her words back into her throat.

A ringtone blared through the house causing Jack to pause and turn his head toward the sound. From there everything happened even faster.

"Jane?" He asked his eyes at the front door.

Maura had pushed him and slide down him now that his arms relax, his eyes focused on Jane and not her. "Oh God, Jane," Maura said while she watched the shock and obvious pain flash across Jane's face. "No Jane it's not what you think." Maura tried to continue.

Jane's revealed hurt in her eyes only lasted for a few seconds. Her phone rang again.

"Rizzoli," Jane said. Her voice was harsh and it matched her now hardened expression.

Maura felt sick. Jack's touch had made me feel nauseous and before she could even remove him from her body Jane had seen him on her. She couldn't think properly. Normally she would rant out facts of some sort, but nothing came to mind. There were too many emotions running through her to catalog, so she just stood there staring at Jane. She was terrified of what Jane might be thinking. She then heard her phone begin to ring. She quickly spun around, pushing Jack further away from her and reached into her purse.

"This is Dr. Isles," she stated.

"Hi, Dr. Isles, it's Korsak. Dr. Patterson just finished the autopsy. Nothing out of the ordinary. I thought you'd want to know. Frost is letting Jane know as well."

Since the case was far too personal for her Maura had no choice but to call in another M.E. to assist. While Dr. Patterson had only been helping in a different precinct for a few months, Maura felt he was a clear number two if she herself could not do anything. She had been too emotionally exhausted to stay and she knew she was just going to go over the body again once he had completed tonight.

"Thank you, Vince."

Maura watched as Jane spun on her heel without so much as a word to Jack or herself, and left. Maura's entire being had become numb. Most of her had wished that Vince was calling to say Patterson found something, that she would be called away from her kitchen and Jane would be forced into the same room as her. Unfortunately, that was not the case.

Maura hung up with Korsak and stared at her phone for a minute. She wanted to call Jane. She wanted to run after Jane. She wanted to sleep. She wanted to be working. She wanted to be anywhere but her kitchen with Jack right now.

Jack's voice broke through her thoughts. "Maura let's eat. Let me give you something to eat."

She simply nodded and sat down at the counter, still staring at her phone in her hands. She wasn't sure what to do right now. She could barely keep her eyes open. She could feel her body shutting down. She hadn't eaten. She hadn't slept. She hadn't even had time to sort through the last few days emotionally. And maybe worse than anything else, they hadn't caught the bad guy yet.

Jack put food in front of her and she whispered, "Thank you."

She had no willpower to fight him. She had no energy to have the conversation she needed to have.

They sat in silence as they ate. Maura willing herself to stay awake. Jack must have noticed because he spoke finally.

"Let's get you up to bed," Jack said. It was sweet enough, but it wasn't what she wanted. Jack had made it sound like the two of them would be going to her bedroom. That just wasn't going to happen. Not now, not ever again.

"You're right I'm very tired. I'll clean up here Jack, why don't you head out," she said nonchalantly. She tried to do what Jane always did. Give a direction without stating the obvious.

"You don't want me to stay?" Jack said surprised.

Maura sighed, "No Jack I don't. I'm exhausted. I just really want to go to sleep."

"Maura clearly something is going on. I should stay. I need to stay with you." Jack said.

"Jack I think you should go." Maura didn't have the energy nor the patience for this.

"Maura! Tell me what is going on right now!" Jack shouted at her. "You aren't acting like yourself. I had cops basically get friendly with me outside your house earlier. Jane was able to come and go without an escort. And why did she leave anyway? I have every right to touch my girlfriend. She shouldn't be such a priss about affection." He voice was demanding and snarky. His face showed waves of jealousy and disgust.

Maura stood from her seat at the counter to square up to him. She was still shorter, of course, but with her heels on she at least got closer to eye contact. She straightened her shoulders and prepared to fight.

"Let's get one thing straight very quickly Jack. It is not my job to stroke your ego. Do you'd like to know what is going on? Fine. My best friend was in an accident and then had to stay in a coma so her brain could heal. Why? Because there is a killer targeting Jane. A killer. You know what that is right? It's a person who wants to KILL her." Maura snarked. She didn't know where it was coming from, but damn it felt good to yell.

"And that killer is also targeting me. So yes. A cop frisked you when you showed up uninvited. And yes I'm not myself. I'm tired. I'm scared. I've been working nonstop. And now, despite just wanting to go to bed, I have to sit here and have this conversation with you."

Maura could feel anger rolling through her chest. She knew she would regret her behavior later. She would be embarrassed for losing her cool, for acting out. But right now... Right now felt liberating.

"Maura I'm so sorry. I didn't know. How could I have known?" He said back to her. He went to reach for her, to pull her into an embrace but she stuck out her hand to his chest and took another step back.

"Jack no" Maura said, making sure the hand gesture was as clear as possible. "I have to be honest with you. This." She pointed back and forth between them. "Us. It's not working for me. And it's nothing you did, I promise. And it's not tonight. I just..." she stopped not ready to share with him feelings she herself hadn't had the chance to fully enjoy on her own, "I'm sorry I have to break this off."

Jack searched her eyes. She knew he was upset, but she watched his face try to hide that behind a neutral expression.

"I see," he finally responded. He grabbed his jacket and walked to the front door, Maura followed slowly behind him. He looked at her gently, "I'll give you a couple days to cool off and then we can talk like adults."

He twisted the knife. She knew that he knew what he was doing. She let him open the door and then closed it again.

Maura got ready for bed and then looked at her phone. She knew it wasn't fair to text Jane right now, but she couldn't help it. She sent the one message Jane would always respond to, especially during a danger case, no matter what was going on.

 _"I just want to know you're safe."_ Maura texted

 _"Safe"_ Jane sent back almost immediately.

Maura fell asleep with her phone still in her hand.

* * *

Jane really didn't sleep. She left Maura's with the worst agony raging inside her. In her mind, there was only one place to go. She went back to the precinct, her detail right behind her. She went down to the gym and decide to start taking out her rage on the bags.

Blow after blow after blow. With every jab, she thought about Jack's hands on Maura. About her legs at each side of his hips. She tormented herself with the thought of Jack tasting Maura, with Jack fucking her. Tears threatened her eyes as she punched until her hands were swollen and bloody. When she couldn't move her body anymore, she stopped. She cried in the locker room shower as she let the sweat and blood rise down the drain.

Once showered and drained of any energy left, she ate Korsak's left over's he had left in the breakroom fridge and poured over the case again. She fell asleep before she had even finished the leftovers.

* * *

"You little shit," Korsak said quietly right up at Jane's ear. His voice made her shoot up from her desk in shock.

"You ate my leftovers." He said laughing at her clear surprise in it being morning.

"Ugh, Korsak not cool. What time is it?" Jane said leaning back in her chair rubbing her eyes. She winced at the act, her hands throbbing from the torture of the night before.

"It's 7:30. I didn't expect you sleeping here, but I had a feeling you'd be in early. Frost is down in the cafe getting us all coffee."

Jane yawned a few more times and put herself together. She didn't care that she slept in her dress shirt, she simply tucked it back in right there in the bullpen like one of the guys. She pulled some bodyspray from her desk and spray just a little to freshen up. That's the most she felt like trying right now.

A few minutes later she heard Frost's voice coming from the elevator, she also heard the haunting click of heels. She watched Maura's feet gracefully glide across the bullpen. Her navy four-inch heels made her calves look incredible. Jane's eyes trailed up to the navy dress that hugged Maura's hips and breasts giving her that agonizing hourglass figure that made Jane's heart race. When her eyes made it to Maura's face, Frost and Maura had progressed nearly to her desk. The beautiful honey blonde tried smiling at Jane, but Jane couldn't keep the eye contact. The anger of last night swarmed back inside her gut. She wasn't going to run from Maura, she wasn't broken, but she was pissed. She wasn't going to pretend everything was fine.

"Hey Jane. We got coffee." Frost stated. If he noticed Jane's need to look away he did not indicate it.

"Thanks, Frost" Jane mumbled.

Jane grabbed her coffee from Frost who held it out in front of her and she softly moaned at the smell. God, she needed coffee. It was then that Maura noticed her hands.

"Jane!" Maura gasped. "Your hands."

They were swollen, with dried blood. Clearly not taken care of and slept on after the beating they took.

"It's nothing Maur," Jane stated just shrugging to play off the pain. Got a little carried away with the bags.

"Jane they could be infected. You need to come down to the lab with me and get them cleaned." Maura said. She had reached out to touch one of Jane's hands. When Jane hissed with pain Korsak gave her a look.

"Jane go downstairs and get this cleaned up. We have work to do." Korsak stated. He gave no other indication he was in the mood to argue or that they had time to waste.

Without saying anything Jane nodded and followed Maura. In the elevator, the silence was filled with breaths and unspoken hurt passing between the two of them. When they exited Maura kept going to her office but Jane stopped at the public bathroom right next to the elevator.

"I'll be right in," Jane said to Marua's back. Without waiting for a response she went in. She stood in front of the mirror and splashed water on her face. It was time for a pep talk. You have to be Detective Rizzoli right now. You can't be a wounded Jane. There is a killer out there trying to take Maura away from you. You can't fight for her if she isn't here to be fought for. And that's when something in Jane snapped. She knew how Maura had responded to her when they kissed before. She knew how much Maura wanted her. She was going to fight for her. She was going to take what was hers. She stared herself in the eyes and nodded.

Maura had a tray of supplies on her desk when Jane walked in. She turned around to look at Jane, her eyes soft with worry.

"You should be wearing gloves, Jane. You can't do this to your beautiful hands." She began to clean Jane's injuries. Jane winced as little as she could, but admittedly the cleaner still stung.

Maura went on and on with facts about why boxing gloves were invented, who had improved them over time, etc. Jane listened contently, comforted by the ramble of Maura's voice but not engaging. When Maura was done cleaning her hands, she sat down next to Jane to speak to her.

"Jane please look at me. Please talk to me. I need to talk to you about last night. I know you are hurt. I would be hurt. It wasn't what you thought it was." Maura spewed out as if she literally couldn't keep a single word inside her any longer.

Jane stood up. She was feeling something but it wasn't hurt. She didn't feel weak. She didn't feel less than. Not anymore. The boxing had helped her work that out. It was deeper, stronger than that. It was forceful. Jane stood facing Maura's desk, looking at the painting behind it like she had dozens of times when she was being thoughtful. She heard Maura stand up and close the door. Maura was trying to cage her in. She understood Maura needed to talk, but she wasn't interested in words. She felt what was bumbling inside her come to the surface and what arrived was jealousy. Intense, nearly out of control, possessiveness.

"Jane" Maura whispered again. The pleading in her voice made Jane tick just a bit, enough to turn around. Maura was leaning up against the door. Her right leg gently crossed over her left. Her hands softly held together and placed in front of her. Even in her state of nervousness, biting her lip as she tried to desperately not push Jane too far, she was a picture of elegance and grace. The image of Jack's hands running of Maura's body flashed like rage through Jane's brain. His mouth on hers. NO. Maura was going to tell her right now what she wanted and Jane wasn't going to ask with timid words.

Maura watched Jane approach her with the swagger of Detective Rizzoli. She wasn't wounded like Maura had imagined. Her eyes were fierce, nearly black. Her shoulders were squared and as she slowly walked forward it was with authority. Maura felt a shiver go down her spine. Janes' eyes left hers to travel down her body. She watched as Jane took in her lips, then her breasts, down her waist, and her legs. Maura couldn't help the arousal that began to swirl inside her stomach. What was Jane doing? Why was she looking at her like this? Didn't she want to talk about last night? God, if she kept looking at her like this she wasn't going to be able to keep her hands off of her.

Then Jane was right there. Inches away from Maura, but still not touching. They shared heat between them. Maura's heavy breath danced on Jane's face. And then Maura blinked. In one swift movement Jane bent down and when she came back up she ran her hands up Maura's calves.

"Jane" Maura whispered again. This time with a surprised whimper.

Jane's hands continued past Maura's calves, onto her toned thighs slightly pushing up Maura's skirt as they then ran around to the back of Maura. Jane grabbed Maura's ass and then lifted her into her arms. She slammed Maura against the door, holding onto her with her right hand while her left locked the door.

The sound of the lock echoed inside Maura. Her eyes were wide with surprise and arousal. She literally couldn't think. No facts came to her mind. Just Jane. Jane touching her. Jane's hands on her ass. Jane's breasts against her stomach. Jane's neck against her own breasts.

Seconds. It took seconds for Jane to create this kind of reaction in her.

Jane's left hand ran up her back and around to her neck. Jane pulled her face down to Maura's stopping right at her lips, but never actually allowing them to touch. Maura's own breath, her panting ghosted Jane's lips. And then she heard it. Jane's voice had dropped an octave lower. It dripped with sex.

"Do you have any idea how jealous I was to see your legs wrapped around him like this?" Jane husked against Maura's lips. She pressed into Maura harder, moving Maura's skirt up higher and ensuring her abs, hidden behind her bottom dow,n pressed against Maura's silk panties. She continued a slow, seductive body roll. She removed herself just enough and then pressed herself back into Maura to get her point across. Maura whimpered.

"Does he make you whimper like this Maura?" Jane said again. She removed her hand from Maura's neck, knowing Maura wouldn't move. She snaked it around and ran her fingertip across the top line of Maura's dress that held back her cleavage. As she did so she reached her tongue up and ran it across Maura's bottom lip.

Maura could feel herself getting wet. Jane slowly rolling her abs against Maura's clit, her finger running across the top of her sensitive breasts, and God her tongue. She was so taken back and so turned on that she moaned at Jane's possessiveness.

"Answer me, Maura" Jane demanded. Her voice was pure sex. Maura had to force herself to put words together.

"N n no" she stuttered out. The waves of arousal running through her were so intense she could barely keep her eyes open to look at Jane. She had never been this turned on before and they still had clothes on. This was better than the images she had come up with earlier. Jane hadn't even actually touched her yet. She wondered if she could cum just from Jane's teasing.

"Mmmm" Jane hummed as her tongue that had run along Maura's lip then traced Maura's jawline and up to her ear. Jane licked Maura's earlobe and then continued on, kissing and sucking on the skin behind Maura's ear. Maura's body rolled back against Jane, increasing the friction between their bodies, when Jane found the right spot.

"Oh God, Jane" Maura gasped. "Please" she begged, "Please let me feel you". In a moment of need, Maura reached down and grabbed at Jane's button-down, attempting to untuck it from her dress pants.

Jane's shifted Maura to her right arm and began to use her left hand to unbutton her shirt. Since she had changed at the precinct, she did not have an extra tank top to wear underneath. She wanted to give Maura this. She wanted to hear Maura beg.

Maura's eyes devoured Jane as she undid the last button. Jane had momentarily stopped her body's movements when she was undoing her shirt and Maura ran her nails down Jane's perfectly defined abs that flexed against her touch. Jane watched as Maura's eyes darkened at the view and her fingers running their claim against her exposed muscles.

Jane could tell Maura wanted to take over, to take control back, but this was hers. She wanted to leave Maura aching for her like she ached for Maura. She wanted to erase Jack from Maura's mind, from her body. She'd never felt so possessive in her entire life - so desperately in need to take. To claim.

Jane stared Maura straight in the eyes. When she felt Maura about to shift, to try to take over, Jane pressed her body into Maura again, this time more forcefully. Her abs rolled again and again against Maura's barely there panties. Maura's wetness had run through the silk and Jane could feel it spread across her bare abs. Maura hummed her approval of the added friction against her clit, caused by Jane's flexing abs. It was sinfully divine.

"I feel your wetness on me, Maura. Fuck I bet you taste so good." Jane husked again. "Tell me does he make you this wet?

"Oh God, Jane." Maura moaned again unable to control herself as she pressed back.

"I'll stop if you don't answer me, Maura." Jane threatened.

"No!" Maura nearly screamed. "No, Jane. Only you make me this wet."

Using the door for leverage Jane held onto Maura's ass with both her hands and continued to increase the pace of her rolls into Maura's core. Maura's wetness now glistening across Jane's abs along with some of the sweat Jane had begun to create. Jane's own arousal was getting the better of her as well. She wanted to make Maura hers and only hers. She had to keep herself at bay until that happened.

Maura couldn't take it anymore and grabbed Jane's face. She sucked on Jane's bottom lip and Jane moaned into her mouth. She took over Jane's mouth and their tongues battled back and forth for dominance.

"Jane" Maura panted. "Jane I need you. I can't take this much longer. I need you."

"Tell me your mine, Maura," Jane demanded as she tried to catch her breath.

Maura finally realized what this was about. Her brain had been so fogged by arousal and Jane surprising her that logic had never quite set in. Jane's possessiveness just increased her arousal. She felt a new wave of wetness run down her leg and spread across Jane's abs. The sound of Jane continuously sliding against her ruined panties was driving her crazy but she needed more. She needed to feel Jane inside her.

"I'm yours, Jane. Only yours." Maura moaned. "Please, Jane. Take me. Ruin me for anyone else."

That was all she needed to say. Jane pressed Maura tight against her, turn both of them around towards the office, and carried Maura to her own desk. She pushed the few folders out of the way and laid Maura on the smooth wood. Jane ran her hands over Maura's breasts and squeezed roughly so that Maura could feel her need to touch her through the fabric of her dress and bra. There was no time to undress. Maura arched her back as Jane continued to squeeze and mold her hands against Maura's boobs. Maura's nipples hard underneath the touch.

Jane continued downward, urgency getting the best of her until she got to the skirt bunched up high around Maura's thighs. She pushed it further up around Maura's waist to look at Maura's ruined panties. She licked her lips at the arousal that had run down Maura's thighs. It made Jane incredibly wet just to look at Maura this way. Without too much thought Jane ran Maura's panties down her legs and tossed it away. Maura was staring up at her, her eyes clouded in arousal. Her chest heaving.

She watched as Jane undid her own belt and pants, letting them drop with a thud around her ankles and boots. Maura was sure this was a sex dream coming true. Jane standing there with her button-down open, black bra, and black boxer briefs. Jane's eyes devouring her. Jane then tugged on her underwear and let them fall as well.

"I want to feel your pussy against my clit" Jane growled as she grabbed Maura's legs and thrust her pelvis forward. Both women moaned loudly at the contact. Jane began to pump herself against Maura's dripping wet center again and again and again.

"Oh God... Yes... Fuck, yes." Maura moaned out. Her swearing and clear need only sent Jane higher.

"You like that Maura? Is ...this... what... you... need? You... need... to... be... taken?" Jane spoke out between thrusts. Sweat now spread across her breasts, her abs, her legs.

"Jane" Maura moaned again.

"Tell me what you want Maura. I want... to hear you. I need... to hear you." Jane said again.

Maura's head was rolling back and forth. She could barely keep herself together. Jane was taking her in a way she'd never felt before. The way every woman wanted to be ravished. She felt sexy and needy and unbelievably wet. Oh god, she was so wet. Maura opened her eyes to look down her naked body. Seeing her juices all over Jane, feeling Jane's wetness mixing with hers was enough to make her cum. She knew what Jane needed, what Jane was asking her to say and she was more than happy to give it to her.

"I need you to fuck me, Jane." She said. "Oh God, fuck me right now." Maura panted.

After two more thrusts with her hips, Jane pressed two fingers inside Maura. She didn't slow, she didn't wait for Maura to be ready. She kept the pace and let the burn of her inside Maura indicate her own need to greedily take every inch of Maura.

Maura's body was more than needy of Jane. She was dripping wet, her clit swollen against the perfect abuse of Jane's pelvis slamming against it. Her vagina walls wrapped themselves around Jane inside her and hungrily pulsed around those perfect fingers. She arched her back in unadulterated need. She wasn't going to last long.

"Yes, Jane" she moaned. "Harder. Fuck me harder. Make me yours" Maura encouraged.

And she did. Jane held onto Maura's leg with her right arm pulling Maura back and forth. She continued to thrust her hips against her left hand, her fingers plunging deeply into Maura's wet pussy. Only after another minute, she began to feel Maura's walls flutter around her fingers. Jane's eyes rolled back into her head for a moment just at the feeling.

She looked down at the perfection a sex tousled Maura. Maura's dressed bunched around her. Maura's hands running over her own breasts totally in bliss of the moment. Jane loved watching herself fuck Maura. It was intoxicating, she was sure there was nothing sexier in the world than Maura Isles being taken. Jane curled her fingers ready to finish Maura off. Jane knew she too was close and had to concentrate to ensure Maura came first.

"Oh, Jane. Don't stop. Don't stop. Don't stop." Maura chanted. "Yes Yes Yes Yes"

"Come for me, Maura," Jane demanded.

Maura arched her back and Jane felt the intensity tighten around her fingers. She could barely move them back and forth as the waves of Maura's orgasm started. Jane felt Maura cum down so hard that wetness shot out onto Jane's pelvis, dripping down her neatly trimmed pubic hairs and nearly touching her own clit. Maura's body relaxed and she hummed her happiness as she caught her breath.

"Holy fuck Maura," Jane said dumbfounded. "You are so fucking hot."

Maura weakly pushed herself up onto her elbows on the desk to look at Jane. Her legs limp laying on either side of Jane.

"Oh God Jane." Maura panted, still trying to catch her breath as the after-waves of her orgasm still ran through her. "I've never done that before. I've never ejaculated. I've never felt... Oh God, I've never had that strong of an orgasm."

Jane was close. She was so close and she couldn't wait anymore. She kept eye contact with Maura and ran her fingers through Maura's juices that were running down her front. She collected it with her fingers and then used it to roll her fingers across her clit.

"Oh fuck Jane." Maura clearly turned on by her. She sat up wanting to participate, wanting to help Jane finish but not wanting to stop Jane from touching herself.

Maura kissed Jane's neck as Jane's fingers ran quick, tight circles around her own clit. "Jane you have no idea how hot it is to watch you touch yourself," Maura whispered.

That was all Jane needed. She leaned her head into the nook of Maura's neck and moaned Maura's name. White hot heat circled inside Jane's stomach as her orgasm ripped through her.

They sat there, in Maura's office, completely satisfied, saturated, and overwhelmed.

A knock on the door startled them and even though the door was locked, Maura found herself slightly hiding behind Jane's figure.

"Dr. Isles?" Korsak asked. "Jane? Are you guys in there?"

Jane spoke, knowing Maura couldn't lie, "Ya Korsak" She crocked, she cleared her voice. "We are in here. I have a gash on my side, I didn't want your old ass walking in with my shirt up." She joked. It was a lie, but one she knew would work.

"Oh oh, ya um well come up soon we need to get started," Korsak said nervously.

Maura stood up to press her dress down her body again, it was ruined with wrinkles and she wished she cared.

"Jane" Maura said as she looked up at her. "That was the single hottest thing that has ever happened to me."

Jane smirked back, "Oh really?"

"Yes Jane. It wasn't because well I've always wanted to be taken in my office." Maura blushed. "Or how absolutely fantastic you are at dirty talk"

"You bring it out in me" Jane quipped back.

"I loved it," Maura said lovingly. "And I can't wait to keep tapping into that. But Jane what made it the absolute more erotic experience was because it was you. Your hands. The husk of your voice. Your body on me."

Jane didn't say anything as she pulled up her underwear and pants. As she buckled her bet Maura pulled at Jane's opened button down and wait for Jane's eyes to meet hers. They were still sparkling but something else was starting to creep in.

"Jane I know we have to get going, just tell me whatever it is that's keeping you from enjoying this with me right now." Maura stated.

Jane lightly touched Maura's chin and graze her lips against Maura's. She left their lips still touching, the breath still shared as she said, "I can't share you. I can't even imagine the idea of someone thinking about you the way I do, let alone touching you the way I just did. Now that we've started this I can't slow it down."

Jane pulled back and continued as she buttoned up her shirt. "Maura it's your decision if you want me or you want him, but I can promise you no one will love you the way I love you. No one will want you the way I want you." Jane wanted to drive home her point, that Maura was her's. She wanted to ensure she had Maura's attention. "And this may go without saying, but that, what we did just did, was me controlling myself. Imagine what I could do to your body when we are constrained by office walls."

Maura's eyes fluttered. Jane's words clearly hit her exactly where Jane wanted to. "Jane" she panted.

Jane had finished buttoning her shirt and came over to kiss Maura deeply on the mouth.

"I'm yours, Jane" Maura said. "I'm all yours"

"Good. Let's make sure Jack gets that message. I can't promise I'll behave myself if I see his hands on you again" Jane stated. "I'm going to head up to the guys. See you soon?" she asked.

Maura just nodded. Her legs had still not gained enough strength to move much further than she was.

* * *

Jane walked up into the bullpen, grabbed her coffee, and said, "let's get to work boys"


	10. Chapter 10

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: The next few chapters may be shorter than the others (last week, for instance, was pretty lengthy!), but I want to make sure to give you an update. Thank you for following! Thank you for your reviews! Holidays are coming up which actually means I'll have time off... which I hope means... MORE WRITING. I am glad to hear you are still enjoying the story. Time for some detective work and story growth. The mystery continues...**

* * *

 _Jane walked up into the bullpen, grabbed her coffee, and said, "let's get to work boys"._

* * *

After two hours of reviewing and then doing it again, Jane was frustrated.

"Guys this isn't enough," Jane said. "We have to be missing something. I think we've been so focused on how it's connected to me, we've forgotten to go back to the beginning."

"That's true" Korsak nodded. They had let it get personal - they had focused on Jane and lost the original scent. "This guy only targeted Jane and Maura because you guys dug back into his original kills."

Jane stood in front of the murder board, focusing again on the far left which held the pictures of the original murders.

"Something connects these people. Did he threaten their families for revenge? For leverage? Does he enjoy the kill or was it just part of the overall mission?" Frost asked standing next to Jane.

"I think he enjoys it or at least enjoys the torment. He's not just threatening Maura to get to me, he's toying with me too. He's trying to make me feel vulnerable. Get under my skin." Jane stated factually. "I would have to imagine the same enjoyment was taken during these as well."

"Ok, so he enjoys it. That can at least help us try to get in his head." Korsak stated still staring at the board from his desk. "So did he do this, to these people, simply for enjoyment and what he thought he could get from them? Or were they people specific targets?"

"He knew them," Jane stated quickly with conviction.

"We have no proof, Jane. How can you be so sure?" Korsak said back.

"He knew too much detail about them. He studied them. He found their greatest weaknesses and exploited them. This was personal. It was very personal. And you don't do that for just a stranger." Jane said. It was clear that she was now in her head as he kept thinking silently chewing on the inside of her lip.

"It could be that he had to, Jane" Frost countered. Maybe yes these people were specific, but maybe they were not directly personal.

"What are you thinking Frost?" Jane questioned back.

"Ok roll with me here a second" Frost walked back to his desk, to his computer, and Jane followed. "Look at this Jane. None of these people could be leveraged with money. All of them had plenty. No crazy debt. A few with college loans or a car payment - but nothing out of the ordinary. No one in real debt. They save savings accounts. They are married or divorced. They are living normal lives. College. Career. Family. I mean shit a few of them give back to their schools."

"Mmmm" Jane said. Chewing on her lip again, clearly thinking. "Wait Frost" Jane's eyes were glued to the electric files he was toggling between.

Frost looked up at her as she lifted her head back up and stared at the murder board. "Wait. I think I just saw a connection. Where did each of the individuals who had been threatened go to college?"

Frost took a few minutes to search each of the individual's records, "Whoa Jane. Maybe that's it. They all graduated from BCU"

"Ok well that's at least something," Jane said.

"Uh Jane" Korsak said with his head tilted. "Doesn't Maura teach at BCU?"

Maura did teach at BCU. In fact, up until a few months ago Jane had hadn't missed a class. She had enjoyed auditing the class, simply sitting in the background and Maura thriving in her element. Jane responded while in thought. "You know she does Korsak" she said shortly. Irritated that she had missed that detail. "She also did her undergrad work at BCU".

"That could be another connection point Jane" Frost mentioned. "It's something we should keep on the table".

Jane shot her eyes back to her own desk to look at the date - days had blended together as they navigated this case. "Fuck" Jane exclaimed

"Language Jane" Maura had heard her as the elevator doors opened. It was purely reflex to say it, she blushed a little when she realized every detective had nearly broken their neck in surprise at her entrance.

Jane gave her a slightly mysterious look but otherwise ignored the comment as Maura walked in. Instead, she asked her another question, one she already had realized the answer to.

"Maura do you have class tonight?"

"Of course," Maura said back.

"And you didn't think to mention this?" Jane commented again.

"Why would I think to mention something you very well know is already the truth? That makes no sense Jane." Maura looked at her confused.

"Ya sure," Jane said still staring at Maura but not really looking at her. "Well cancel your class tonight. You aren't going"

"What do you mean cancel my class? I can't just cancel my class. And you, Jane Clementine Rizzoli, do not tell me what to do!" Maura remarked back sharply. She had squared her shoulders. Even with her 4-inch heels and chin now tilting upward authoritatively she still did not make eye contact with Jane.

Jane took one long stride into her Maura's personal space. She looked down and surprised even herself how close she had gotten. They nearly shared breath as Jean peered down at her. Jane was about to retort when Korsak interrupted with clearly this throat.

"Jane canceling her class isn't the right call here and you know. If we are on to something, we don't want to alarm anyone. Maura just out of the blue canceling class would absolutely spook him." Korsak said.

"I am not putting my.. my... my..." Jane realized too late what was she was about to say and recovered terribly, "doctor in unnecessary danger." She huffed trying to act tough, ignoring the rapidly growing warm on her cheeks.

"Your doctor?" Maura quirked. Her eyebrow up and her mouth fell into an amused smirk.

"Yes Maura" Jane said snarkily and sarcastically, "Our Medical Examiner. You are a doctor, aren't you?"

"mmmmm" Maura said back nodding. Making sure to leave Jane a little more uncomfortable for a just a little longer. She loved this small sliver of control over Jane. She did, however, realize she was cutting it close to making everyone else equally uncomfortable so she pivoted back to the task at hand.

"I must have missed something, Detectives. What does my teaching a class tonight have anything to do with me being in danger?" Maura asked.

While Korsak and Frost briefly filled Maura in, Jane paced in front of the murder board. They were on to something, but not enough pieces had come together yet. It left Jane on edge. Korsak's voice can back into Jane's awareness as they ended their conversation.

"Ok, so we are aligned. We will have two undercover officers among the students tonight. We will also have your normal detail follow you to and from campus." Korsak finished.

Jane watched Maura nod. She knew Korsak was right. Of course, he was right, they didn't want to show the cards yet. They had no idea what the dealer actually had in their hands yet. She could easily have nothing at all.

"I'm going with" Jane stated. It wasn't a suggestion and it wasn't a request.

"Jane that's really not necessary. You can stay here. It's fine." Maura commented back. There was no storm of emotions going through Jane. She was steady. Confident. And damn determined to be exactly where she said she would be.

"Maura I've been to your class before. I enjoy them. It will not be suspicious for me to be there." Jane watched as Maura was about to react she continued, "And before you try to once again politely say no to me, let me be clear that this is not a request. I'm going with."

Maura stared at Jane. This was Jane her hero, her best friend. Not worried Jane or new lover, Jane. This was also the Jane Maura rarely argued with and today, at least for this moment, would be no exception.

"Ok Jane," she said softly.

"Good." Jane looked at her watch. "We have a few hours before Maura normally gets to her class for prep. Let's look into different activities each of the people were in at BCU while attending and anything post-graduation. Maybe, like Maura, they took visit or help on the campus now.

While Frost went back to his computer and Korsak to review the paper files, Maura stood for a moment just to enjoy Jane. Jane who knew Maura's routine so well that she didn't plan on when Maura's class would start, but when Maura would want to be there to set up. Jane who was in her element.

"Maura?" Jane asked. Maura looked at Jane and by her facial expression assumed this wasn't the first time Jane had said her name.

"Yes, Jane?" she asked.

"You zoned out on me," Jane said with a soft smile.

"I'm sorry Jane. I was just thinking. What did you say?" Maura asked.

"I asked based on what we were just talking about and putting their student photos up from 20 years ago - do you recognize any of these people now?" Jane said.

When Maura's face still looked like it was forming a question mark above her head, Jane continued. "Maura, Frost is putting their student pictures up right now" Jane pointed to the board. "All of these individuals graduated around the same time as you did for your bachelors. I was just wondering if you happened to recognize any of them?"

Maura walked over and looked at their faces. She really did not recognize them. She knew that she did not know them, but she felt bad that she could not help in any way.

"No, Jane I'm sorry. I don't recognize them. I only took three years to complete my bachelors. Most of my honor classes from my boarding school allowed me to skip most of the classes people took freshman year. With that in mind, I didn't bond much with those of my age group. I also did as many internships as possible." Maura stated plainly still looking at their pictures.

For Jane, it pained her. Another reminder of how lonely Maura's life had been. Something to utterly foreign and confusing to Jane. She grew up with zero privacy, where Maura was given it to a suffocating level. Jane had never been able to quite wrap her mind around it. Maura was her absolute favorite person. Maura, in all her corkiness, was still easily the best person Jane had ever met. She was giving, compassionate, genuine. She would literally give you the coat off her back or buy you one of equal price which for most people would be worth one month's salary. Jane nearly smiled at the thought of that.

Without thinking, Maura spoke to try to be helpful and broke Jane from her thoughts.

"You know Jane, Jack works at the school as well. Do you think it would be helpful to see if he knows or remembers anything about this individuals?"

The look on Maura's face when she turned away from the murder board to face Jane showed, more than anything, that her mind had just caught up with her words. She was worried and shocked, but also interested in Jane's response. It was true, Jack really could potentially help.

Jane responded quickly, wanting to remove unneeded attention to Jack. "Thank you for suggesting that Maura. For right now, for his safety and the sensitivity to us having no idea where this is going, let's leave him out of this. If we realize we could potentially use another staff member's help I may revisit that with you."

Jane's response was professional, it lacked emotion which caused only alarm in Maura. Frost nodded and went back to typing. Korsak never even looked up. Maura, however, had only ever heard Jane respond that professionally when she wanted to make sure she, as Jane would say, 'didn't show her cards'.

She worried so she walked up to Jane and spoke quietly so no one else could hear. "Jane I'm sorry. It wasn't personal. I just sincerely want to help." She looked at Jane searching her eyes.

"Maur it's ok," Jane said. If she was rattled in any way, she didn't show it. "I understood your intention behind it. And my response was not personal either."

Jane could tell Maura didn't believe her. "Maura I promise. Had it been my actual, emotional response that happened internally I would have told you over my dead body." she joked and Maura smiled. "I believe, on a personal level, I've made it perfectly clear what I think about that man being anywhere near this body." As she said 'this' her eyes traveled down Maura fast enough to not be noticed by anyone else, but slow enough to make Maura's brain immediately think about being pinned against her office door and taken on top of her own desk.

"But on a professional level, we don't have enough to bring in outside parties just yet. Especially those who also have personal connections to it. Honestly, the investigation just doesn't have enough Maur." Jane stated factly. She looked into Maura's eyes to make sure Maura knew this was Detective Rizzoli answering and responding, not Jane.

* * *

A few hours later Jane was sitting at the far end of the second row. She liked being close enough to see all of Maura's features, but far enough away that she wasn't taking the seat of a student. She watched as Maura finished preparing for the class. A few students, mini Maura's in Jane's mind, had come in early. As she watched Maura writing things on the board and talking to herself as she prepared Jane continued to chew over the case.

The BCU connection was a good one. She had a gut feeling it played a role. What was bothering her was the secondary connection. How this person but knew these people from BCU, but also had the ability to know when she and Frost had checked out that evidence. She had had Frost run the background of every officer and detective at the department who graduated to BCU. There were several hits, but none of them created a reaction in her. Never the less Frost and Korsak were spending the evening checking into each.

Jane looked back up and made a mental note to tell Maura how gorgeous she looked. In fact, she couldn't wait. She didn't want to interrupt Maura's flow or disrupt the students who came and went from asking Maura questions so she decided to text. Why not be a little flirty?

J: I think I'm starting to understand the appeal of the teacher/student fantasy some people have... You are gorgeous

Jane smiled as she hit send. She watched as Maura finished answering a question and then looked down at her phone. She loved watching as Maura read the message and gave a cheeky smile. Clearly trying to hold herself back but unable to. Her phone buzzed.

M: Remind me to ask you to stay after class for some additional tutoring...

It was Jane's turn to smile at Maura's response. Ugh, she loved it. And she couldn't believe this was even possible. To flirt with Maura, knowing it leads somewhere. No more weird lines, well at least she hoped that's where they could get to. She staked her claim. She made sure Maura was more than aware of what she wanted. She wanted her. All of her. Always.

After a few more minutes Maura began her class and Jane began to zone out. It wasn't that she didn't care because she did. Maura was the best at her craft and teaching a forensic science class was perfect for her. It was just that Maura was sharing a case they worked together. She knew what they found, she knew the end result. She took the time to simply enjoy watching Maura. Watching her hands as they moved in parallel expression with her words or watching her arms as they extended towards the presentation pointing towards a specific piece of science. Maura voiced wonderfully drowned on and Jane used the time to chew through the facts again.

It was the change in Maura's voice that alert Jane to a problem. She looked at Maura whose face at first glance looked calm but her jaw was locked tightly and she was frantically grabbing the presentation clicker to move on. Jane then looked up and realized why. To the naive eye, it was just another dead woman, but Jane knew this case. This body was not part of it. Maura flipped through several pictures before she turned the projector off. Jane could tell Maura had no idea what to do. There was no way Maura would have mistakenly put in the wrong body and with her inability to lie Jane watched as Maura froze unable to pivot.

Jane stood, launching immediately into protector mode, and walked to the front. She spoke with authority as if on Maura's behalf as she got close.

"Sorry, class it looks like we are having some technical moment."

Jane stood close to Maura, their backs facing the class. "Maura it looks like there is only about 25 minutes left in the class. Let's just pivot, assign homework, and send them on their way."

Maura took a breath, nodded thankfully knowing that Jane just saved her, and turned around. She announced this week's homework and let the class go early.

As the student's filed out, Maura whispered so only Jane could hear, "That was a new body." They were standing next to each other, but facing out on the class in case students came down to ask Maura questions.

"I know it wasn't part of the investigation Maura. It's why it frazzled you, I get it." Jane said calmingly and quietly, honoring Maura's desire to not be heard.

"No, Jane," Maura said again. "That was a new body. I have a photographic memory, you know this. I've never seen that body before. It, at the very least, is not one we've worked on in the past five years."

This got Jane's attention. She began to turn to face Maura when the both heard a familiar voice.

"Maura, Maura" Jack called coming quickly down the stairs of the classroom from the hallway.

"I just heard there was some difficulty in your class. Is all ok?" Jack asked as he came down. He slowed his steps and nearly paused when he finally made note Jane was standing there at the front of the class with Maura.

"Wait, Jane what are you doing here? You know what, nevermind. I don't care." Jack said as he finished his descent. Jack reached for Maura's hips as he asked, "Maura is everything ok?"

Maura had nowhere to go. She had been standing in front of the table with Jane and now with Jack in her personal space, she felt trapped. She wasn't quite sure how to act until she felt Jane take a step away from her rather than towards her. Something then happened inside Maura, this innate need to protect her protector. To make it clear she meant what she to Jane.

In one switch motion, Maura simultaneously squared her shoulders and gracefully pushed Jack off of her hips.

"Yes, Jack I'm fine," Maura stated. When Jack went to reach back for her, she put up her hand. "Please stop Jack, you're making me uncomfortable."

Maura found herself irritated when Jack made a puppy dog face as if she wounded him.

"My concern is making you uncomfortable?" He snapped.

"The touching" Maura said. "The unnecessary touching is making me uncomfortable."

Jack dropped his hands but his eyes continued to question Maura. "Fine, Fine. Are you ok?" he asked again his concern beginning to sound less and less genuine.

"Yes. Again. I'm fine Jack." Maura stated.

"Jack thank you for your concern, honestly," Jane said, surprising both Jack and Maura a little when she spoke. "I hate to ask this of you, but I need to speak with Maura privately. Would you mind excusing us?"

Maura watched as Jane's face twitched. She could tell that it was taking every ounce of self-control for Jane to speak as kindly as she was. She bite the inside of her cheek to hold back a smile at the thought of what Jane most likely wanted to say. She was sure it was colorful.

"Why?" Jack asked. "So there is something wrong. What's going on?"

"Jack I'm sorry it doesn't concern you. There is nothing to worry about, I just really need to speak with Maura." Jane's tone began to get a little sharper. Her patience nearly about to crack at Jack's inability to take a fucking hint.

"What are you even doing here Jane? If this has something to do with the classroom, it's school business" Jack retorted.

"Jack, what's with all the questions? And what is making you so paranoid? There is nothing wrong. There is no big deal." Jane was irritated.

Maura finished for her, realizing Jane was more than likely seconds away from blowing up.

"Jack, Jane is here because I want her to be here. She comes to my classes quite often actually. Now, will you please excuse us, I would very much like to speak with her. And no, don't ask what it's about. It is, and I mean this as politely as humanly possible, none of your business."

Jack's demeanor changed to something Maura had never seen before. It made her uncomfortable. While outwardly he took a step back, smiled, and turned around to leave she felt something brewing beneath the surface. She subconsciously took a small side step towards Jane as if to seek comfort or a shield. Jack left without a word, but walked loudly up the stairs as if to throw an adult temper tantrum on his way out.

"That man cannot take a fucking hint," Jane said.

"Language Jane," Maura said back. She continued to look at the door Jack left even after he departed. She was tilting her head as if trying to recover a memory. "I will admit though, that was strange behavior even for Jack."

"Maur let's talk about this body. Where did those pictures come from?" Jane said eagerly wanting to get back on the matter at hand and more importantly, away from anything pertaining that weirdo who keeps touching Maura.

"I genuinely have no idea, Jane. I told you, I've never seen those pictures before. I have no idea how they were put in my presentation." Maura stated.

"Would you mind pulling them up on your laptop now that everyone has gone?" Jane asked.

Maura pulled up the presentation and they skipped to the pictures of a new body. An eery feeling ran across Jane's consciousness. This didn't sit well with her. Maura didn't put these here, which means someone did. Why? Who? How? Because she could begin to pose her questions outwardly to Maura their phones rang.

"Rizzoli"

"This is Dr. Isles"

"Oh wait, hold on Korsak. Where did you just say the body was?"

Jane reached over to Maura's computer and moved back to the first picture of the mystery body. Maura hung up her call and watched Jane intently.

"That wouldn't happen to be up near the pond would it?" Jane said. Maura watched her listen to Korsak's answer. "I see" Jane responded again. "Could you tell me what she's wearing?"

Jane listened again, this time chewing on her lip as Korsak spoke. "Ya ya, thanks. I'll explain when we get there. I'm with Maura now, her class just ended."

When Jane hung up she stared at the screen not yet looking at Maura.

"Jane, what's wrong?" Maura asking knowing something was bothering Jane and worried she already knew the answer.

"Maura the body Korsak just called us about is this body," Jane said still not making eye contact.

"I don't understand Jane," Maura said, clear evidence in her voice she was nervous.

Jane looked at her then and put Maura's shaking hands in her own. She ran her thumbs across Maura's knuckles. "I don't quite understand either Maura but from what I can gather the killer just put this clue in your presentation because someone called about finding the body." Jane paused. "He's still playing with and he's getting bolder."


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note: So sorry for the delay here! Just a snippet to keep you going, so unfair for you to wait. More coming tomorrow or Saturday latest I promise. Not much editing could really be done, but I hoep this helps! Thank you for reading, I love this community!**

* * *

As they pulled up to the scene together Jane squeezed Maura's hand. She knew the moment they stepped out of the car the team and the community needed them to be Detective Rizzoli and Dr. Isles. When Jane didn't get out of the car immediately Maura inquired about where her heard was at.

"Jane?" Maura asked, "We need to get out of the car. What's going on?"

"I just have a bad feeling about this one. My gut is telling me to be prepared here and I'm not sure why. I can sense this is off."

"Jane your intestates can't talk, we've discussed this at length," Maura said back with a hint of joking in her voice. She trusted Jane's 'feelings' on things, even though she could never actually understand how she got them. Her hope to make Jane laugh fell flat, though she did see a small smirk crack her lips.

"Maura when we walk out I know I have no authority to ask you of things, but I need you to trust me if I make any requests outside the norm." Jane stated. She looked at Maura who's eyes were questioning her and showed doubt that she could even humor this request. "I don't mean with the evidence. I'm not going to push you on blood or what have you, but I have a feeling this going to get personal. I need you to trust me."

"I do trust you," Maura said quietly. "All I can say is I'll try Jane. I have to be Dr. Isles out there."

"Ok Dr. Isles, it looks like they are calling us so we better go," Jane said. Maura squeezed Jane's hand one more time and then they both removed themselves from the car. Both, out of the corner of their eyes, watched the other transform into their professional self. Jane's confidence spiked up, she was the boss out there. Her swagger flowed as she seemed to raise two additional inches in an already giant personality. Maura on the other hand hardened. Her back straightened, it was her way of showing authority and class.

"What do we got?" Jane asked Korsak as she held the tape up for Maura's to duck under.

Frankie walked up, "No Maura is not going over there." He nearly shouted it across the way.

"Whoa hold on Frankie. We are at a crime scene. Show some respect here. This is Dr. Isles the Chief Medical Examiner. We need to speak accordingly." Jane shot back at him loudly. She then lowered her voice for fewer people to hear, "Frankie be careful how you address Maura in public. What's going on?"

"He left you messages, Janie." Frankie said.

"Thank you, Officer Rizzoli," Maura spoke professionally to Frankie. I, however, need to do my job. I assure you I am just as capable as Detective Rizzoli to be a professional."

"Sorry Dr. Isles," Frankie said. Clearly still unsure if Maura should go ahead but clearly outranked.

Maura whispered, "It's ok Frankie." Before she continued towards the body.

Maura approached the body of a middle-aged woman, blonde. She was exactly the woman in the pictures from Maura's class which, unfortunately, was not the most disturbing thing she found. When Maura stood over the body she saw the note rolled up in the woman's hand. 'Dearest Jane' was listed on the outside. She was impressed by the self-control it must have taken the team to wait and not remove it from the body until they got there. The most horrible part of the whole scene though was the obvious abuse this body took.

"Burn marks around the wrist indicate the victim was most likely bound," Maura said in her scientific tone. She watched as Jane crouched down and look at the woman. Maura bent down beside her and she said quietly, "There are obvious injuries to the inside of her legs as well Jane."

Jane took a deep breath, she was obviously very upset but trying to conceal it. "I'm going to remove the note now, does that work for you, Dr. Isles?" Jane said to Maura as professionally as possible. Maura simply nodded.

Jane slowly and carefully unrolled the letter to read it. She began to pace slowly away, thinking somehow she could have a moment to read it in private.

 _Dearest Jane,_

I should warn you, I'm tired of your games. I've laid this body at your feet on a bed of your lies. I've even dressed her the best I could for you. This is what you would call our kairotic moment Jane. I wonder, can you figure it out? I look forward to seeing you soon.

Sincerely,  
x.

"Jane, what is it?" Maura said now standing staring at the detective. Frost and Frankie had now joined her as well.

Jane handed Frost the letter but kept her eyes on Maura.

"He said he dressed her for me," Jane spoke to Maura. Maura looked at Jane for only a moment with some alarm before understanding that Jane wanted Maura to look at the body with her.

"These clothes don't look familiar to me," Jane said. "I've never seen this shirt before and while the pencil skirt makes sense, it's my favorite on you, it looks to be of cheaper material. I can't see you ever wearing it." Jane said. Maura blushed slightly at the comments even though she tried to fight it. This was not the time or place, but the way Jane just so casually commented on what she liked seeing Maura wear and even so far as to understand what materials Maura wouldn't put on… it did something to Maura libido.

"I'm right aren't I," Jane said to Maura with a smirk. Their eyes met and Maura's blush increased.

Maura cleared her throat, "Yes you are right. Neither this shirt nor skirt is mine or anything like mine."

Jane surveyed the body back and forth not understanding. She knew for a fact 'X' as he called himself wrote this for a reason. He wanted Jane to find whatever the clue was, but the clothing didn't make sense.

"The shoes are also far too ugly" Maura stated. Jane snickered.

"I don't get it though Maura, he said he dressed her the best he could for me," Jane commented still in thought.

"I'm not sure Jane," Maura stated.

"Jane" Frost commented behind them. Both Jane and Maura looked back to greet his voice.

"This letter also says he laid the body on your bed of lies," Frost commented. "What the hell does that mean?"

"Jesus Frost I don't know," Jane said annoyed.

Maura looked down at the body and noticed the corner of something poking out. She pulled at it and it and realized it was a picture. The picture was a profile of Maura from the shoulder up talking to someone. Her eyes were twinkling and her smile bright. Despite the low pixelation she, herself, had to admit she looked rather beautiful.

"Jane this was under the body," Maura stated. "It's a picture of me from the gala last year."

Jane took the picture from Maura and stood. She took a deep breath and then handed the picture to Frost for him and Frankie to also review. Jane began to pace which immediately signaled to Maura she was in distress. It was something Jane did when she was frustrated, though most people assumed she was simply thinking.

"Wait so this guy has been stalking Maura since last year?" Frankie huffed.

"That doesn't make sense Frankie," Frost commented, "We only checked the evidence out weeks ago."

"Ya but he's obviously stalking her to get this shot," Frankie said.

"That's fair" Frost commented back again.

Jane gave out a deep sigh, loud enough that Maura, Frost, and Frankie looked at her.

"What is it, Jane?" Maura asked.

"He didn't take the picture," Jane mumbled.

"What?" Frost asked.

"He didn't take this picture. I did." Jane said with a sound of defeat in her voice. "This is from my phone."

"I'll explain later. Right now, Maura, can you have your team move the body?" Jane asked.

Maura nodded, clearly wanting to ask more questions but refraining. A few moments later her team was living the body and to Jane's dismay, her gut feeling that she was going to feel embarrassed and humiliated came true. Under the body were well over 30 different pictures and just from her view standing above them alone, she knew they were all on her phone.

Jane's jaw locked as Maura bent down and began looking at the photos. She couldn't look down without getting even angrier so she looked out past the crowd of cops behind them. She felt violated yet again. She knew that was the point, to continue to make her vulnerable, to make her feel less. She tried to sort herself but she couldn't. She felt herself wanting to cry or yell so she decided to excuse herself.

"Can um.." Jane's voice cracked so she cleared her throat and tried again. "Can you guys collect these as discretely as possible and meet me back at the station?"

Frost and Frankie nodded, Jane made no attempt to look at Maura.

"Thanks, I um… I need a minute." Jane said as calmly as she could. Jane began to walk away taking her gloves while she did.

Maura stood up and looked at Frost who nodded. A silent agreement passed between them and then Maura, as quick as she could in heels and shorter legs hurried to catch Jane before she got to the car.

"Jane" Maura said but Jane didn't stop. "Jane!" she shouted a bit louder. This time Jane heard her and stopped but didn't turn around. When Maura got close she didn't know exactly what to say so she remained simple, "You drove me here."

"Oh," Jane said.

They got in the car together and Maura watched Jane's face as she drove. She was grinding her teeth and trying not to make an expression. When they got to the parking garage Jane parked the car but didn't say anything. She just stared forward.

"Jane," Maura said softly. She understood Jane felt embarrassed and she wanted to minimize the blow. "It's ok. Let's just talk it out."

"Maura I'm just…." Jane couldn't continue.

"Feeling exposed?" Maura said softly again.

Jane turned to look at her. "Well Yes," Jane said and then paused. "Wait, you aren't upset with me?"

"Jane why would I be upset with you?" Maura asked.

"Well, the pictures of you," Jane commented as if she made sense.

"Mad is the wrong emotion. I'm…. Well, I'm intrigued by why you have them, but honestly Jane I supposed I'm also flattered." Maura stated back.

Jane blushed harder still. "They are just moments where I don't know. I was taken back by you and I didn't want to lose them. I never showed them to anyone and never expected to share them. I'm not sure why he called them lies, but I do feel weirdly vulnerable. Like my diary was read or something."

"Well, that's very of you to say, Jane. I am sincerely flattered." Maura said. Jane finally looked at her and saw nothing but exactly what Maura said sincerity.

"I'm sorry I had those pictures of you Maura, I guess I should have thought to ask you," Jane said still wildly embarrassed.

"Jane in full disclosure I have pictures of you on my phone that I'm sure you don't know about. It's just what happens when two people feel about each other the way we do." Maura said.

Jane couldn't help herself she reached over the armrest and pulled Maura in for a soft kiss. She leaned her forehead against Maura's for a second before pulling back completely.

"Jane" Maura said again.

"Hmmm," Jane said as she looked over at her.

"What do you think he meant by lies?" Maura asked softly but bluntly.

"I have to say, Maura, I honestly don't know. Maybe it's in reference to my feelings - realizing how long I've probably felt the way I feel about you and didn't say anything. Though I myself didn't understand that until more recently." Jane shrugged. She too was a little unsure what he was looking for from her.

Maura nodded and then said, "We should probably get in there."

* * *

Jane waited at her desk for Korsak and Frost. She was deep in thought trying to consider the different weird questions of this new body when her phone rang.

"Rizzoli"

"Jane the body just arrived. Do you want to be here for the autopsy?" Maura asked.

"Ya I really do, thanks, Maura. I"ll be down in a minute." Jane commented. She hung up and then called Frost.

"Hey Jane, we are almost there," Frost said.

"Have Korsak and yourself meet me in the morgue. The body just came in I want to review it once more and review the pictures." Jane said.

"Ugh ok," Frost said, always unhappy to have to be down there when

* * *

When Jane walked into the morgue Maura had changed into her black scrubs and pulled her hair into a soft ponytail. She was washing her hands and looked up with a smile at Jane.

"Hey you" Jane said.

"Hello Jane" Maura said sweetly.

"Frost and Korsak should be down here any minute. Do you mind if we use the other table to spread out the photos from the crime scene? I kind of want to do parallel processing here. I also would feel more comfortable if you looked at the pictures too. I know it's weird, they are of you, but maybe you'll remember something from one of the events in question." Jane said with her detective tone but looked down as she finished her sentence.

Maura smiled. Despite all the weirdness of this case and the nervousness she often felt, she also very much enjoyed being wanted. Being part of the team and most importantly, being Jane's partner.

"Of course Jane, I want to help. Thank you for letting me."

Jane was able to say something back when Korsak came booming through the door. "I swear to god this sick fuck is going to be the end of my patience." He tossed the bag of photos onto the empty table, clearly understanding without directive what Jane had hoped to achieve. From followed behind him with his computer.

"Jane, can I have your phone?" Frost asked.

"Ya sure, why?" Jane asked as she unclipped it from her utility belt.

"You said these are from your phone or I made that up and assumed so. Either way, I'm pretty sure that's right and I want to see if I can tell when it was tampered with." Frost commented already kind of in his own world as he opened her phone.

"Ok, whatever you got to do," Jane said.

"Uh, Jane," Frost said. She looked at him. "Is there anything private on her you don't want me to see?"

"You're joking right?" Jane commented. She pointed to the table where Korsak was carefully laying out the pictures, "Those were the private pictures I wouldn't want anyone to see."

Frost looked semi-embarrassed and began plugging Jane's phone into his laptop.

"Wait, Jane" Maura commented. "Bare with me here and don't feel embarrassed. Why wouldn't you want anyone to see these pictures of me? Why would these be your private photos?"

Jane looked at Maura like she was about to get upset.

"I'm trying to see if we can understand something the killer figure out, humor me, Jane," Maura said again softly.

Jane rubbed the back of her neck with her left hand. "Well, I guess because at least a few of these pictures are pictures I have looked at a lot. I've gone back to them time and time again. When I missed you or when I woke up from a nightmare or something. They are kind of my private safe haven I guess. Maybe that's why I feel so exposed."

"Jane I'm going to need your help to understand a timeline here. There are 34 pictures here in total." Korsak stated. "I counted twice to be sure."

"Why 34?" Frost asked while he worked on the computer.

"Beats the hell out of me" Jane said.

"It's how old Jane was when she met me" Maura commented.

"Wait what?" Jane said.

"Jane it's how old you were when we met. And look this photo right here, I remember you taking it but it's from one of the first outings we did when we had gotten close. It's at my first Sox game." Maura stated. "He must have assumed because I was looking away it was a picture you never told me about, but you did. You showed it to me. You said it was proof I was a real fan now."

"That's the picture..oooof" Frost started and then got a swift kick from Jane.

"I'm sorry what?" Maura asked.

"Jane there are no secrets now, Frost what were you going to say?" Korsak asked.

"That is the picture Jane keeps in her wallet, I would have recognized it anywhere," Frost said.

"That's your picture?" Korsak asked her.

Jane rolled her eyes. "Yes, fine, it is. No big deal."

"It is a big deal, Jane. I'm so happy if you and Maura have finally figured out the chemistry between the two of you we've all seen for years. But maybe this is part of it. How long have you carried that photo?" Korsak asked.

"Wait I'm so sorry to interrupt here. I'm confused. What are you talking about with this picture and carrying it?" Maura asked.

Frost spoke then as Jane glared at him. "Beat cops normally have a picture on their visor of their patrol car. It's our way of reminding us who we are out there for. It also reminds us to stay smart, to make it back in the car at the end of each call. It's the person you want to get back home to. Does that make sense?"

Maura nodded.

Frost continued, "Obviously when you make detective you begin trying an unmarked and the job is different. The beat cop habit stays with you though. Every single one of us carries a photo in our wallet. It's a known thing among us. If something happened to us, that's where we would look."

Maura looked unconvinced.

"Here I can prove it," Frost said. Korsak can you take Jane's wallet and immediately go where she would hide that picture. Say it out loud first before you do it so Maura knows where you are looking."

Korsak outreached his hand and Jane, as a less than willing party, huffed as she handed over the wallet. Before Korsak opened it he said, "The picture will be folded behind Jane's insurance card, wherever she has that in her wallet."

Maura stepped over to stand next to Korsak as he opened Jane's wallet. They both noticed the insurance card at the same time and Maura surprised Korsak when she reached for the card herself. She pulled out the insurance card and immediately saw something else folded behind it. She pulled it out and sure enough, it was the picture of Maura from their Sox game. The same picture at the center of their discussion. Maura's eyes filled with intensity and affection.

"Jane, how long have you been carrying this?" Maura asked.

"Oh, it doesn't matter Maura," Jane said.

"It does matter Jane," Korsak interjected. "This could play into this guy's whole state of mind. How long have you been carrying that as your picture?"

"Since Hoyt came back. I um. I had to remind myself to keep going. I had to remind myself why it mattered that I kept fighting. Maura reminded me of the good in my life, the good that I could still be a part of. That smile..." Jane grabbed her wallet and the picture back as if it was worth millions of dollars, delicately and possessively "... there on her face. I did that."

Frost nodded as if to agree with her. And watch as Maura looked at Jane lovingly.

"What was it before this picture?" Maura asked, a little surprised at herself that it came out of her mouth.

"Ma and me at graduation," Jane said. "That was my beat picture too"

Both Korsak and Maura allowed that to sink in. Jane never had a romantic picture until Maura. It was her mother, which made sense. The only other person Jane did just about anything for. Something of pride swelled through Maura. She felt invincible. For Korsak, he felt proud of Jane for finally exposing her feelings to Maura, as there was no doubt in his mind she had with how easily Jane was telling Maura all these things. He also felt upset with himself, for not knowing Jane had changed out her picture years ago.

"Anyway, none of this matters. There is no way he could have known that." Jane said.

"Yes, there is Jane," Maura stated again. "You were recently in the hospital. Your clothing was removed for you and while it was handed to me closely after, it still exchanged hands. If he knew where to look he could have seen it."

"Which makes me think, once again, there is someone on the inside of these walls" Jane pointed around the building "that is either doing this or helping this sicko out."

"Ok so let's assume it's true. Let's assume he saw it. And let's assume he purposely made sure it was 34 pictures to match the age when Jane met Maura. What else do we know?" Korsak asked.

"Nothing Korsak" Jane said as she looked at the pictures again and again. "They are just memories. My moments once again stolen by someone they don't belong to."

Maura turned away to put on gloves and start working on the body when she heard Jane, "hey wait I didn't take this photo."

They all came in closer. It was a photo of Maura sitting at Jane's side in the hospital. She had tears rolling down her cheeks, she was staring at Jane's closed eyes and holding her hand. This was very clearly a woman in love. A woman very scared and very much in love.

Maura broke the tension, "So he was at the hospital. The clothes I'm wearing, you wouldn't have been awake yet. I didn't change until you were."

It was a sobering moment. "So he wants me to know he can get to me. He's said it more than once." Jane said, clearly needing a break.

"I'm a little worried about this body Maura. Can we start? My senses have been on edge since we got to the crime scene earlier." Jane commented

"Of course," Maura said and got to work. She knew Jane needed a minute and she was happy to finally get started.


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's note - Another update here you go! More to come, I promise this story isn't done yet. We still have some more investigating to do! Thank you for sticking with the story and being such awesome readers. I've enjoyed this journey with you, please keep letting me know if you want the story to continue and I promise I'll keep writing.**

* * *

 _"I'm a little worried about this body Maura. Can we start? My senses have been on edge since we got to the crime scene earlier." Jane commented_

 _"Of course," Maura said and got to work. She knew Jane needed a minute and she was happy to finally get started._

Maura started her autopsy like she does every autopsy. Reviewing the body from the outside. Taking great care to look at the clothing, fingernails, and outside wounds. Her meticulous scrutiny to detail and way of always reviewing the body from head to toe was something Jane always took comfort in. Jane always thought that it was potentially strange that she found comfort in this routine, but when you spend most of your relationship surrounded by cases you tend to find comfort in very strange things.

"Jane before I undress her I think you should take your own thorough look through," Maura stated.

Both Korsak and Jane moved forward. Frost staying back working on the computer and thankful to not get any closer. Korsak and Jane were old pros at this. There was nothing strange about this request, in fact, Jane almost always wanted to be down with Maura when she did an autopsy. She wanted the clues Maura found as quickly as she found them. Waiting for a report always felt way too long for Jane.

The unfortunate reality was nothing stuck out to Jane. She reviewed the woman's clothing again. Her hair, her face. Nothing felt like she should know her. While she was blonde and slender like Maura, she otherwise didn't remind Jane of her. She didn't understand the point of this kill. This guy was killing with purpose so why her? Why this message?

"Ok I think I've come up with a theory" Korsak stated. "It feels a little far-fetched, but it's all I can think of right now." He looked at Jane as if to say don't shoot me down until you hear me out.

"Well, out with it Korsak. I've clearly got nothing" Jane said

"Jane I mean... just don't get mad," Korsak said with a warning tone.

Jane gave him a cross look and then attempted to soften her body language, "Ok. What?"

"What about her undergarments?" He put his hand up when he saw Jane's body stiffen and Maura start to flush. "Don't get embarrassed or upset - look this isn't easy to ask. But what about what she's wearing under her clothes. Could that be what he means? He's obviously playing off of your romantic feelings for Maura, could that possibly be it?"

Jane stared at the body for a while. From her face down to her toes and back. She was thinking. Neither Korsak nor Maura moved, they just watched. Something was happening in Jane's mind. They knew her process.

"While I have preferences." Jane's face blushed as she tried to get the words out, "of undergarments as you call them. That isn't something Maura would exactly know." Jane stole a glance at Maura who had shot up a playful eyebrow and was clearly intrigued. "It's also something I would never have shared out loud with Derek nor written down. But your question got me thinking Korsak. Not about her lacey stuff, but about her jewelry. She has on earrings, a necklace, and two bracelets. Don't get me wrong, I don't wear jewelry - it's not my thing. But I know when things don't match and these..." Jane stepped closer and motioned up and down to the different pieces "Don't go together. And they feel out of place with her outfit."

Everyone looked at the jewelry taking in Jane's assessment.

"Maur, what do you think?" Jane asked realizing she was the expert on the beautifying of women in the room.

"Jane you are absolutely right. These pieces don't really go together and her jewelry is far more sophisticated than her outfit." Maura said.

"What do you mean more sophisticated?" Korsak asked.

"I believe what she means to say is that this is how he dressed her up for me," Jane commented. "I don't think these are hers. Though, as weird as this might sound, I feel like I've seen that bracelet before."

"You have," Maura said, her voice meeker than normal. The tone surprised Jane and she met worried hazel eyes. "Jane I think this is mine."

"What do you mean you think this is yours?!" Jane responded.

"Well, I obviously cannot be certain without checking my home. But to be honest, all of these pieces are similar to some I own. What's interesting is that most of these are pieces I wear more casually." Maura stated back.

At this point, Frost had gotten up and was looking at pictures. He began picking up four or five of them with what looked like purpose. "Jane take these pictures and compare them. Maura is wearing jewelry in these."

"Maura is always wearing jewelry, Frost. The only time she doesn't is yoga and running." Jane said. Again her detail around Maura's habits made Maura smile lightly, even despite the creepy circumstances of someone potentially taking her things.

"Yes, but most of the pictures Maura is wearing very expensive jewelry - diamonds, emeralds - you know the good stuff. These few, specific pictures are all of Maura dressed down. Or what Maura calls dressed down." Frost handed them to Jane.

Sure enough. Frost was right about four the pictures. They matched the jewelry on the body.

Something expected but unexpected happened then. Maura couldn't really explain it. While the action surprised her, at the same time did not surprise her at all. She watched as fear washed over Jane's face but was quickly replaced with anger and then escalated to rage. With Jane yet speaking Maura could tell the woman was about to explode.

"I swear to fucking god if this piece of shit stepped foot in her house," Jane said as she threw the pictures back at Frost. "Has there or has there not been a fucking unit sitting outside her house at all times?" Jane's tone was accusing and harsh.

"There has" Korsak responded. He knew this was the scariest Jane of all - protective Jane. And not just protective of her family - her mother or brothers. No, this was a Jane they didn't see often but when they saw her you did not fuck with her. This was 'protective of Maura' Jane - the absolute fiercest version that came up from Jane. To be completely honest, Korsak was glad to finally see her. At times during this whole horrible fiasco, he saw more Jane than Detective Rizzoli. She was the victim over and over again - and rightfully so. But there was only one Detective Rizzoli - the youngest and most decorated detective Boston PD had seen. She was the only person who was going to catch this son of a bitch before something happened to Maura. And she was the person Korsak had been waiting to show up. Pissed off, don't touch the person I love the most, Detective Rizzoli. She had... arrived.

"Well let's see if they were actually doing their fucking job. Frost keep working on this phone thing and for now, if you don't mind, don't leave Maura's side." She looked at Frost who simply nodded as he continued to work.

"An acknowledgment would be great here Frost, I really don't want mixed signals because I swear to god if I come back and a single hair on that beautiful head is out of sorts I'll have your balls." Frost looked up to realize what Korsak had noticed a few moments before. Jane was blazing anger and had just gone into the deep end. He knew better than to push back at her, though he was a little pissed she assumed he had to be asked to have Maura's back.

"Of course Jane," Frost said. He kept a straight face knowing it just wasn't the time or place.

"Jane you don't have to be..." Maura was cut off by Korsak's hand on her shoulder.

He softly whispered in her ear, "Let her go.."

"I don't have to what?" Jane said sharply but her eyes showed she had wished she didn't. She had originally told her not to be so rude. Maura took a breath knowing she couldn't lie but trying not to stir the pot Korsak just warned her not to stir.

"You don't have to worry about me," she said. She made the right call. Jane's posture softened if only slightly.

"Maura, of course, I have to worry about you" She simply pointed to the body on the table. "Please just be careful, ok? While I'm gone just stay here, with Frost. I won't be ale to focus if I think you are out there at risk." Jane commented. She watched Maura nod and then turned to leave. As she was exiting the door she yelled, "Come on Korsak I don't have time to wait for your old ass"

Korsak turned to Maura who had worried eyes. "You focus on this, I'll focus on her. We need Detective Rizzoli right now Maura. This is getting more serious by the minute. He's escalated and if we come to find this is your jewelry, well we need to start thinking about moving you to a safe house."

Maura's eyes flashed fear and Frost noticed it from across the room.

"One step at a time Dr. Isles. You focus on the body and I'll focus on the phone while they are gone. Ok?" Frost said.

"I can do that," Maura said. She rolled her shoulders, cracked her neck, and got back to work.

As Korsak passed Frost he leaned in and whispered, "I've got a bad feeling about this. Worse than before."

Frost softly nodded, "me too"

* * *

Jane and Korsak stood in Maura's driveway as they prepared to walk inside. Jane had demanded that the unit wait for her to arrive. She wanted to see things as Maura had left them that morning and she wanted to look for any small minuscule changes that someone could have made if they actually came into Maura's house. Jane's intention was to put Maura on facetime once in her closet where Maura keeps all of her jewelry.

Entering the house Jane inhaled, the immediate smell of home to her - Maura. The faint smell of perfume and coffee still lingered. Jane hated that this space had been invaded, her sacred place. Even before heading to Maura's room, in fact, the entire drive over Jane had prepared herself. She was quite sure they would be finding out that was Maura's jewelry. She just... she felt it.

As they climbed the stairs, Jane in front of Korsak, Korsak spoke. "You think we are going to find that it is her jewelry don't you."

"Ya, I do," Jane said in a slightly defeated tone.

"Then why didn't he take more fancy things like you mentioned before?" Korsak asked.

"I've been wondering the same, running a few scenarios in my head but I think it's the obvious one. Maura has a safe in her closet, for her more expensive jewelry. My guess is he would have taken the more expensive jewelry if he could have broken into the safe." Jane stated.

"So he grabbed what he could," Korsak spoke it out loud but clearly was still thinking through what Jane said.

"That's my theory right now, but let's see what we find," Jane said as she stood in the doorway of Maura's bedroom.

They walked in slowly. As Korsak walked around the room looking, but not touching it finally occurred to Jane this was, of course, the first time Korsak had been upstairs in Maura's house - he wouldn't have had a reason to come up here. And of course, Korsak was a gentleman. He would have never sought up Maura's bedroom and invaded her privacy. She enjoyed, for a moment, watching him look around. Trying to see this room through a new set of eyes. For Jane, this was her favorite room in the entire house. It was the absolute most Maura. It was simple even with its large space and beautiful high ceiling. Maura had a few frames on her large vanity - one of her as a child with her mother, another with the Rizzoli clan, and one of the homicide team after winning their softball tournament a year back. Jane smiled at them, the pictures Maura looked at every day when she was putting on her finishing touches.

Maura did everything with a purpose, Jane knew that. Which led her back to watching Korsak who was now standing on Maura's side of the bed looking down at her bedstand. On the bedstand were a silver lamp, clock, and a single frame. In the frame was a picture of Maura and Jane - Jane standing behind Maura with her arms wrapped around her front both of them lost in their own moment neither looking at the camera. It had been a moment Frost had caught one evening when everyone was standing around in the backyard. The opposite bedstand, that had been deemed Jane's side without either of them talking about it, had Jane's favorite picture of them framed - the same picture on her own dresser.

Korsak looked back at Jane who was still somewhat in the doorway with a soft smile. He picked up the frame and with that same hand gestured over to the other picture of them framed. "And you had no idea she was in love with you. For a detective, you are pretty dense sometimes." He laughed and Jane shrugged with a laugh as well.

"I'm serious Jane. Look at this, a subtle testament to who means the most to her." He said it like a father figure, not a fellow detective.

"I mean sure Korsak, in retrospect, but she was dating other people. More specifically once I got my own head out of my ass, she was with Jack. Frames aside, that's a pretty clear indication she was focused elsewhere. At least I thought so." Jane.

"God, that poor man. I can't imagine trying to get busy with your face staring at me." Korsak said.

Jane hadn't really ever thought of that. Maybe that played a part in the fact Jack always didn't like her. She spoke before she had fully thought it through, "He never did like me much"

"Of course he didn't Jane. You snarled at him whenever he even touched Maura." Korsak laughed. Jane smiled.

"Oh oops," Jane said partially laughing. "Anyway, let's take a look at this closet."

Jane walked to the walk-in closet, next to the bathroom on the right side of the room. She clicked the light on and they enter the mini-room.

"This is bigger than my main bathroom," Korsak said in awe as he viewed the back wall that was top to bottom full of shoes.

"You haven't seen her master bath. It's bigger than my bedroom." Jane deadpanned which got a hearty laugh out of Korsak.

"Ok, so there's the safe." Jane pointed to the right wall of the closet where the safe was subtly set into the wall amongst the shelves of accessories. Jane pulled out a drawer right beneath the safe where she knew Maura kept her less expensive items. Jane proped her phone up on a shelf and started a facetime call to Maura.

When Maura's face appeared on the screen, clearly still working on the body in the lab, Jane watched Maura's eyes light up when the call connected.

"Jane!" Maura said. Relief laced her voice.

"Hey Maur" Jane commented back. She took a moment to run her eyes of Maura's features - her eyes, her adorable hair back in a ponytail, her lips. When she refocused and looked back Maura, Maura had been watching her and was softly smiling.

"I miss you too" Maura said as if to respond to Jane's watchful eyes.

Korsak cleared her voice.

"Oh hello to you too Detective Korsak," Maura said showing she was unbothered by him hearing her moments to Jane.

"Ok Maur, I'm looking at the drawer where you keep some of these items. Any specific places or boxes in here I should be looking at?" she said.

"The necklace would be in the long silver box towards the front, left of drawer," Maura said. "You draw a baseball on the box when it was sitting down on the counter when I first bought it." Jane smiled at the memory and immediately identified the box. When Jane opened it she dropped her head. She had been right. The necklace as missing - or I supposed not missing at all. It was in the lab, currently, with Maura.

Maura's face showed discomfort like she was trying to be calm but she was clearly upset and was dealy with the internal struggle of it.

"So they are mine," Maura said as a matter of factly in her tone as possible.

"It looks to be the case," Jane commented back.

Just to be sure Jane looked through the other boxes to confirm, with Maura's directive, to find that each item that was removed from the body in Maura's lab matched the items they feared were missing from Maura's home. Their fears were confirmed one by one. While Jane was finishing that and trying to keep a neutral tone for Maura's sake Korsak had been staring just above her head at the safe.

"I had been wondering why he didn't try to get into the safe, but this looks like something he would have been unable to crack" Korsak stated.

From her view on the phone, Maura looked at him and responded. "That's correct Korsak. It's a double entry safe - meaning you, as I'm sure you know, there are two steps. First, there is a thumbprint entrance, once that is confirmed, you have to have the 8 digit code that changes monthly"

"Jesus that's pretty secure for a home safe. What do you have in there Maura a million dollars?" Korsak questioned slightly jokingly. Maura missed the humorous notion of his question so her natural instinct was to simply answer her colleague.

"I can't be 100% precise detective as I have not recently had it evaluated but at the last appraisal, there was 4.8 million dollars worth of jewelry and diamonds in the vault," Maura stated simply as if it the dollar amount didn't matter as much as the fact she could not give Korsak the perfect evaluation.

"I see," Korsak said, trying to keep a straight face for Maura, not wanting her to know he was sure he'd never seen that dollar amount of jewelry in one place before."Well sounds smart to keep your valuables secure. Does anyone else have access to the vault?"

"Jane" Maura stated, Jane felt her eyes get red knowing Korsak was looking at her head. "Her thumbprint and mine were both registered as main users. I inform her the code change verbally every month."

"Which is slightly irrelevant, since he clearly took jewelry not in her safe" Jane said, defensive that Korsak was butting into Maura's personal decisions.

"Jane, I'm not trying to dig in here to be nosey. I just want to keep following any line of questioning that pops up. Ok? Like I would for anyone else." Korsak stated trying to calm the storm before it started.

"It's quite alright Korsak. I'm happy to answer whatever you need" Maura answered from the phone. "To be honest I'm finding myself a bit spooked someone was in my home and dressed my things onto this poor woman."

Her admission snapped Jane back to reality. "Gosh Maur I'm so sorry. We failed you here. We should have someone watching the house more carefully. I will make sure to find out what happened."

Maura smiled as softly as she could, putting aside her own fears to try to calm her overprotective best friend, "I know you will, Jane".

Korsak stepped up to stand with Jane at the still open drawer. "This drawer looks very organized, down to a science."

Maura smiled as if it was the best compliment she'd heard all day. "Yes, of course" she answered.

"Over the past couple days have you come home feeling it was out of sorts?" Korsak asked.

Maura looked like she was thinking. "I haven't used anything in that drawer in about two weeks. At the time I opened it, no, it was not out of sorts. I also opened it to wear th necklace that is now, well here, with me." Maura looked down. While Korsak and Jane couldn't see, it could be assumed she was glancing at the victim or the necklace itself.

"That's really helpful Maur. That gives us a timeline. The necklace was taken in the last two weeks." Jane said.

"12 days" Maura commented back. "It was 12 days ago"

Jane nodded at Maura's help to be even more specific.

"It tells us something else too" Korsak commented. "Maura is an organized person. Look at her closet and this was on a day she didn't expect guests. She had no idea we'd be here."

"Ya so?" Jane commented, knowing full well this is how Maura's closet always looked.

"Well, think about it, Jane. This person either took his time, not caring if he was caught. Or knew exactly what he was looking for." Korsak said. "To not know what you were looking for and to be worried about time would mean more chaos. Or at least enough for Maura to notice. But there was none. I would assume someone who doesn't know Maura as well, wouldn't know necessarily that her more expensive pieces were locked up. And if they didn't, meaning they had to pivot their approach, they then had time to look around. It's one or the other Jane."

"So either they have an intimate knowledge of Maura or they have an intimate knowledge of how we are watching the house" Jane commented.

"Yes," Korsak said. "Well, I guess we could also suppose both - that they know Maura and the department's processes. One does not exclude the other."

"The deeper we get into this thing, the more I dislike it," Jane said.

"I think that's the whole point" Korsak shot back with a sympathetic expression on his face.

Jane looked up to see Maura still watching her from the screen of her phone. "Maura, can you grab Frost?" Jane said

"I'm here Jane, I was listening in the background" Frost commented.

"Oh, ok good" Jane said, remembering she threatened his life only a little while ago if he moved. "Frost, focus on the last 12 days with the intrusion on my phone. He would have... wait" Jane started thinking. Something just occurred to her. "He was never going after the fancy jewelry Korsak. Remember, the pictures? We established he was going after those pieces." Jane said out loud.

"I still think it's one or the other. Even if those were the pieces he always wanted, which now that you say that I agree with you, he still wouldn't have known precisely where to look. Even when you pulled out that drawer I wouldn't have known. It matches, what, a dozen other drawers around the room? There is nothing indicating that is where to start. He either knew where to go or he had time Jane. I stand by what I said." Korsak stated back.

"Ok ya, you are right," Jane said nodding in thought. "Ok back to what I was saying. Frost, focus on the last 12 days to up to the date we pulled that evidence on my phone. He would have had to pull those pictures before going after them. I don't know if that window helps, but it's worth a shot. Korsak, I want a list of every single person on shift at Maura's house, who shifted when, who even walked past her house and looked at it funny. I want every detail. And then I'll start interviewing." Jane said.

Korsak commented back, "Jane maybe I should do the interviewing. We don't want to scare these guys into not talking, especially if someone accidentally slipped up. Dr. Isles is respected by everyone, even when guys make comments about her, it's not because they don't know she's the best. If anything they are harder on her because of how good she is."

Jane snarled at him. "Maybe. Maybe you can do the interviews, but let's look at the logs first" Jane looked at Maura again, "How are we doing on the autopsy, Maur?"

"I still have quite a ways to go. I'll be here when you get back" Maura said to Jane doing her best to look into her eyes through a telephone screen.

"You better be" Jane commented back. She then looked beyond Maura where Frost could be seen in the background, "And you.." Frost cut her off.

"I know, I know - stay put," Frost said. "She's in good hands"

"I said nothing about using your hands Frost" Jane joked to try to lighten the mood. It worked, everyone laughed just a bit. The stressed circled around them. No one was putting their guard down anytime soon.

"Talk to you soon," Jane said and hung up.


End file.
